It's All Been Done

by Melanie Lakey

Copyright 2000

CHARACTERS: Joxer and Gabrielle, natch...

RATING: G, I would say.

SUBTEXT: Just Gab/Jox! ::evil grin:: Xena and Gab are straight in my universe.

VIOLENCE: Stuff gets thrown, but no one is hurt.

HURT/COMFORT: Not really, but Joxer cheers Gabby up.

SUMMARY: Joxer inspires Gabby. And that's all I'm going to say, because it's such a short story that anything else I reveal will basically spoil the plot. *g*

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I have to admit, I freaked out a bit when I saw the lyrics I had received because I had NO ideas! But I got over it and my own difficulties in writing the story actually helped me figure out a premise for a plot, and I hope that it turned out well. I had a lot of fun writing it. Thanks, yar, for the great lyrics and for a really challenging sixth round of GJRS Lyrics Challenge! (I know, that was bad.) So...enjoy, I hope!

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It was a dark and stormy night, and the trees swung wildly as the thunder crashed and the lightning made rips and tears in the black blanket of the sky. The young warrior was----

No, no, no. It wasn't a dark and stormy night! It was a sunny, warm morning...yeah, a *bright*, sunny, warm *morning*. As the midnight-haired woman rose from her bedroll, she---

NO! This is all wrong. It was definitely a dark and stormy night! And the trees, the trees were---

"AAAAAAAIIIIEEEEEEE!"

Joxer ducked just in time to narrowly avoid being hit by the flying scroll that slammed against the tree he had been leaning against and made a small dent, tender green wood now exposed beneath the bark.

"Hey, Gabrielle, what's the big idea?" he snapped, taking off his helmet and throwing it aside to check and see if he'd lost any of his head. "You could have put my eye out!"

The bard growled and picked up the crumbled pieces of scroll that lay all around her, gathering them into her arms, then threw them at Joxer with a sound not altogether unlike Xena's war cry. Her quill and inkwell joined them before he could even protest.

"I'VE HAD IT! I'VE HAD IT WITH WRITING!" Gabrielle screamed, coming toward him with her arms outstretched in what was obviously not a friendly gesture. The young woman's aqua-hued eyes flashed dangerously and her nostrils flared. "I've HAD IT, JOXER!" Just as she lunged for his throat, Joxer stumbled to one side and fell on his back.

"Time out!" he cried frantically, holding up both hands in a gesture of peace. "Okay, you've had it with writing! I heard you! You don't have to *choke* it into me!"

Gabrielle's eyes flickered for a moment, then she sighed as the fight seemed to go out of her. "Gods, Joxer, I'm sorry." The Amazon Queen flung herself down next to her friend, slinging one hand over a bent knee and gripping her forehead with the other. "It's just that...I can't..."

Joxer sat up in an easy movement and scooted towards her, offering a supportive hand on her shoulder. "You've got writer's block." He smiled a little, struggling not to laugh at the mess scattered around them. He knew that laughter right now would probably put her completely over the edge, and he was enjoying being able to breathe at the moment.

She just nodded and exhaled quickly in a hiss. "It's all been done, Joxer," she spat, her voice sounding oddly choked. "It's all been done. I can't write anything different, I can't change my style or be creative, I--"

As Joxer heard her voice rising with each syllable, he quickly put an arm around her shoulders and gave her a comforting squeeze. "Calm down, Gabby, it's gonna be okay..." His eyes widened as the painful memory of the last time he had told her to calm down rushed back to him. "Um, I meant--"

Gabrielle chuckled lightly, shaking her head. "No, Joxer, it's okay. You're right--this time. I do need to calm down." She rubbed her forehead. "I hate losing control like that." Without realizing it, the bard placed her head against the warm shoulder next to her.

The clumsy warrior stifled a gulp and patted her back gently, not wanting to spoil this moment. It was hard enough just getting her to sit next to him sometimes, and opportunities to embrace and comfort his love were few and far between. She usually went right to Xena. But luckily for Joxer, the Warrior Princess was busy picking up supplies and had taken the opportunity to provide Eve with some new clothes.

Joxer laughed and poked his friend's shoulder teasingly. "Hey, at least you don't kiss people and then punch them---oh, no, wait, you do." He ducked the blow he knew was coming, but Gabrielle just blushed and flicked his forehead with two slender fingers.

"Not funny, Joxer!" she scolded, a pout spreading to those cute little rosy lips Joxer could have stared at for hours. "You had no right to--" Gabrielle stopped in mid-accusation and let out an embarrassed laugh. "Well, I guess *I* had no right to, actually. But..."

The warrior wannabe stopped her by lightly pressing a finger to her open mouth. "Don't even worry about it, Gabby. I've been punched--and slapped--and tweaked on the nose--AND pulled by the ear before." A hidden smile danced in his eyes.

She laughed, narrowing her bright orbs. "You're *really* asking for it." The bard picked up the first scroll she had thrown and waved it threateningly at him, but for once she had no intention of following through on her threat. Joxer was totally justified in ribbing her for her somewhat scapegoatish treatment of him, and she knew it very well. But she couldn't let Joxer know that, of course.

Joxer held up his hands again with a chuckle, surrendering. "Okay, okay, you were wrong, I was right. No, wait, that came out wrong!" He was attacked by a small, muscular body throwing itself onto his chest and digging for the ticklish spots in his neck. Joxer's sides shook as he squirmed and gasped for breath in the midst of his hysterical laughter. "Gabby---no--stop it----I'm serious!"

Gabrielle smirked down at him, leaning her elbow against his breastplate and using her hand to cushion her chin. "Oh, you're serious, are you? And am I supposed to quake with fear?"

"Of course!" Joxer replied mock-indignantly, a grin on his lips. "After all, I'm Joxer the Mighty and you're just Gabrielle the Bard!"

His grin quickly disappeared as he saw her expression fade into dejection again, and he mentally berated himself for the playful jibe, thinking he must have hurt her feelings. "Oh, gods, Gabby, I'm sorry! I was just kidding! You're a much better warrior than I am---all of Greece knows it!"

She shook her head dismissively. "No, Joxer, I know you were kidding." She sighed, rolling over onto her back amongst the crumpled scroll pieces, a few of them making crinkling sounds of protest. "You just reminded me that today I couldn't get a scroll done if my life depended on it."

Joxer frowned and stared up at the small streams of light peering through the tree's canopy, feeling guiltier by the minute. "Hey, look, Gabby, I shouldn't have said anything at all...I'm always annoying you or pissing you off or--"

"No. I'm always *getting* annoyed or pissed off." The bard shook her head. "You don't deserve my anger most of the time, Joxer, and I'm sorry. I just....I just have a short fuse, that's all....guess I always have." She sighed, crossing her legs at the ankles and following the gaze of her comrade's chocolate-brown eyes upwards. "I'm just so frustrated right now...I want to write so badly, and I just *can't*!" Her inkwell was roughly kicked aside as it was found by one small foot.

The young man turned his head in her direction. "Well, what did Aphrodite tell you the last time that you had this problem?" He sounded oddly professional, something Gabrielle had never really noticed about him before. She admitted to herself that he was a pretty good listener.

Trailing her fingers idly around her navel, the woman replied with an irritated tone, "She didn't actually *tell* me anything. I basically solved it myself. That's not going to work this time. This is different. I need to be inspired! I need an idea! By the gods, I need *something*!"

Joxer didn't think that it would be appropriate to tell her what he *really* thought she needed, so instead he just sat up and reached for his bag, digging around in it purposefully. This peaked the bard's curiosity and she tried to peer around his back.

"Joxer, what are you doing?" she called, her head raised a few inches off the ground at a slightly uncomfortable angle.

He didn't answer, but grinned when he finally managed to disentangle his lute from the mess that was his satchel. He'd picked up this lute after their visit to Melodia, where Jace had sort of intrigued him into wondering if he should give his music a little more time.

Joxer turned back to face her, the lute in his arms. "How about I play for you?" His eyes were large, soft pools of love and tenderness as he smiled bashfully. She had no idea that he wouldn't have offered this to anyone but her. His lute playing, when he was serious about it, was a big deal to him. Playing one of his special songs wasn't the same as giving music lessons to the girls in Meg's Tavern or playing for money. His real music was something that only Jace, his mother, and yes, Jett, had been privileged to hear.

With a light, almost girlish giggle, Gabrielle arched one eyebrow. "You're not trying to serenade me, are you, Joxer?" The question held no bite or malice whatsoever. "I mean, I..."

He shook his head. "Nah, but music helps some people write, and I thought that maybe this might be just what you needed." Of course, he wasn't being entirely truthful about his thoughts, but this was neither the time nor the place for him to be nursing a black eye. Joxer raised a hand to his lute and strummed it lightly, a soft sound emitting from it.

"Wait!" Gabrielle sprang up, grabbing a discarded scroll and unrolling it. She fumbled around for her quill and found it resting under Joxer's thigh, emitting a laugh from the man as she lightly tickled his forehead with it upon pulling it out. The inkwell was produced a moment later and she sat with the dipped quill pressed to the paper.

"Go." She smiled expectantly.

Joxer blinked. "Well, um, Gabby, I'm not a professional musician or anything like that, so if I play the same three chords over and over, don't laugh, okay?" He shyly chuckled as she just raised an eyebrow, impressed with his lack of bragging.

Joxer strummed the lute lightly again, playing the opening chord of a song he had written for his mother when he was a boy. He found himself humming along before he was halfway through, and by the time he stopped to rest his fingers, he had sung through another song for his mother, one for Jace and Jett, one for Eve, and the last for Gabrielle. The young bard in question had filled her entire scroll.

"So, what'd you think?" he asked nervously, setting down the lute and shaking out his fingers.

Gabrielle looked up from the scroll she was working on just as she grinned and wrote down the last word, then dropped her quill on the ground. "Hmm?" She raised the two golden brows, blinking once or twice as her concentration was broken.

Joxer raised his own eyebrows and pointed to his lute. "I said, what'd you think?"

The woman looked at him thoughtfully for a moment, studying his eyes. "I thought..." She broke off and put her scroll down next to her, intensely gazing at him as if she was trying to find something in his face. Joxer was almost uncomfortable, but he was grateful for any attention she gave him. He cringed, expecting a slap or something of that sort. He cleared his throat, feeling he should say something before she threw the scroll or inkwell at him again.

"Well, I understand if you didn't like it, Gabby, I mean..." He trailed off as she had when he saw that she was scooting closer to him. She looked up at him again, her brows furrowing.

"Don't hit me! I didn't mean to offend you!" Joxer started to hold up his hands, but Gabrielle shoved them back down and smiled softly before kissing him gently, full on the lips.

The kiss only lasted a second or two, but to Joxer it was an eternity. His eyes widened in surprise at first, then he quickly shut them because he knew, of course, that one of the cardinal rules of kissing was that you should close your eyes. When the bard's lips finally left his, he heard a soft whisper at his ear.

"Thanks, Joxer. I love you."

He opened his eyes quickly to see her light form retreating over the hill ahead and he blinked, wondering if she had really kissed him with no repercussions. No punch, no pinch, no yelling? As his eyes traveled downward, he noticed the full scroll at his feet and picked it up, curious to see what his music had inspired.

Joxer opened the scroll and a goofy smile came upon his face as he read the title. "Joxer the Mighty: Hero, Friend, and Beloved of Gabrielle." He laid down on his back again hugging the scroll and stared up at the light through the leaves of the tree, thinking it suddenly looked a little brighter.

END

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