Parental Advisory Rating: L, N, AC

Break out those V-Chips, everyone!

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"Robie! Don’t tell me what can’t be done! Tell me what can be! This is fucking ridiculous!" I kick the chair in front of me, sending it skittering across the floor. Kam barks in the other room. I pace over to the door, yank it open and go out on the balcony.

"Harper, I am on your plane, heading to New York. I can’t do anything from here but make phone calls. Beth is at the court, yelling at everyone, but it’s late. The judge knew what he was doing." I can hear Robie’s frustration in his voice, but it does nothing to match mine. Beth said since we managed to get the home visit canceled, Judge Flynn decided to fuck us over. On Friday night, just before the close of court, he ordered a supervised visit on Saturday morning.

"This will not happen! I will not let the fucking, psychotic bitch near my children. I will rot in hell before it happens. Do you understand me, Robie? You will be my fucking defense attorney if you don’t make this not happen."

"First off," Robie says sharply, cutting into my rant, "don’t be making any threats against her. We will not give them any excuse to do anything against you. And if something were to happen to her, I don’t want you to be the prime suspect. Second, you will not defy the court. I don’t get a rat’s ass what you think of Judge Flynn. We will get this fixed."

"It cannot be fucking fixed when I have to take my children to a court officer tomorrow morning!" I kick a flower pot across the balcony. I wish it was my mother-in-law’s head.

"It’s going to be okay, Harper. It’s a just court supervised visitation. It’ll be the last one ever."

"Robie, this is bullshit! You told me! You told me that there was no damn way she was getting my kids. No way a court would ever order this. No way!" I stop, unable to continue. My anger is suddenly overwhelmed by incredible grief. I crumple to the tile and choke back tears. "These are my babies."

"Harper," he says softly, recognizing my pain. "I love them like my own. I won’t let anything happen to them."

"It’s happening in the morning, Robie. Make it stop."

* * *

My babies.

They can’t make me leave them. I won’t do it. I look at my little boy, so happy and content as he nurses. I can’t leave him there for her.

"I won’t," I whisper, stroking his cheek with the tip of my finger.

"Kelsey, honey." Harper places her hand on my leg, still managing to hold Brennan and her bottle at the same time. "We have to do this. If we don’t, they’ll cite us for contempt."

"Not if they can’t find us."

"Kelsey, please. I know you’re upset. So am I, but we have to do this. It’s only for two hours. We can sit a restaurant across the street."

"How about in the hall, right outside the door?"

"I don’t think they’ll go for that, baby."

I don’t understand why she’s doing this to us." I wipe the tears away before they fall. "You’d think after all these years, she’d give up and let me be happy."

"Maybe that’s what it is, Kels. Maybe she’s jealous because you now have everything she was suppose to have, and didn’t."

"She didn’t want it. She had her chance, and she blew it."

"But, maybe, just maybe, she did want it and it didn’t work out for her. It doesn’t sound like she and your dad communicated much when they were married. Maybe that was the problem."

I shake my head. "I really don’t care. I want her to leave us alone. I want to live my life with you, and these babies, and I want her as far away from me as possible."

"And Robie and Beth are doing everything they can to make that happen. When they get done, she won’t be able to get within a thousand feet of us."

"And last week they said she had no chance at all. But yet, tomorrow, we have to take our babies down to a social service center, and turn them over to a stranger so she can see them."

"The only reason Judge Flynn did that is because we got the home visit stopped. It’s cheap retaliation."

Collin is finished. I adjust him so he’ll give up the tiny little burp, before he falls fast asleep on my shoulder. Harper gives me a hand in getting my clothes squared away, even though we’re totally alone tonight.

Brian was a total dear and took Kam up to Doug’s for the weekend. Honestly, he’s horribly upset by all this too. I don’t think he wanted to break down in front of Harper and me. He feels like a favorite uncle, or even a big brother, and he’s not sure how to handle all of it.

Brennan pushes her bottle away and grabs a handful of Harper’s hair for dessert. She’s very fond of her Mama’s hair. I can’t help but laugh as I reach over and untangle them from each other, then push the wet hair over her shoulder. "Now you’re going to need to wash that before bed."

"What’s the matter, Kels? Don’t you find baby slobber in my hair attractive? I heard it was an aphrodisiac."

"You were led astray on that piece of information, Tabloid." I lean over and give her a long, slow, sweet kiss. "But I love you." I lean against her shoulder. "Tell me how it’s only two hours and it’s going to be okay."

"It’s only two hours and it’s going to be okay."

I feel her lips on the top of my head. I close my eyes and will my brain to believe it, even though my heart and my stomach are screaming something else.

* * *

The ride to the Manhattan Social Services Center is silent. Robie and Beth are in a cab ahead of us. We are in our SUV, the twins in the backseat. I keep watching them in the rearview mirror. They are both happy, well fed, clean, beautiful. I take a deep breath, choking back tears. I hate this.

Kels is seething beside me. She’s furious with Beth, furious with Robie, and homicidal toward her mother.

We worked all night to try to stop this. Robie tried to use diplomacy with Bennett. That was a brief conversation. We finally resorted to calling Mother Stanton, but there was no answer at the bitch’s residence. We tried to reach another judge to issue an emergency stay, but Beth’s ex-partner was in the Caribbean for the long weekend.

So we are left with two options. Running away with our children or letting this happen. I keep trying to tell myself that two hours isn’t forever, that a state social worker will be present at all times, and this will never ever happen again. I swear it won’t.

Beth explained the procedure. We go to the site, meet the case worker, leave the children in her care and leave. We are required to go at least ten blocks away and not to return until the designated time. I tried to get Robie to be able to stay, but that’s not allowed either. Our plan of sitting in a diner next door are quashed. The bitch will not get one extra second with our children, however. If I see her there, I will not be responsible for my actions.

Brennan lets out a yell, her hello one. Her arms lift up from her car seat and she bangs them down. She loves doing that. It makes noise. Brennan loves anything that makes noise.

Kels and I don’t find much to say. There’s nothing to talk about. We’re sick with worry. We’re beyond furious. And there’s not a damn thing we can do about it. We can only wait until high noon.

God, please speed up time.

* * *

I won’t cry. I won’t give anyone who is going to have contact with my mother, or the courts that are going to decide our fate, anything to use against me. I’ll be as polite as I can be and pretend this is okay. When Harper has to drag me ten blocks away from my babies, I’ll break down and cry. Long and hard.

Harper parks the SUV and we get out, not moving as fast as we usually do in the cold winter weather, simply because we don’t want to have to do this at all. Harper gets the dual stroller from the back and brings it around while I unhook Brennan from her car seat. I hold her close and kiss her little cheeks. "I love you, baby. We’ll all be home soon and this will be over."

I don’t want her in the cold air any longer than need be. Placing her in the stroller and covering her with her quilt, I can almost see her snuggling in happily. She seems to love her blanket almost as much as I love Harper’s and mine. I reach across and release Collin from his seat. When I get him out, I find Harper leaning over the stroller.

"Tabloid, honey, let me get Collin settled."

"Let me have him." She extends her hands and I give him to her.

"Love you, little man. You be good today. Don’t you give her any reason to think you’re unhappy." Collin gurgles and flails at Harper before she puts him in the stroller next to his sister and covers him as well.

She turns to me. "Ready?"

"Ready to go to prison for the rest of my life to keep them out of her hands, Tabloid. Just let me kill her and solve all our problems."

She moves closer and places her hands on my arms. "Kelsey, darlin’, it’s only two hours. Then we’ll take them home…"

"I’ve been thinking about that, Harper. I want to take them home. When this is over I want to go home and I don’t mean to the apartment." I don’t care if we are in public, I loop my arm through Harper’s and lean against her as we walk toward the building. I want to be close to her and our babies. "Would you be against that?"

"Is that what you really want?"

"Yes. I’m pretty sure it is."

"Then we’ll find a way to make it work. A very wise man once told me, ‘If you keep the mother happy, the children will do just fine.’"

* * *

This time, we don’t find a parking spot directly in front of the building. Figures. We park in a garage a block up and walk back. That’s not accurate. We run. I want my babies.

The guard behind the front desk looks up at us and smiles compassionately. "Mrs. Kingsley," she greets us both. She gathers up her ample girth and pushes herself to her feet. "Let’s go gather up your young’uns." She taps the receptionist on the shoulder as we leave.

We nod mutely and follow her to the elevator. Waiting behind for us are Robie and Beth in the reception area. Kels reaches over and grabs my hand, squeezing it hard. The elevator seems to be powered by two tired hamsters.

Finally, we arrive at the third floor and step out into the hallway. The room where we dropped off Brennan and Collin is about forty feet to the left of the elevator, near the end of the hallway. When we get to the room, she knocks on the door and announces us. Without waiting for a reply, she opens the door.

Two of the longest hours of my life are over. I can’t wait to stroke Fuzzy’s hair and get a big smile from my girl. We are then going to take them home, bathe them, and dote on them the rest of the day. A plan I can get behind.

I look around for my babies. They’re not in the room. No one is.

"Huh?" the guard grunts. "I thought we dropped them off here. It must have been the next room."

"It was here," Kels says, her voice flat.

"Can’t be, no one’s here. Let’s get them next door." She walks out and heads toward the next room.

"We left them here, Harper," Kels whispers, her tone now urgent.

I nod mutely. "I thought so too." I look around for another door in the room. Is there a closet? A bathroom? But, other than a window, there are no more entrances or exits.

"She took them," Kels expresses my deepest fear.

What did that case worker look like? Jesus, I wasn’t paying any attention to her. I was so focused on my babies. Think, Harper. She had red hair, I remember that. And she was heavyset.

Oh, God. I can’t remember.

"Let’s check the rest of the floor." Maybe, since there isn’t one here, the social worker took them into a bathroom to change their diapers. I voice this theory to my wife. She says nothing, which is so not a good sign.

When we step out into the hallway, the guard is moving much more quickly. She hustles as fast as she can to the next several rooms. All of which confirm our children are nowhere to be found.

"Harper," Kels says.

I understand. I pull my cell phone off my belt and hit Robie’s speed dial. "What’s up?" he asks, recognizing my number from her caller ID.

"They’re not here."

"Mon Dieu! Are you sure?"

"Is she sure of what?" Beth asks in the background.

"The babies are gone," he replies.

"We’re making sure right now. I’m going to fucking tear this building apart brick by brick. Call the police, Robie."

"Beth’s doing it right now." I hear him move across the room, nearly colliding with a few people along the way. "How many floors in this building?" he asks someone.

"Ten."

"Did you hear that, Harper?"

"I did. We’re searching the third floor right now."

"I’ll get this building locked up so no one can go out except through the front door and past Beth and I." To the person he’s speaking to there, he says, "Are there any exits on upper floors? Bridges to other buildings? Roof access to another one?"

"No."

Beth’s voice. "Police are on their way. Ask if they know what type of car the bitch drives."

"Kels, do you know what type of car your mother has?"

Kels’ expression is unlike any I have ever seen before. "A fucking hearse when I’m done with her."

"We don’t know, Robie."

The guard comes huffing back over to us, the exertion too much for her. "I don’t know what to say, Mrs. Kingsley. The social worker should have been there the whole time."

"Fucking bitch probably kidnapped her too," Kels growls. She stalks over to the door marked ‘Stairs – Emergency Exit, Alarm Will Sound’ and pushes it open. No alarm sounds. "Jesus Christ!" she mutters. "Where does this go?"

The guard confirms my worst fears. "It goes down a protected stairwell to the back of the building and leads outside."

Kels and I immediately start heading down the stairs. The stairwell is dimly lit and is colder than the rest of the building; it smells damp. We go down one flight and see a door marked ‘No Re-entry’. We try it, but this time the sign is accurate. We go down another flight and come to a small hallway. At the end of it is a door. Opening it, we find a small courtyard behind the building. There are three exits from the courtyard between buildings. Two lead to the street, one to the avenue.

The sound of sirens is welcome. I hope they brought the whole brigade. And that they have orders to shoot on sight.

We go around the building and re-enter through the front door right into the middle of the chaos. Robie is explaining what has happened and is startled to see us coming in the building. "How the hell -? Never mind. Officer, here are the twins’ parents, Harper and Kelsey Kingsley."

He turns around and gives us a look. Great. I don’t need this right now. "Ma’am," he says, politely, surprising me. "Can you tell me what happened?"

Kels looks to me. I find my voice and try to be as calm as possible. "We brought our children here for a court supervised visitation with their maternal grandmother. The visit was scheduled to begin at 10 am and last until noon. At noon, we turned here, went upstairs with the guard and found the room empty. We had been assured that Collin and Brennan would not be removed from the premises."

"She took them," Kels adds.

"Jerry," the cop says to his partner and lifts his jaw toward the front desk. Jerry ambles over to talk to them. "What’s the name of the grandmother?"

"Katherine Stanton."

"Are you in a custody battle with her, ma’am?"

"No. Kelsey is the birth mother and I adopted both children about a month ago."

He takes notes in handwriting that I doubt even he can read later. He looks up from his pad. "How old are they?"

"They were born November 23. So almost two months."

Kels shudders. Since she’s leaning against me, I can feel the tremors as they go through her body. "They need me. They’re breastfeeding."

The officer looks a little uncomfortable with that thought. He looks at Kels for a long moment and squints. With the blunt end of his pen, he scratches his sideburn. "You look familiar, Miss."

Langston is going to shit a brick. But, of course, I don’t care. We might as well use Kels’ celebrity for our good. Kels seems to have the same thought when she replies, "I’m Kelsey Stanton."

Now it clicks for him. "You’re on that TV show, right? The news one?" When Kels confirms this, he continues. "I remember when you left to have your baby. I didn’t know it was twins."

"Collin and Brennan," I say, wanting them to be real to him. I reach into my pocket and pull out my wallet. I proudly pull out the pictures of my babies. "Collin is the one with the fuz -" I stop, too choked up to speak for a moment. "Fuzzy hair. Brennan is the blonde."

"Can I take these, ma’am?"

No! "Yes."

Jerry comes back over. "Guard confirms. The children weren’t to be taken off the premises. The social worker is missing. They have two lawyers here," he indicates Beth and Robie, "who showed me the paperwork. The grandmother doesn’t have custody."

"Issue an APB on the grandmother and the babies. Also on the social worker. Get the gold shields here pronto. Notify the FBI." He directs his next question to Kelsey. "What’s your mother’s date of birth?"

"God, it’s not like I celebrated her birthday. I don’t know. Is it important?"

He nods. "I need it to move the DMV search faster."

Kels takes my cell phone from me. She only punches in two numbers, so I know she’s calling someone on speed dial. Matthew. That makes sense. "Dad? Thank God, I found you at home! I need to know mother’s date of birth." She pauses while Matt must naturally be questioning her as to why she needs it. "She took the babies, Dad. She took them! And now the police need her birthday so they can look her up with the DMV." Kels begins sobbing. She extends the phone to the cop.

"This is Officer O’Neal."

I gather Kels in my arms and pull her tight against me. "We’re going to get them back, sweetheart."

She doesn’t reply.

"Let me confirm, sir. Her address is 46 Willow Bark Avenue, Scarsdale, New York. She drives a 2000 Mercedes SL 600 license plate W-A-S-M-A-T-S. Is that correct?" He nods, despite the fact my father-in-law can’t see him. "We’ll broadcast that immediately."

"Tell me this isn’t happening," Kels murmurs against my chest.

I wish I could. God, I wish I could. We should have left. I shouldn’t have brought them here. This is all my fault. I should have listened to Kels. We should have taken them the hell out of town.

"Listen, you two need to go home," the cops says softly. "Once this gets out on the airwaves, the press will be swarming here. Especially given who you are, Miss Stanton. Go home. The detectives and the fibbers will be there shortly."

"We need to search the building," I protest.

"Ma’am, we’ll do that. I doubt if she’s here, to be honest. But we’ll make sure she isn’t."

"I’ll stay here," Beth offers. "Robie, you take them home."

My brother nods, hanging up his cell phone. Dollars to donuts, he was talking to Papa. "Come on. Let’s go home. Maybe she’s going to call you."

"Bitch!" Kels swears.

I kiss Kels’ hair. "Let’s go home."

"It’s not home without them."

That’s the truth.

* * *

We are all seated around the dining room table. Our house has been invaded. Detective Lieutenant Parks is seated across from us. His partner, Detective Wynn is standing against the wall. Special Agent Kyle Donovan is at the head of the table. I am glad to have someone we know here. And someone who kinda owes us a favor. Christ, we did save the whole damn city. That ought to be worth something. His partner, Special Agent Susan Sawyer, is seated at the table as well.

We’ve gone through the physical descriptions, given more photographs, made copies of their footprints. Each moment has been torture, pure and simple. How did we get here? How did I ever let this happen?

"Approximately an hour ago, we were given a warrant to search your mother’s house, Ms. Stanton," Kyle informs us.

"Were they there?" Kels asks softly.

"I’m afraid not. However, we now believe that this was a deliberate and planned kidnapping, not just a crime of opportunity. We also believe that Katherine Stanton is the one who planned it and not the social worker, Melanie James."

"What happened there? What did you find?" Robie asks.

"Out by the trash were two boxes. They were both for infant car seats."

It’s completely irrational, but that comforts me. At least my babies are safe. The bitch is insane, she stole my kids, but she cares about their safety. I will still fucking kill her. But I’ll do it quickly now.

"There was also packaging from other baby supplies. We didn’t find any of the items in the house. Further, some of her clothing was missing."

Kels blows her nose, which is bright red from crying constantly. "Her car?"

Kyle smiles. "That’s good news. It’s there. We are contacting the rental car companies. I believe we will soon have her vehicle information."

"The airports?" I ask.

"All the New York metro airports are on alert. We’ve also gone as far north as Boston and as south as Washington, DC. She won’t be flying." He folds his hands in front of him on the table. "There is a possibility that this might be a plan for her to extort money from you."

"Ransom?" Kels asks.

"Exactly. Do you know, Ms. Stanton, if your mother was experiencing financial difficulty of late?"

Kels snorts. "Always. She spent it like water. She had come to Harper and I before the babies were born and tried to get money from us."

Significant looks are exchanged among all of the law enforcement professionals. "That certainly puts a new light on this crime." Kyle addresses his next question to his partner. "Is the set up complete in the kitchen?"

"It’s good to go."

"We have installed a tape device on the kitchen phone. For the time being, only answer the phone in there. We’ll have a man stationed here twenty-four/seven in case she calls with a demand. If she does, the goal is to keep her talking for as long as possible for the trace to go through. Every second you have her on the phone, we get a closer read on her location."

We nod. If I get the call, it’ll be no problem staying on the line. I have a thing or two to take up with her.

"The press is downstairs. You need to decide how you want to handle them."

"We’ve already talked to our producer," I tell them, "that’s all the press we want to deal with." I think Langston is a bit overwhelmed by the life we lead, to be honest. Given Kels’ current state of mind, I don’t think she’d have any problems buying out her contract.

"They can bite my ass." Kelsey pushes herself up from the table and starts to head toward the kitchen. I assume she remembers that another policeman is in there and she does an about face and heads toward the living room.

It’s only six p.m.

I could swear it’s 2002.

* * *

Kels is a mess. She won’t eat. She won’t rest. One minute she’s ranting and seething, describing in great detail what she wants to do to her mother when she gets her hands on her. The next minute she’s in tears.

Right now, she quietly rests in my arms. I managed to talk her into taking a hot shower and changing into something more comfortable for the evening. I hate seeing her like this.

"They must be getting hungry," she whispers quietly. I can hear more tears behind her words. She shifts and groans a bit. "I need… I need to…"

Without another word she gets up and goes to the kitchen. With a deep sigh I get up and follow her. She is working by rote. Getting ready to prepare bottles. She has laid out everything she needs and keeps pushing tears from her cheeks as she readies the supplies.

"Kels…"

"I need to do this," she says flatly. "I have to do something."

"I know." I move closer to the counter, without invading her space. "Can I help?"

"Yeah." She turns and places herself in my arms and begins crying again. "They need me, Harper. They’ve had to have already had the bottles we sent with them. What are they eating? They’ve never had anything but my milk. We don’t even know of they can keep formula down. What if they’re sick? What if they can’t eat…"

"Shhhh… Kels, I’m sure they’re fine." I’m not sure they’re fine, but I have to tell her that. Holding her close, I rub her back and kiss the top of her head, wishing I would wake up and this nightmare would be over.

"I need to go express my milk." She moves away, collecting two of the bottles and heading upstairs for the nursery.

I lean against the counter. I want to follow her, but know she needs some time alone.

"Harper?" I look up to find Robie. He looks as tired as I feel. "Is Kels okay?"

I shake my head. "No. No, she’s not okay. I’m really worried about her. I’ve never seen her quiet like this before. I mean, if she’s mad about something, she gets mad and stays mad. If she’s upset, she gets upset and stays upset. But this is brand new. It’s scary."

He enters and takes a seat at the kitchen table. "Beth and I are still working the phones and fax lines. We’ve filed papers with everyone we can think of. I put in a call to Bennett’s office advising him that if he knows where she is and doesn’t want to be an accomplice to kidnapping, it would be in his best interest to tell us where his client is."

"Okay." I barely hear his words as I glance at my watch. I know how long it takes Kels to deal with the bottles. "I’ll be back."

Leaving my brother in the kitchen, I slowly climb the stairs to the nursery. When I push open the door, my heart breaks all over again. Kels is curled up on the lounger with Brennan’s favorite teddy bear and she’s sobbing.

Slowly, carefully, I join her and pull her into my arms. Reaching up, I pull down our blanket and cover us both. I know where we’ll be sleeping until this is over. As I look at empty cribs and listen to my wife’s sobs lessen into heart-shattering whimpers, I’ve never in my life felt more helpless.

I feel Kels relaxing and I watch as exhaustion and grief finally take their toll and she falls into a fitful sleep. It’s not much, but it’s something. My own mind and heart are in absolute turmoil. I hurt more now than ever before. "We’ll get them back, Kels." I kiss the top of her head. "I promise you, we’ll get them back."

* * *

Morning.

The new day brings us another cold front, Matthew, Amanda and Claire, my parents, and Rene, Christian and Clark, but not what we need most.

Word about our children.

At first, I thought Matt was being incredibly insensitive bringing Claire. I love my niece – I know she’s really my sister-in-law, but I can’t handle that – but seeing her nearly undid me. Yet her laughter has brought a much needed relief to the apartment. And it reminds me of the best of Collin and Brennan, not the worst of them being kidnapped.

I was anxious for Christian to arrive. His unconditional love for Kels is a balm to her soul. Wherever she goes, he’s not far behind. I’m holding Clark, the big chunk, as much as possible. However, he seems to have eyes for a cute little redhead. How will I react to it when my nephew marries my wife’s sister?

Well, I’ll worry that we somehow moved to Kentucky.

I’ll sit with Collin and Brennan at the wedding and the three of us will laugh our asses off, as their cousin becomes their uncle with two simple words.

Because I will sit there with them. They will be beside me. They will return.

I used to always laugh at the line from ‘The Last of the Mohicans’ but now I find myself whispering it constantly, willing my babies to hear me no matter where they are:

"Whatever you do, stay alive. I will find you."

* * *

I’m so tired. It’s been less than a day since she took them but there’s been no contact. I overheard the FBI agents talking about how that was a bad sign, meaning that she probably wasn’t after us to extort money. And the longer we go without word…

I may never see my babies again.

I listen as Harper finishes her shower. I know she was awake most of the night, because every time I opened my eyes, she was there with me, holding me and comforting me. Then with the arrival of our families this morning, we haven’t had time to even clean up.

We’re clinging to each other right now, more so than ever before. I’m glad for that. Some crises rip people apart. I couldn’t handle losing her too right now. I tighten my robe around my throat, trying to keep warm. I can’t seem to do so. My hands are cold and I’m constantly shivering. My body aches and I’m in physical pain from not being able to feed my babies regularly.

God, I’m so worried about them eating. Surely, even my mother would have the good sense to bring them back to us if they were sick. Then another idea comes to mind. Oh, no, she wouldn’t? She’s not that desperate for money. Getting up from the bed, I go into the bathroom and interrupt Harper’s shower.

"What’s the matter, Kels?" she asks, quickly drying off. "Did she call?"

"Harper, what if her plan is to sell them?"

"Jesus." The look on her face says that, like me, she hadn’t thought of that before. She grabs her robe and throws it on. We both head into the living room where everyone is gathered. "What if she’s planning on selling them?"

Several sets of eyes drop. "We’ve already thought of that, Harper," Robie says softly. "We’ve tried to cover all the possibilities."

"Do you think that’s a real one?" Harper asks.

"I’m afraid that since no call has been made to you, it’s not completely out of the realm of imagination." Kyle’s shoulders slump a bit. "But, I swear to you, that we are doing everything we can."

"Well, everything just isn’t good enough, is it?!" I march across the room and face off with the FBI agent. "Dammit, Kyle! For all we know, she has already sold my babies. Right?" His eyes drop and I grab his arm. "Right!?"

"Kels…" Harper says softly, behind me.

I hear her voice. Someone is touching me. All of this is too much to bear right now. I pull away. "Don’t! Don’t touch me! Leave me alone. Just leave me alone! Don’t tell me any more how it’s going to be all right! It’s not all right. My babies are gone! She took them! It’s not all right. It’ not going to be all right until we get them back and that may not happen!"

I feel the anger building and I know no one here deserves it, but I can’t help myself. I take a deep breath and close my eyes tight. "I carried them. I gave birth to them. We nearly lost Collin once…" I stop to catch my breath and suddenly feel very dizzy.

* * *

I manage to catch Kels as she passes out. I bend down and place my arm under her legs and cradle her against me.

"Aunt Kels!" Christian screams, rushing toward us.

He collides with my legs and begins reaching for his favorite aunt. Robie is quickly at his side. "She’s all right, son."

"She’s dead!" he wails, hot tears streaking down his face.

Alarmed at the thought, I put my cheek by her lips. I feel her breath on my skin and feel instantly better. "She’s not dead, Christian. She’s just sleeping."

"Sleeping?" he echoes.

Robie scoops him up and holds him level with Kels. "See? She’s just tired. Sometimes, people get so tired, their body makes them sleep."

"She’s only sleeping?" he asks again, still not quite convinced.

I nod. "Just sleeping, I promise." I would be jumping off the balcony if it were any different. "I’m going to go put her in our bedroom. Do you want to come with me and tuck her in?"

He nods gravely.

The four of us head into the bedroom and I lay her down gently. I hope Kels will be out for a little while. She needs sleep. I place our wedding blanket over her and step back to let Christian tug it up under her chin. "Give her a kiss, Christian. Everyone gets tucked in with a kiss," I remind him.

He blushes, but obeys. I add my own to her forehead and we all go back to the living room.

I sit next to Rene and she leans against my shoulder, handing me a sleeping Kelly. "Thanks," I whisper. I push back a bit of hair that tumbles over the infant’s eyes. I miss my Fuzzy. After a moment, I look at Matt. "I’ve been thinking about our discussion last night. About why Katherine did this."

He grunts. He’s been great. Dad made a few phone calls and Kyle had no other cases to work on but ours. He made another call and we had Executive Assurance here in the apartment. They’re a high end investigative agency which provides protection for corporate executives. They also provide rescue services in kidnap situations. We spent a good amount of time with them yesterday.

I am so tired of talking.

I want my kids.

"I think the woman went off her meds." He reaches out and takes hold of Amanda’s hand. I suppose to assure himself of his better choice this time around.

"I think it’s a ‘fuck you’ to you."

"Seems a bit misdirected, Harper. Why didn’t she take Claire instead?"

For a moment, I almost wish she had, but I catch myself thinking the evil thought and cast it aside. No one should go through this. No one. Especially not anyone I care about. "Because she gets two targets this way. She’s said she’s opposed to Kels being gay. She believes it to be unnatural. In fact, she urged me to take the children away from Kels. But that doesn’t make any sense. So she’s not truly opposed only to homosexuality, but she has a vendetta against Kels." I pause and try to think like the bitch for a moment. "Then she shows up in New Orleans and finds you and Amanda and Claire there. I bet in her mind, you have it all. You kept the money, the prestige, the respectability. You managed to get back Kels, after she thought she had successfully alienated the two of you for life. You remarried and had another beautiful daughter. You have it all. Except now she’s taken away your grandchildren."

"Not for long, Harper. Not for long."

* * *

Later Mama finds me in the kitchen. The Special Agent leaves discreetly. He’ll be back here in a second if the phone rings, this I know. Mama slides her arms around my neck and hugs me tightly. "I love you, mon Coeur. And those babies are coming home. Have faith. I know things."

I return her embrace, wishing my Mama could kiss it and make it all better for me. That’s what mamas do. Of course, Mother Stanton doesn’t understand a thing about that. Is she kissing them goodnight? Singing them to sleep? Making sure they’re warm enough? Fed? Keeping their diapers clean? No one on this earth can love them more than their mother and me.

I realize that with each question a fresh round of tears is released. "This is my fault, Mama."

"Nonsense."

"It is! I let her in our house in New Orleans. I let her see our babies." I gasp for air, feeling like someone punched me in the stomach. "She saw them and decided she wanted them. My God! I made Kels let her see them. And I drove them to that place yesterday. I took them there. I gave them up to her. I shouldn’t have done it. Kels didn’t want to, but I made her. I lost them!"

"Shh, my baby girl." Mama pulls me even closer and strokes my hair. "You could never have known."

"I should have," I gasp. "I should have protected my family. Instead, I lost them."

I sense another presence in the room and I realize that Papa has entered without me hearing him. He wraps his arms around Mama and me and holds us both tight. "Everyone is responsible for their own actions, Harper. We raised you knowing that. Your action was to open up your heart. Her action was to abuse it. Never be ashamed of believing in anyone. Even when you are proven wrong."

"But my children, Papa. Should my children pay the price?"

"They won’t, Harper. I believe that. You need to, as well." He kisses my hair. "Remember, even though she took them, she bought them car seats, clothing, diapers, bottles. She’ll keep them safe, because they mean enough to her for her to walk out on everything else she had."

"You think so, Papa?" I so want to believe him.

He nods. "I do. Remember your Tante Veronique?"

"She was crazy."

"That’s right, she was. She couldn’t hold down a job, barely could work around the house, mean as spit to grown ups. But how was she around children?"

I remember Tante Unique, as we kids called her. She worshipped us. Always had candy and gum. Told us outrageous stories. Played games. She was the perfect aunt until you hit puberty. After that, you knew well enough to leave her alone. But if you had a colicky infant who needed attention and soothing, Tante Unique was on the job. "I do."

"I think this Katherine Stanton is like her in that way. Isn’t that what you saw when she visited our house?"

"She was gentle with them," I concede. I remember being amazed at the time.

"I believe she’ll take care of them, because doing so keeps them with her. And if they’re with her, they’re not with you." He kisses my hair. "Remember how easy it was to find Tante Veronique around the family farm?"

I surprise myself buy laughing at the memory. "She could never hide. She was too outrageous."

"That’s Katherine Stanton. She sticks out like a sore thumb. It won’t be long, baby girl. I know it."

If Papa knows it, it must be true.

* * *

Harper and I are in our room, trying to rest and block out the world for a few moments. We’re both exhausted, physically and emotionally. We’ve cried, we’ve gotten angry, we’ve begged and bargained. I refuse to hit acceptance. I will never accept this.

The lights are off. I’m laying in her arms as she watches the evening news. Her thumb is running up and down my back. "I’m sorry," I whisper.

"For what, darlin’?"

"That she did this to us. To you. To our babies. I wish she had just directed her anger at me and left the three of you out of it. You don’t deserve it, and Brennan and Collin most definitely don’t."

"Kels, it’s not like you knew she was going to do this. I know I didn’t. What I wouldn’t give for us to have run away with our babies on Saturday."

"I know but…" Before I can say anything else, I feel Harper tense. I roll over to see pictures of my babies on the TV screen. "Turn it up."

"Reliable sources tell us that the children were abducted by the maternal grandmother during a court ordered visitation. If you have any information, please call the…."

I can’t watch anymore. God, I’ve done stories like this. I’ve sat in living rooms with distraught parents and told them how sorry I was and how I understood what they were going through. I realize, at this very moment, I didn’t know anything about what they were feeling.

So, basically, I’ve been a phony my entire life. My career is a fucking lie. Why do I feel like my life is crashing down around me? Probably, because it is. "I swear to you, Tabloid, when we get them back, I’ll never let them out of my sight again."

"I know, baby. I feel the same way." She gives me another hug, keeping me close.

"First L.A., now New York. Are we ever going to find peace, Harper?"

"Yes, chér, we are. I promise you, we are."

<to be continued>

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