Chapter Fifteen

"What took you so long to get here?" Regina demanded, as she trotted across her parent’s gravel driveway to Jeff’s rental car. Remnants of the autumn’s fallen leaves skittered over the frozen ground as a cold wind swirled around them. She slid her hand through her brother’s arm and huddled close to ward off the cold breeze that penetrated her thin, cotton shirt.

"I just drove around town, trying to figure out if I really wanted to come here or not." Jeff jammed his free hand into his coat pocket as he walked alongside her. He looked up at the house and sighed. "Is everybody here already?"

"Yes." Regina glanced over at her brother, hearing the nervous rasp in his voice.

"Crap, I need a drink." He ducked his head sorrowfully. "Do you think Mom really threw all my stuff out, Reg?"

Regina brought a hand up and ran her hand through her hair. "I don’t know. Jeff, everything will be fine. Just remember, Dad asked you to come here. That should mean something." Regina squeezed her brother’s hand and then let him go as they approached the house.

"Yeah, but what?" Jeff trudged sullenly up the porch steps, then, turned around to look back down the steps at Regina. "Should, is the operative word, Reg."

"Jeff, maybe he just wants us to be a family again?"

"Ah, come on, after everything that happened how can you say that? Take the rose-colored glasses off, Regina." Jeff opened the storm door and swept his arm out in front of him. "After you."

Regina offered her father a hesitant smile as she stepped into the house and walked past him. She touched Alex’s arm and guided her out of the hallway. "Let’s give them some time alone."

Alex brought her lips close to Regina’s ear. "How’s Jeff?"

"He’s a nervous wreck and suspicious as hell. He can never take anything at face value. I guess that’s why he makes such a good lawyer." Regina walked through the living room and led the way into a small den. The room was lined on two walls with bookshelves that were overflowing with books.

Alex watched Regina lower herself into an overstuffed, leather chair.

The blonde glanced up at her companion and offered her a half smile. "This is my father’s favorite chair to read in," Regina commented absently.

The taller woman tilted her head and folded her arms over her chest as she observed the emotional strain showing on Regina’s face. "How are you holding up?"

The younger woman ran a hand through her hair and pushed several renegade strands behind an ear. "Eh, got any Valium I can take?"

Alex snorted and let her arms drop to her side. "Nope, only the Haldol I need to keep my alter ego in check."

Regina frowned and then buried her head in her hands as a heated flush crept up her neck. "Oh Lord, I did tell you that didn’t I?"

A low chuckle emanated from deep inside Alex’s chest. "Yes, you most certainly did, my friend."

Alex crossed the room to where Regina was sitting and leaned against the arm of the chair. She cast a wary glance out to the hallway before she stroked the blonde’s face and let her fingers slide down to affectionately scratch the nape of her neck. "I knew I met my match that day."

The blonde leaned into the caress and closed her eyes, awash in the security of the loving touch. "Can we just stay here, away from everyone else for the rest of the weekend?"

"I’d love to Regina, but I don’t think that would go over to well with the rest of your family." Alex tilted the blonde’s neck back and placed a feather light kiss on Regina’s lips.

"That was a nice kiss," she murmured into Alex’s shoulder. With a sigh, Regina peered up into gray blue irises that steadily returned her gaze.

"Just nice?" The brunette nuzzled Regina’s neck, inhaling the warm scent of her perfume. Oh you are so bad, Alex chided herself as a thrill of danger coursed through her. Knock it off. She doesn’t need her family walking in here with you hanging all over her.

"You know what I mean." Regina poked her playfully in the ribs.

"Uh oh, I think I hear your brother." Alex lifted her head and listened as Jeff’s voice got louder, and then faded away only to be replaced with his brother’s a moment later.

Regina stiffened when she heard the angry voices coming from across the hallway. "Damn, I can hear Mike and Dad arguing." She stood up from the chair and shook her head. "Let me go talk to them so this doesn’t get any worse."

******

"So, you actually made it. I wasn’t sure you were going to." Robert eyed his son warily, realizing that a lifetime of betrayal, missed opportunities, and bitter memories stood between the two of them.

The early afternoon sunshine coming in through a window cast their long, narrow shadows along the floor and halfway up the side of the wall.

Jeff shrugged out of his coat and draped it casually over his arm as he spoke. "I probably wouldn’t have bothered if Regina didn’t come."

"I kind of figured that." His father stepped forward and reached out for the garment. "Here. Let me take your jacket, son."

"I can do it." Jeff deftly avoided his father’s hand and walked to the closet, where he deposited his coat on a hanger. "See, after seventeen years I still remember where things are in this house. Surprised?"

"No." Robert ignored the insolent remark. "Your mother’s in the kitchen."

"Christ, give me a few minutes before you throw me to the wolves." Jeff turned around and glared angrily at his father.

"Watch your mouth, Jeff," his father warned him. "No matter what you think, your mother still cares about you."

"I don’t get it." Jeff waved his arms out in front of him. "Why after all these years, did you invite me out me here, Dad?"

Robert’s jaw worked several times before he finally uttered a word. "Sixteen years is a long time. How long do we have to wait to be a family again?"

Jeff turned away with his arms folded tightly over his chest, his brow furrowed in aggravation.

"I put the wine in the…refrigerator." Michael walked out of the kitchen and stopped in his tracks when he saw his older brother standing in the hallway. "Oh, I didn’t know you were here already."

Without a word, Jeff walked into the dining room, refusing to answer his brother. Son of a bitch! He focused on the room, noticing that his parents had it repainted since…it seems like forever, Jeff thought.

His mother’s china cabinet still sat against the back wall of the house and the liquor cabinet was right where he remembered it, in the corner next to the bay window. If Mom only knew how many times we raided their liquor supply, he mused.

Jeff walked around the oval table, counting seven place settings. Well, I guess they really did plan on me coming out here. He opened the liquor cabinet. "Do you want one?" He lifted a bottle of Scotch toward his father, sloshing the liquid in the half-filled bottle.

"No thanks."

"Suit yourself." Jeff shrugged and pointedly ignored his brother. He poured the tawny colored liquor into a glass tumbler. "You didn’t want me to be part of the family sixteen years ago." He took a swig of the alcohol and grimaced as it burned its way down his throat. "I’m still gay. So what changed your mind?"

"Bloody hell if I know. As far as I’m concerned you could have stayed gone!" Michael growled at Jeff from the hallway.

"Michael, enough!" his father snapped at him.

"Don’t hold back, Michael." Jeff returned his brother’s fiery stare. "Tell us how you really feel about me."

Michael looked away and shoved his hand in his pockets. "You know, I really didn’t think you were serious about this, Dad."

"I see you haven’t changed much. Nice to see you too, Mikey," Jeff retorted and tossed back another swallow of Scotch before he stalked out of the dining room.

Robert glanced down at the hardwood floor and sighed. Well, I guess that answers how they would get along. "Michael, please don’t make this weekend any harder than it’s going to be."

"You’re the one who decided to ask him to come home, not me!" Michael snapped. "We could have had a nice quiet dinner to celebrate Mom’s birthday, but no, you had to go and invite them all back."

"Don’t you think we’ve all suffered enough?" Robert spread his arms wide and implored his son to be reasonable.

Michael threw his arms up and then jabbed a finger at his father’s chest. "Don’t you dare blame me for what happened!"

"Nobody is blaming you. How can you say that?"

"Jeff was always your favorite. You couldn’t stand it when you found out he was a queer."

"Michael, your mother and I did what we thought was best for the family." Robert turned his back to his son and stared out the window with a forlorn expression on his face. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all.

"Go ahead. Turn your back and pretend I’m not here. That’s what you did to me after Mom threw Jeff out. That’s why I know you blame me, you bastard!"

Caroline walked into the room, carrying Zachary in her arms. "Hey, you woke the baby."

The boy’s face was burrowed in his mother’s chest and loud sobs hiccupped from him.

"What’s all the shouting about in here?" She wiped the tears from her son’s face, then, looked at her husband and raised a questioning eyebrow.

Michael rubbed his forehead in agitation. "Nothing hon, just an old disagreement." He walked over and lifted his son from his wife’s arms. "Sorry, Tiger." He turned away from his father. "Are you coming, Caroline?"

"Yeah, I’ll be right there. Your mom needs help in the kitchen with the roast, Michael." With a worried expression on her face, she watched her husband leave the room and then turned to her father-in-law. "Robert, is everything okay?"

"Everything’s fine, Caroline." Robert swallowed and looked away as the echo of ancient memories that haunted his soul.

******

After many bitter arguments, he relented and finally gave into his wife. He could still hear his wife’s angry voice ringing in his ears. "What kind of an influence is he going to be on Regina and Michael? Do you want them exposed to that lifestyle?"

He did after all have two other children to worry about and they lived in a small town, where everyone knew everybody else’s business. He convinced himself that they had made the right decision, but as time passed and he watched Regina withdraw from the family and Michael get involved with the wrong group of kids at school he regretted the decision more and more.

Looking back now over a decade later, he wondered how his family might have been different if Jeff was allowed to stay.

******

Jeff wandered down the hallway toward the kitchen. Behind him he heard Michael’s angry voice as he argued about something with his father. Crap! Why did I bother to come here?

He snapped his head around when he heard his mother’s voice from the kitchen.

"Caroline, can you help me with this?"

Silently, he cursed his cowardice. He dreaded this meeting with his mother ever since his father called him a month ago. What the hell do I say?

He took half a step toward the front door and stopped as he felt a surge of anger. No, dammit! You chased me out of the house once; I’m not going to let you do it to me again.

Jeff swallowed nervously, as the short walk to the kitchen felt it took like forever. He saw her from the doorway and stopped, absorbing the image of the woman who stood before him. She seemed smaller and less imposing than he remembered but all the same his heart still raced in his chest.

Her silvery hair was shorter and hung limply about the base of her neck as she bent over the open door of the oven. She struggled with the large roasting pan as she pulled it out and for a moment it teetered precariously in her arthritic hands.

"Caroline can you help me with this?" Her voice wavered as she struggled to control the weight of the pan as she lifted it from the oven rack.

"I got it." Jeff walked over, slid his hands around the potholders, and took the pan from his mother. Gingerly, he set it on the stove and then quickly stepped back away from her. "Hello, mother."

The emotions that crossed her face when she looked up at him were unreadable. The silence between them stretched on interminably.

"It’s you," she finally uttered, her face paling as she leaned heavily against the counter.

Jeff struggled between going to her and the memory of her outright rejection of him as her son so many years ago.

******

The moment passed and his mother turned away to pull a platter out of a cabinet.

"Your father said he called you."

Jeff couldn’t help feeling defensive, wondering, if his mother wished he hadn’t shown his face here today. "He asked me to be here."

"I know." She nodded in response as she went about the task of lifting the roast out of the pan. "You came alone," she commented quietly.

"I barely got myself here. Why would I want to subject Darryl to this?"

"Regina brought her friend with her."

He watched her shoulders stiffen at the remark and cringed at the harshness of her voice.

Jeff laughed and shook his head. "That’s how Regina is, Mom." She was always braver than I was.

"Darryl?" She glanced briefly over her shoulder at her son. "I thought that boy’s name was Tom."

Jeff leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. I’m surprised you even remember his name. "It was. Tom died ten years ago."

"Died? She finally turned and studied the young man standing in front of her. "He was so…young."

He saw the questions reflected back in her eyes and folded his arms. "Tom liked to live fast." ‘Die young and leave a good-looking corpse.’ It was Tom’s favorite come back whenever I asked him to stop using drugs and frequenting the baths.

"I…I’m sorry," she struggled to get the words out. "What happened to him?"

Jeff shrugged. You didn’t want to know about my life then, why should I allow you to have those pieces back now? "It’s a long story."

"I don’t mind."

With a sigh, Jeff spoke the words quickly, afraid that if he didn’t blurt them out he never would. "Tom was diagnosed with HIV a few years after we met."

His mother’s expression sobered as a heavy weight of uneasiness settled in her chest. Her voice trembled. "Jeff, before you say anything else, please, tell me you’re not positive."

Hazel eyes blinked and he stared down at the floor. "I wasn’t the last time I got tested."

His mother choked back a sob of relief and covered her mouth with a hand. "I’m sorry," she whispered and turned away from him. Still reeling from what he told her a moment ago, she clutched the edge of the sink with her hands.

Jeff stood at the table unable to approach her. What are you sorry about? You weren’t there. "Tom didn’t die of AIDS Mom. He took an overdose of drugs so he wouldn’t end up like some of his friends did."

"He killed himself?" Alice wiped her eyes and blew her nose loudly before she faced him again.

"We talked about it as he got sicker. It was what he wanted." Jeff glanced over at the hallway as Regina appeared in the doorway.

"Hi." She looked questioningly between her brother and mother. "Are you okay?"

Jeff blew out a breath and shrugged. "I was telling her about Tom."

"Oh." Regina stepped hesitantly into the kitchen and walked up beside her brother. She wrapped an arm around his waist and squeezed him affectionately.

"Did you know about him?" Alice looked at her daughter, realizing now, as she watched her two oldest children how little she knew about their lives.

Regina nodded her head. "I flew out to California for the funeral."

Their mother sighed heavily, her gaze somber as she regarded them. "I don’t pretend to understand your choice of lifestyles."

She wasn’t sure she could ever accept it. At moments when she least expected it, the words, ‘I’m gay’, still crushed her. Her own hypocrisy haunted her, knowing she had become in one moment of all-consuming and powerfully destructive rage, ‘one of those people’ who ostracized and condemned her own son.

By the time the magnitude of what she did finally broke through her ironclad defenses it was too late. The one time she spoke to Jeff on the phone it quickly spiraled down into an exchange of heated and angry words. The words ‘I hate you!’ followed by the dial tone of the phone, still woke her in the middle of the night.

"It’s not a choice, Mom," Jeff quickly protested.

His mother held a hand up. "I’m not going to debate what it is or is not. I just…I went through life believing that things would always be a certain way. I learned the hard way that they’re not."

"Mom," Regina whispered. She dropped her arms to her sides and gnawed on her lower lip as she watched the anguish in the older woman’s eyes.

"Don’t you think that if you weren’t…gay that you would be happier?" their mother stammered as she wrung her hands together, still keeping her distance from them. "Both of you?" She looked desperately between the two of them.

"No. I’d be miserable if I tried to act straight. Besides, if I did do that, I’d be lying to everyone, including myself." Jeff glanced anxiously at Regina. Feel free to jump in at any time, Sis.

"You didn’t teach us to be that way, Mom."

"I sent you away." She looked at her son and her lower lip started to quiver slightly.

Jeff ran his hands through his hair and looked away from her. He couldn’t bear to see his mother cry. "I told you to fuck off and die." His eyes met Regina’s and he swallowed nervously. "No, don’t you dare cry."

The blonde shook her head and covered her mouth with the back of her hand. "Too late."

"Damn you, Regina." Jeff acted on impulse and put his arms around his sister. They held on to each other not saying anything. He turned his head and stared at his mother through his own tears, then, slowly, he reached an arm out to her.

"I’ve missed you," she whispered as she walked toward them and wrapped her arms around her children.

Regina sagged into the embrace when she felt Jeff’s shoulders shudder as he let out a long held sob.

Chapter Sixteen

Regina stepped back out of her brother’s arms, content to let him stand there in their mother’s embrace. It had been so long, she started to believe that she would never see the day her brother would come home and be part of the family again. Not, that things would be normal after this brief interaction; there was so much damage that had to be undone from all the years of separation.

She watched as Jeff pulled out of his mother’s arms and cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable with the parental display of affection that had been absent from his life for so many years. "Um, isn’t there something you have to do with the roast before we eat? I already hear Regina’s stomach growling." He flashed an evil grin at his sister who smacked him in the arm in return.

Even after being apart for so long it was easy for them to fall back into their old habits of teasing each other mercilessly.

Alice sniffed and looked over at the counter. "I need to make the gravy. Regina tell your father to come help me in here."

In that single moment, the rare glimpse of the woman who her mother truly was slipped away. Her emotions efficiently reigned in and back under control.

Regina felt that if she breathed or blinked she would wake up and what she just experienced would be the quickly fading tendrils of a dream. Something she couldn’t grasp or hold onto to prove to herself that it was real. She wasn’t sure what she expected to happen but somehow this wasn’t exactly it.

Quietly, she left the kitchen and went in search of her father. I should be really happy that Mom was finally willing to have Jeff come home. So why do I feel this way?

"Dad?" She found him standing in the living room with a glass of scotch in his hand.

He cleared his throat before he answered her in a gravelly voice. "What?"

"Mom wanted you to come into the kitchen and help her."

He nodded and set his unfinished drink down on the bar. "I guess we’ll be eating soon. See if you can find Michael. I’m not sure where he went off to."

Regina sighed as her father walked out of the room. "Michael can find himself," she muttered irritably. She found herself suddenly miffed with him. Why didn’t he tell Caroline we were going to be here? What is that all about?

She felt someone watching her and raised her eyes to look out into the hallway. Alex was standing in the foyer with both hands tucked into the pockets of her denim jeans. There was concern etched in those incandescent, blue eyes as they studied Regina intently.

For all they had been through over the past few months, it was simple moments like this when Regina would find herself tumbling deeper in love with this woman.

Questioning eyebrows arched beneath dark bangs and the taller woman tilted her head slightly in response to the quiet smile that graced Regina’s features. "What’s happening?"

Regina had to shove her hands into her pockets to keep herself from wrapping her arms around Alex and indulging in a desperately needed hug. Her soul craved the contact but for now she let the gentle, reassuring voice fill the void.

"Everything and nothing." Regina tucked several strands of flaxen hair behind her ear, an unconscious gesture of her nervousness. "I think dinner is almost ready."

Alex stepped closer, watching the conflicting emotions warring in Regina’s eyes. She heard the angry voices before Regina left her father’s study and wondered what battle lines were being drawn between the family members.

"Regina?" Her mother’s voice coming from the kitchen broke the quiet reverie they shared.

"Yeah, Mom?" Regina’s eyes glanced nervously towards the kitchen.

"Come help Caroline carry these dishes out to the table."

"Be right there." Quickly, she stepped closer to Alex, took hold of her hand, and squeezed it. "Thank you for being here."

"Your welcome," the taller woman whispered back and brought the blonde’s hand to her mouth, briefly brushing her lips against the soft skin before she let her go.

******

Regina and her sister-in-law brought out the garlic, mashed potatoes and green beans while Jeff uncorked two bottles of wine in the kitchen.

"Here, Alex." Jeff walked over and held out a bottle of red wine for the brunette to take. "Sit by me an I promise to keep your glass full all night."

Alex gave him a wry, sidelong glance and shook her head. "Who drinks red wine?"

"Dad and Mike do." Regina took the bottle of white wine from her brother and started to fill the wine glasses on the table.

"So is it really going that badly?" Alex tilted her head closer to Jeff as she poured the burgundy liquid into the two remaining glasses on the table.

He caught sight of his younger brother walking toward them, carrying Zachary in his arms. "Let’s just say Mike would be just as happy if I fell off the face of the earth and died."

"Actually, it would have been fine if you’d stayed in California." Michael sauntered past his older brother and handed Zachary to his wife. He continued past her, pulled a highchair out of the corner, and set it down at the corner of the table.

Caroline set her mouth in a straight line of disapproval. "Michael it’s your mother’s birthday. Can’t you set your feelings aside for one day?" She settled Zachary into his seat and buckled him in. She lowered herself into a chair next to where Alex was standing on the other side of the table.

With a frown, her husband walked over to where Alex was standing and gave her an expectant look.

"Alex stay there. Michael you can sit across from me," she spoke firmly, without looking up at her husband.

Alex traded surprised glances with Regina as Michael walked stiffly to the other side of the table and pulled the chair out to sit down. The blonde shrugged her shoulders slightly when Alex continued to hold her gaze.

"It might be nice if you sat with your brother and sister since they are here." Caroline’s eyes bore steadily into his.

Michael started to retort but fell silent when Regina’s father carried the platter of meat into the dining room and set it in the middle of the table.

As if on cue, Zachary pounded his fists on the plastic tray in front of him and pointed at the food on the table.

"Spoken like a true Kingston," Jeff replied. It broke the tension in the room and even elicited a chuckle from his younger brother.

"Does mom need anymore help?" Regina offered quietly, stepping away from the table.

"No, she’ll be right here."

Jeff grabbed her sleeve and nudged his sister forward so that she was seated across from Alex and next to Michael. "I am not sitting next to him," he hissed fervently when Regina frowned up at him.

"Does everyone…have everything they need?" Alice walked into the room and hesitated as she took in the seating arrangements.

"Sit down, Mom. You’ve done enough already. It’s your birthday," Michael urged her.

"Nonsense. You know I like to cook," she responded, sitting at the head of the table across from her husband. Hesitantly, she let her gaze settle on her three children and took a deep breath before she spoke. "Well, I’m not sure I ever believed I would see all three of my children back home again."

Michael gave his father a dark, sidelong glance before he stared back down at his plate. "I don’t think any of us did, Mom."

Mercifully, the conversation faded as everyone filled their plates and began to eat. Only Zachary babbled on in blissful ignorance of the uneasiness in the room.

"So, Alex, do you watch any of those television shows about trauma or that one called ER?" Jeffrey asked in between mouthfuls of food.

The brunette swallowed and shook her head. "Not usually."

"How come?"

"They’re not entertaining to me." She sipped some wine and set her glass back down on the table.

She knew Jeff was trying to break the icy chill that seemed to have settled over the room and willingly obliged him in his efforts. "I see these people on the screen and my brain automatically starts to think about what’s wrong with them, the course of treatment and what is going to happen to them. Whether they’ll live or die." She gave him a wry smile. "I do that all day. I don’t want to have to worry about it when I go home."

"I didn’t think about that way."

Michael cleared his throat and looked at his sister. "So Regina, what happened with Derrick? Last I heard he was going to propose to you."

Regina almost spewed out the wine she just sipped from her glass and set her fork down on her plate. "Well, now that’s a quick way to kill my appetite, Michael. Thank you."

"Didn’t you say Derrick was going to ask her to marry him, Dad?" Her brother leaned forward and looked at their father.

"Michael, stop it." His father glared at him from the head of the table.

"Christ, would you have more couth, Mike?" Caroline hissed from across the table.

"What? I just want to know what happened." He shrugged and looked at her with a hurt expression on his face.

I’m so glad you all knew his intentions before I did. Regina glanced over at Alex who fixed her steely gaze on the blonde’s younger brother. "Derrick was a mistake," she stated.

"What do you mean a mistake?" Michael turned and put his hand on the back of her chair.

Regina’s father shook his head and stood up from the table. "Does anyone want more wine?"

Regina heard her mother sigh from her end of the table before she spoke firmly, trying to get him to back down. "Michael, I don’t want to get into this now."

Michael started to protest and then jerked in his chair. "Hey! What did you do that for?" He glared at his wife and reached down to rub his smarting shin.

"I can’t believe you’re behaving this way," Caroline stood up and unbuckled Zachary from his highchair.

"Where are you going?"

"He needs his diaper changed. I don’t suppose you would want to help. Would you?"

Regina took advantage of the opportunity, shoved her chair back, and quickly stood up. "I’ll go with you."

Caroline laughed. "Oh good, I’ll pawn the job off on you or maybe, Alex." She smirked and bit back another snort as the brunette coughed loudly and stared up at her in unabashed horror.

Michael rolled his eyes and sighed. "I don’t understand why women are so enthralled with this."

Regina smacked Michael in the arm. "Bite your tongue or I’ll tell Caroline how many times you woke up with a -"

She didn’t get a chance to finish the sentence as her brother’s hand clamped over her mouth. "Don’t you dare!"

Regina disengaged herself from her brother and stuck her tongue out at him. "You forget, I used to change your diaper."

Caroline smirked and then nudged Alex. "Come up with us."

I’m not getting out of this. Alex wiped her mouth with her napkin and shrugged as she looked across the table at Jeff. "Guess I’ll be back in a few minutes."

"No you won’t," Jeff sulked, knowing he was losing his one ally at the table.

"Lovely." Mike grumbled, as he watched the brunette saunter out of the room. "My son is up there with a couple of Lesbians."

"Michael, one of them happens to be your sister or doesn’t that count for anything?" Jeff snapped.

"Caroline doesn’t have a problem with it, but if it was just my decision I wouldn’t have them near him."

"God, you are such a bigoted pig!"

Alice looked at her son gravely. "Michael, it would suit you well to display some more temperance around your brother and sister."

With a look of irritation, her youngest son slumped back against his chair. "How can you say that after all the pain Regina and Jeff caused you?"

Jeff poured himself another glass of wine and drained half the glass in one swallow. Oh and I guess you never did anything to disappoint them! Did you?

With a thoughtful expression on her face, Alice rested her forearms on the table. "Zachary is barely a year old. Right now, he’s your ultimate joy and he’ll be the source of your greatest pain during your life, but you won’t ever stop loving him; no matter what he does."

There was silence for a moment, followed by the sound of a chair scraping back on the hardwood floor. Alice’s eyes followed her eldest son as he abruptly stood up, grabbed the bottle of wine, and hastily retreated from the dining room.

After a moment she stood up and sighed. "One day you’ll understand that, Michael. Hopefully, long before I did."

*******

Regina giggled as she stumbled up the stairs behind Caroline. "Oh, I think the wine went straight to my head."

Alex snorted and reached out a hand from behind to steady her lover. "You’re a little, lightweight aren’t you?" She straightened a picture the blonde had accidentally nudged out of place on her way up the stairs.

"I am not!" Regina declared as she turned around on the step and stared at Alex indignantly. "Actually, I think I’m just glad as hell to be out of that room," she continued in a softer voice as blue eyes widened slightly.

You can say that again. "Ditto," Alex whispered back.

She welcomed the brief respite from the turmoil that was brewing between Regina’s family members. Even though she knew Regina was quite capable of handling her brother, it still took a considerable amount of effort on her part not to reach across the table and smack Michael across the face for his obnoxious comments.

"Well, I have a rule," Caroline announced as she reached the top of the stairs with Zachary curled up in her arms.

"Rule?" Alex looked up at Regina’s sister-in-law. "Don’t you know rules are made to be broken?"

"Not this one." A smirk crossed Caroline’s face.

Alex arched one eyebrow and pursed her lips. "Why do I know that I’m not going to like this?"

"Regina you’re not changing Zachary’s diaper."

"B…but, hey!" the blonde complained loudly.

"I think Alex should do the honors." Caroline leaned against the wall and smiled cheekily at the taller woman.

"Oh no!" Alex pivoted and started back down the steps only to be grabbed from behind by Regina. "You’re the pediatrician, not me," the brunette protested loudly.

"What’s wrong, are you afraid of a little baby?" Regina teased her.

"Regina Kingston, you are in so much trouble." Alex twisted around to face her. " Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve changed an infant’s diaper? It’ll probably end up around the kid’s neck!"

"Too bad." Regina leaned forward and kissed the tip of Alex’s nose. "This, I have to see."

Alex tried one last ditch effort to plead for mercy. "Caroline, she’s not drunk. Honest. Besides, I do not do children."

"Well now, no time like the present to learn, is there doc?"

"Shit," Alex muttered in defeat as Caroline disappeared around the corner. With a resigned sigh, she trudged up the stairs, letting out a startled grunt as Regina smacked her playfully on her buttocks.

"Watch it." She turned and wagged a finger at the blonde.

"Oh, I am," Regina retorted and winked saucily at her.

Good thing your mother isn’t around. You might just give her a heart attack, Reg. Alex smacked her forehead in mock exasperation before she trotted up the remaining stairs to escape Regina’s wandering hands.

She stopped short just inside the doorway to Regina’s bedroom as Caroline held a diaper up in front of her. Alex stepped back and then stopped as two hands pressed firmly against the small of her back.

With a groan, Alex stepped into the room and looked dubiously at the blonde haired boy sitting cross-legged on the floor.

Ten minutes later, Alex sat sprawled on the carpeted floor of Regina’s bedroom with both her long, muscular legs stretched leisurely out in front of her. A self-satisfied smile graced her features.

"I can’t believe you did that!" Regina complained as she worked to undo the buttons on her shirt.

"Hey, you’re the one who leaned over when I was changing him." Alex’s blue eyes twinkled while she watched her partner strip off her cotton shirt and then tug a green sweatshirt over her head. I am in so much trouble, but I have to admit, it was pretty funny. She failed miserably, trying to stifle a snicker.

Regina turned and glared at Alex with her hands firmly planted on her hips. "Not one word, either of you."

Unable to resist the temptation, Alex gave Regina her most innocent look and gestured at herself. "What did I do?"

The blonde snatched a pillow from her bed and threw it across the room at Alex who deflected it easily. "Brat!"

Caroline cackled as she lay on her back on Regina’s bed, with both knees bent and Zachary perched, in his freshly changed diaper, on her lap. "Guess she forgot about what cold air does to little boys. Right, Zachary?"

In response, he raised both of his hands over his head and squealed in delight when his mother tickled his stomach.

Caroline looked at both of them and sighed. "I’m sorry Michael is being such a schmuck to both of you."

Regina waved her off and sat down on the floor next to Alex. "You shouldn’t be the one apologizing, Caroline. He’s known most of his life that Jeff and I were different. I guess I never realized how much of a problem he still has with us."

Her sister-in-law shrugged, her expression sobering. "Honestly, Regina, and I hate to say this because I love him to death. I think he’s afraid that if your parents accept Jeff back he’s going to lose the relationship he’s had with them."

"That’s insane. Why would he think that?"

Caroline crossed her legs and tilted her head back. "Regina you haven’t been home since you went to college. Michael never left. We got married two years after he graduated high school. He’s had your parents to himself all these years."

"Doesn’t he understand that after this weekend Jeff will go back to California? How much can change if he’s all the way on the other side of the country?"

Caroline rolled onto her side and cradled her son in the crook of her arm as she slipped off the bed and joined them on the floor. "I don’t know, Regina."

Zachary crawled over her legs and gurgled contentedly as he rocked back and forth on the floor as he decided what to do next. Intrigued by the shoelaces moving on Alex’s sneakers as she jiggled her feet, he began to creep toward her.

"Ga!" He tried several other variations on the sound, announcing his intentions to his audience.

Alex arched an eyebrow as Zachary stopped in front of her and knelt at her feet. He swayed slightly when he tried to stand up. With his arms spread wide he teetered and then lurched forward as he lost his balance and landed in a tangled heap on her ankles.

Brown eyes gazed up at her seriously and his lower lip quivered slightly.

"Yes, that would be gravity at work." Alex leaned forward and carefully lifted him off her legs and set him on the floor between Regina and herself.

With a displeased look on his face, Zachary shook his head and promptly crawled back up onto Alex’s lap.

"He likes you." Regina smiled as she watched her nephew climb over Alex’s legs. Zachary watched the blonde-haired woman as she reached over, and walked her fingers up his leg and then tickled his belly. He tilted his head back and giggled.

The taller woman snorted and folded her arms as the boy straddled her thighs, peering up at her curiously.

It was rare for her to feel comfortable around people she just met but Caroline had made her feel at ease since she met her out in the driveway. Maybe it was just the simple fact, that Regina’s sister-in-law seemed to take her relationship with Regina in stride and was unaffected by their obvious affection for each other.

She glanced over at her lover, feeling guilty about being at least partly responsible for getting Regina’s shirt messed up. She leaned in closer and whispered in her ear. "I’m sorry about your shirt. Don’t be mad at me. Please?"

Regina tilted her head back and arched an eyebrow as she gazed up at the sorrowful expression on her lover’s face. "Keep groveling."

The blonde tried to ignore the slumped shoulders, focusing instead on Zachary. When Regina caught the pout from the corner of her eye she knew she was done for. Penitent blue eyes met hers and a smile twitched at the corner of her lips. "I couldn’t stay mad at you even if I wanted to."

Alex gave her a relieved smile and draped one arm over Regina’s shoulders.

The three women looked up as the floorboards creaked outside the bedroom and Regina’s father peered into the room. He cleared his throat, his face coloring slightly as he took in the sight of his daughter leaning comfortably against Alex. "Ah, I thought this is where you all might be. Come downstairs so we can give Mom her presents."

"Okay, Dad we’ll be right down."

Caroline stood up and gathered Zachary in her arms. "Come here, little man. Let’s go get grandma her present."

Regina and Alex followed Caroline out of the room. At the landing of the stairwell, Regina hung back, waiting for her sister-in-law to disappear around the corner. When she did, Regina turned around and wrapped her arms snuggly around Alex’s waist. Her eyes closed and a smile touched her lips as strong arms embraced her and she rested her head against Alex’s chest.

"Mm, I needed that," she whispered, listening to the strong, rhythmic beating of Alex’s heart.

"Anytime," Alex replied and pressed her lips against Regina’s hair. "We should get down there before someone comes looking for us."

Regina squeezed her tightly, eliciting a small grunt from the taller woman. "I can’t wait until we go to Provincetown. I just want it to be you and me, Alex. No one else."

"That sounds wonderful," Alex replied and then ducked her head to kiss the blonde lightly on the lips.

Slowly, they released each other and walked down the stairs and into the living room where the rest of the family was already gathered.

"Where’s Jeff?" Regina asked, noting her brother’s absence.

"I think he went out for a walk after you girls went upstairs. I couldn’t find him," her mother replied quietly from her seat on the couch.

"I’ll see if I can find him." Regina glanced over at Alex and motioned her to come with her.

She was halfway to the front door when it swung open and her brother stepped through into the hallway, carrying an empty wine bottle with him. "Hiya, Reg." He waved the green bottle in her direction.

"Jeff, are you all right?"

"I’m fine." He weaved slightly as he walked towards the kitchen. "Hey, Alex. Where’d you go? I thought I was going to keep your wine glass filled all night."

"We went upstairs for a bit." Alex reached out and rescued the wine bottle before Jeff lost his grip on it as he staggered against Regina. "Whoa, easy there, Jeff. What did you have to drink?"

"Ah, let’s see. I had some scotch and some wine. Lot’s of wine." He squinted as he looked over at the brunette. "Wow, you have really beautiful, blue eyes."

Regina covered her eyes and groaned as her brother continued his best impression of a babbling idiot. "Jeff, you’re drunk."

"Well, I should hope so. I drank enough." He turned completely around, staggering against Alex as he lost his balance. "Did you get her the locket?"

"Shh, not so loud. I’m right here Jeff," Regina told him. Together the two women guided him into the kitchen.

Alex pulled out a chair and gently pushed Jeff into it. "Sit."

"Did you get Mom the locket?"

"Yes, I told you I was going to," Regina replied as she opened a cabinet. She pulled out a glass filled it with water, and handed it to her brother. "Drink this," she ordered, looking over her brother’s head at Alex, who was standing behind him with a wry expression on her face.

After a swallow he handed the glass back to Regina and pressed his head against her stomach. "I’m drunk," he slurred.

"No kidding, Jeff." Alex rolled her eyes and pulled Jeff against the back of the chair as he started to slump heavily against Regina.

"Jeff, are you going to be all right if I leave you for a few minutes?"

Her brother opened his eyes wide and then blinked several times, trying to focus on her. "Why wouldn’t I be?"

"I’ll stay with him," Alex offered.

"Thanks." Regina smiled at her gratefully before she left the kitchen.

Jeff swayed and leaned back in the chair, oblivious to the fact that his sister left the room. "Shit, I didn’t mean to get drunk. I’m sorry, Regina."

Alex patted his shoulder and pulled a chair out from the table so she could sit beside him. "Drink some more water."

Jeff took the glass that she held out to him and sipped the clear liquid. "Where’s Regina?"

"I think she went to give your mother her birthday present."

He frowned and struggled to stand up. "No, no she can’t do that."

"Jeff, sit down." Alex reached out to steady him as he staggered away from the table.

"You…don’t understand." He licked his lips and wiped his mouth as he braced himself against the doorframe. "Mom didn’t lose that…locket. Michael stole it from her jewelry box and smashed it to pieces with a hammer."

Alex stood up and walked over to Regina’s brother. "When did that happen?"

"I found him in the basement trying to put it back together the night I left home." Jeff looked away from her as he sucked his lower lip in and scowled, trying to hold back the tears that brimmed in his eyes.

"Jeff that was years ago."

In frustration Jeff slammed his fist into the wall. "We all chipped in to get it for her as an anniversary present. He’s going to think I’m trying to get back at him for getting me kicked out of the house."

"Do you think he’d honestly remember after all these years?" Alex walked over to him and stood by the doorway.

"I don’t know. I guess I should go in there." He looked sheepishly at Alex.

"I’m sure Regina would like you to be there with her." She clasped a hand on his shoulder as he turned and took several faltering steps toward living room. "Easy. Just lean against the wall."

In the doorway, they watched as Regina’s mother opened the rectangular box while Zachary sat cradled in her lap, playing contentedly with the wrapping paper.

"This is from both of you?" Alice asked in amazement as she removed the layer of white cotton and peered inside. "Oh…" She lifted the delicate gold chain up, watching as the locket spun slowly around in the air. "Oh, my." Her eyes darted between Regina and Jeffrey as her face flushed red with excitement.

"Well, look at that." Robert leaned forward and peered at the necklace, obviously pleased for his wife. "We never did figure out what happened to that locket."

"It’s beautiful." Alice handed Zachary over to her husband and awkwardly stood up, reaching out to embrace Regina. "Thank you," she whispered in Regina’s ear as she hugged her.

Jeff stared down at the oriental carpet as his mother turned and walked over to him. "Thank you, Jeff. It means so much to me."

The dark look he received from his brother as their eyes briefly met, answered his question about Michael’s obvious recollection. He closed his eyes as his mother embraced him, offering a silent prayer that his brother would keep his temper in check at least while they were in their parent’s house.

"Your welcome," he replied as he let her go and shoved his hands into his pockets. He leaned against the wall, fighting off a wave of lightheadedness, as his mother stepped away and walked back to her seat.

"What did you get Mom, Michael?" Regina’s question broke the awkward silence in the room.

"They’re going to stay at our place out on the Cape for a week in the fall."

"That’s a great time to go," Alex offered. "The weather is still nice but it’s not so crowded."

"Have you been out to there before, Alex?" Caroline asked, as she leaned over and picked up scraps of wrapping paper that Zachary had shredded.

"I own a small house out in Provincetown. That’s where Regina and I are going tomorrow."

"Oh, I remember going out there a couple of times with some friends when I was still in school."

"You never told me that!" Michael exclaimed as he twisted in his seat to stare at her.

"Yes, I did. You just don’t remember," Caroline laughed at his shocked expression. She reached over and squeezed his thigh. "Don’t worry, I only looked Honey."

"Oh, thanks a lot, Caroline." Michael stood up abruptly and walked out of the room, rudely shouldering his way past Alex and Jeff.

Caroline sighed and shook her head. "I guess I should go apologize to him."

"Apologize for what, bruising his delicate ego?" Jeff asked as she walked toward him.

"It’s a touchy subject for him. I guess I pushed him too far, joking about it." She patted Jeff’s arm as she walked past him to go find her husband.

Alice cleared her throat and stood up. "Does anyone want some coffee?"

"I don’t." Regina glanced over at Alex who shook her head.

"What about you, Jeff?"

"Huh? He lifted his head when he heard his name through his alcohol-induced fog. "No, that’s all right. I’m going to get some fresh air."

Jeff walked over to the closet and retrieved his coat. He struggled to shrug into it as he fumbled to open the front door.

"Here, let me get that." Regina walked over and opened the door for him. "Are you okay?" She laid a hand on his back and peered up into his glazed over eyes.

"Fabulous, Reg." He gave her a sidelong glance. "I just need to go outside."

"Give me your keys."

"What? I’m not going to drive anywhere," Jeff protested.

Regina held her hand out. "Don’t argue with me. Just give me your keys."

"Fine." Reluctantly, Jeff dug in his coat pocket and dropped them into her hand. "Feel better?" He pushed the outer door open and escaped outside.

Outside, he groped in his coat pocket for a pack of cigarettes. He found them, tapped one loose from the package, and captured it between his lips. He cursed softly at the nervous trembling in his hand as he tried and failed to get his lighter to work.

Behind him, Jeff heard the front door open and soft footsteps approached. "Need a light?" Alex asked as she walked toward him. She struck a match and cupped her hand around the fragile flame, protecting it from the wind that threatened to snuff it out.

"Thanks." Jeff sucked greedily on the end of his cigarette and inhaled deeply. "I keep trying to quit but I just can’t do it." He glanced back over his shoulder. "Where’s Regina?"

"She’s inside playing with Zachary."

"I’d offer you one, but it’s my last one," Jeff told her, as he crumpled the pack in his hand and shoved it into his jacket pocket.

"It’s all right. I used to smoke, but I try not to anymore."

"Lucky you. All this family stuff is making me crazy. You know?" He took a drag from the cigarette and puffed out two perfect rings. "I come home for the first time in seventeen years and they want to pretend like nothing happened."

Jeff held onto the railing as he made his way down the steps to the driveway.

"You think so? It seemed pretty awkward to me in there." Alex followed him and looked up at the dark expanse of sky.

Jeff swayed slightly as he stood, gazing out across the field. Alex’s ears picked up the crunch of gravel as someone walked along the edge of the driveway, coming from the corner of the house.

"See, Regina still wants to be a part of this family and that’s great. Me -" he tossed his arm up and waved his hand dismissively. "I don’t belong here. I haven’t for a long time."

Alex raised her eyebrows as he turned and looked up at her with a sad expression on his face. "Do you want to?" She watched as he flicked ashes from his half burned cigarette onto the gravel.

Before Jeff could answer another voice spoke up. "You’re right. You don’t belong here, Jeff." His brother stepped out from the shadows and stood on the edge of the driveway, half-hidden in the shadows.

"Where’d you come from?" Jeff frowned irritably at his brother.

Michael shrugged indifferently. "I didn’t feel like listening to Caroline, so I went for a walk."

God, I like you less every time you open you open your mouth, Alex thought as she looked back and forth between the two brothers. "I imagine you want to talk. I’ll leave you guys alone."

"You do that," Michael sneered at the taller woman.

The doctor shot him a dangerous look before she turned and climbed back up the stairs.

Michael watched the door close and then walked over to Jeff. "So did coming home live up to your expectations, bro?"

"I didn’t have any expectations, Michael." Jeff threw his cigarette on the ground and ground it out with the toe of his shoe.

"Sure you did. That was a nice touch with the pendant. I have to hand it to you, Jeff, you sure know how to manipulate Mom, even after all these years."

Jeff laughed caustically. "I knew you’d say that."

"Just go back to California. Nobody wants you here."

"No, you’re the one who doesn’t want me here, Mike." Jeff drew himself up taller and glared down at his brother.

"You’re right." Michael stepped closer and put his face inches from his brother’s. "I don’t want some faggot around my son."

Jeff stepped back away from his brother’s intimidating glare. "Don’t worry, we don’t start recruiting that young."

The vicious punch came out of nowhere and doubled Jeff over. He coughed and clutched his side as he tried to catch his breath. "Ah, Jesus," he groaned. "What the hell…did you do that for?"

His answer was another searing, blast of pain in his face and the metallic taste of blood that filled his mouth. Tears blurred his vision and he was aware of everything fading away as he stumbled onto his knees.

"That’s for coming back home." His brother’s words rang in his ears until he slumped forward in a heap on the cold ground.

Continued

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