I Found My Heart in
Osmosis
A gradual,
often unconscious process of absorption or learning
By SX Meagher
Part Three
Catherine picked up
the phone on Wednesday morning and was mildly surprised to hear her former
husband. “Hi, Cat,” Jim said, sounding happy.
“Good morning,
Senator. How are things?”
“Good. I’m thinking
about going to my
She almost pulled
the phone away from her ear to inspect it. “Get together?” she asked.
There was a pause,
then he said, “I … thought we were going to stay friends. We’re still parents
together.”
“I … of course I
want to be friends, Jim. But I suppose I haven’t given much thought to how that
would play itself out.”
“Friends see each
other and talk, don’t they?” he asked, his good humor ebbing.
“Of course. It’s
not that I’m averse to seeing you. You just caught me by surprise.”
He made a gruff
little noise that she’d heard thousands of times. She knew it meant he was
puzzled as to why he wasn’t getting his way, and she was a little pleased at
the thought that she didn’t have to give in to his wishes any longer.
“Maybe another time
then.”
“I’d be happy to
see you this time, Jim, but I’m not
going to be in town.”
“Oh.” A pause.
“Really?”
“Mmm-hmm. I’m going
to
“
She started to tell
him that was a little personal, but she realized she’d tell a woman friend—and
she should reveal as much to him as she would a casual friend. “I’m going to a
few galleries and to the spring art show at The Armory.”
“Oh … we did that
together a few times.”
“Yes, we did,” she
said, thinking that they’d always had a good time in
“Well, I don’t have
anything booked in
Now the warning
bells went off. She didn’t know what he wanted, but he definitely wanted
something. “That’s very thoughtful, Jim, but I’m meeting a friend.”
“A … friend?”
“Mmm-hmm.” She
didn’t add another word.
“So … you’re busy
all weekend?”
“Yes. I’m going for
the art, but also to see my friend.”
“Oh. Uhm … that’s
great. I hope you and … your friend have a good time.”
“I’m sure we will.
Now make sure you tell me the next time you’re coming to town. I’d like to show
you my new house.”
“Right … right.
That’d be nice. Have a good time and …well, just have a good time. Bye.”
“Bye, Jim. Take
care.” She hung up and sat for a minute, trying to figure out what he wanted.
But she couldn’t come up with a thing.
***
Ryan walked into
the waiting area of Ellen’s office and smiled tensely at Barb. They’d been unable
to use the room when they were in group, since the building was locked prior to
their early-morning session. But now that they were going to meet after the
usual group, they could relax in the waiting room. But Ryan wasn’t able to
relax, and she quickly wished they were outside again, since the silence was
much more pronounced in the small, quiet room. She was going to pick up a
magazine, but that seemed odd, so she laced her fingers around a knee and
rocked a little bit, knowing she looked nervous and uncomfortable.
“Do you wanna do
this?” Barb asked.
“No. You?”
“No. I hate
therapy.”
“Me too,” Ryan
said, feeling a little better at hearing Barb’s revelation. “I thought you were
into it. You always talk in group.”
Shrugging, Barb
said, “I wanna feel better. Sometimes it helped. But not enough.”
“Yeah,” Ryan said,
her expression thoughtful. “Same for me. It helped a little, but it didn’t help
enough to make me wanna keep coming.”
“So … why do this?”
“Mmm … I didn’t
wanna find a new therapist. And I promised my girlfriend I’d keep trying.”
“That’s not a very
good reason,” Barb said.
Even though her
words were frank, she didn’t sound like she was scolding Ryan. “You’re probably
right. But I hate this therapy stuff. It works great for some people, but I
don’t like to talk about things that upset me.”
“That’s kinda the
entrance requirement,” Barb said, smirking.
“I know. And I do try.”
“Do you really?
Doesn’t seem like it.”
Ryan thought for a
moment, then said, “You must be right. Ellen says the same thing. Maybe I’m an
underachiever.”
“You don’t look
like it,” Barb said. “And the stuff I read about you in the papers made you
sound like a super hero.”
Ryan laughed. “They
make an image for you. Whatever they think will make people buy the paper.”
Ellen opened the
door and beckoned them in. They made a few awkward moves to choose a place to
sit, and finally wound up next to each other on the sofa. Ellen took her usual
chair and said, “I heard you laughing in the waiting room. That’s a good sign.”
Barb smiled and
said, “We were talking about how neither of us really likes therapy. But we’re
still gonna do our best.”
“I didn’t say
that,” Ryan corrected, giving her a grin.
“I have confidence
in you both,” Ellen said. “I was thinking about how to start, and it doesn’t
make sense to have you tell your stories again. If you’re willing, I’d like to
try something a little different. I think we all agree we want to get a little
deeper than we did in the group.”
“I don’t wanna, but
I know I have to,” Ryan said.
Barb nodded and
Ellen continued, “Why don’t you each tell me what you know about the other. Why
she’s here, what’s really stopping her from living life to the fullest?”
“You want me to
tell you about Barb?” Ryan asked, looking puzzled.
“Yes. I don’t want
you to analyze her. Just say what you’ve learned about her. I think it’s a way
to let you each see what you’re projecting.”
“I’m willing,” Barb
said. “I was kinda doing that in the waiting room.”
Ryan smiled at her.
“Go ahead.”
“Okay.” Barb pursed
her lips, her eyes narrowed. “I think Ryan feels angry. Mostly at herself. I
think she’s got really high standards that she sets for herself, and when she
doesn’t meet ‘em, she beats herself up.”
“True,” Ryan said,
nodding.
“I think she’s also
scared. Probably that she’s not able to take care of the people she loves. This
whole thing probably made her realize how powerless she is. Nobody likes to
face that.”
Ryan didn’t nod
this time. She folded her arms over her chest and leaned against the arm of the
sofa.
“She’s said that
she feels bad that she didn’t act earlier and kill the guy who was driving the
car. But I don’t think that’s true,” Barb said, glancing at Ryan. “I think she
feels guilty about having anything to do with a guy dying. Even though he
deserved to. Twice.”
It didn’t take long
for Ryan’s reserve to shatter. Tears were rolling down her cheeks by the time
Barb finished talking. Ellen held out a box of tissues and Ryan took the first
of many she would use in the next forty minutes.
***
A full hour hadn’t
passed, but Ryan felt like she’d been on the sofa for a week. Her body felt so
heavy and lethargic that she wasn’t sure she’d be able to stand up. Ellen
escorted them out and they stood outside the door for a second before Ryan
impulsively put her arms around Barb and hugged her. “You get it,” she
whispered. “You’re the only person I’ve talked to who gets it.”
“Yeah, I do,” Barb
said, returning the hug. “It’s awful, isn’t it?”
“The fucking
worst.” Ryan laughed ruefully. “I used to feel like I’d been hit with a stick
after a session. Now I feel like I’ve been beaten with a belt. I guess that’s
progress.”
***
Luckily, Jamie was
at class when Ryan got home. Ryan had a long list of things she needed to
accomplish, but she couldn’t bear to even look at her day-planner. She kicked
off her shoes and lay down on the bed fully clothed, falling asleep in minutes.
***
Jamie was walking
across campus, headed for the library when her cell phone rang. “Hello?” she
said after wrestling it out of her pocket.
“Hi, Jamie?”
“Yeah?”
“It’s Ray
Wisnewski. A couple of new properties came on the market this week and Niall
said you might be able to come look at them.”
“Oh, he did, did
he?” She laughed, shaking her head.
“Is … that okay? I
don’t really know who I should be dealing with here.”
“Oh, it’s fine that
you call me, Ray. We’ve got a whole crew and everyone acts like the boss until
it’s time to actually make a decision. But don’t let that put you off. We
usually argue amongst ourselves and not in public.”
“To be honest, I
don’t recall ever working with a group as large as yours where there wasn't one
or two decision makers.”
“Hmm … maybe you
should just call me. I’m not particularly knowledgeable about any of the rehab
issues, but I think I know enough about the neighborhood to know if something
is worth looking at. And, to be honest, my schedule is the most flexible.”
“Great! That’s one
hurdle down. Do you have time to come today?”
“Sure. I was going
to study, but that’s never any fun. I can be there in an hour. Is that okay?”
***
The visit to
***
After a two-hour
nap, Ryan woke up feeling better—lighter—than she had in days. She still felt
emotionally bruised, but she had to admit that talking to someone who really,
truly understood how she felt—and how guilt was consuming her—would eventually
help. If it didn’t kill her first.
***
That evening Jamie
struggled down the stairs with her traveling bag, scowling at Ryan who was
sitting placidly on the couch, reading a book. “Thanks for the help!”
“I’m sorry,” Ryan
said, looking anything but. “Did you ask for help? I must not have heard you.”
“A really good
girlfriend would have jumped to her feet the minute she heard me hit the first
stair.”
“See? I’ve been
telling you I’m not a good girlfriend. I always know best.” She got up and took
the bag from Jamie, helpfully relieving her of her burden for one step.
Jamie stayed on the
first step and grabbed Ryan’s collar, holding her still. “I’ve never criticized
your kissing, so get busy.”
Dutifully, Ryan put
her hands on Jamie’s hips and spent a moment looking into her eyes. “Sometimes
I wish you were taller. It’s nice being able to look at you without bending.”
“Hey, you could be
shorter. I’m not crazy about having to stretch to get a kiss.”
A silly look
settled on Ryan’s face. “We could work with what we have.” She stood next to
Jamie on the step and started to kiss the top of her head, making ridiculously
enthusiastic sounds while she rubbed against her. Jamie followed suit, making
smacking noises against the point where Ryan’s clavicles met. They were both
giggling when Ryan pulled away. “I’d rather bend,” she said, jumping back down to
the floor.
“And I’d rather
stretch. Your mouth is much more responsive than your sternum.”
Grasping her hips
again, Ryan once more studied Jamie’s eyes. “It’s weird to be going to the same
state, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. This is a
first, isn’t it?”
“I think so. I’m
glad we’ll only be apart one night. I don’t even know how far
“It must not be too
far if you’re taking a bus after your game.”
“Don’t be so sure.
The athletic department doesn’t throw money away. I didn’t bother to check the
schedule. For all I know it’s a twelve hour ride.”
“You hate buses,
don’t you?”
“Yeah. It’s
impossible for me to get comfortable. Buses were made for people your size.”
Jamie put her arms
around Ryan’s neck and clasped her hands. “This step was made for people my
size to get a kiss. What’s with the holdout?”
“Nothin’. I just
like looking at you. I never have enough time to just look at you.” She brushed
her fingers across Jamie’s forehead, fluffing her hair. “You’re such a beautiful
woman.”
Jamie smiled and
looked into Ryan’s eyes, searching them for clues about her state of mind. She
couldn’t read anything, so she asked, “How’re you feeling about going? Okay?”
Ryan nodded. “Yeah.
I’m fine. Really fine. See?” She smiled so brightly and artificially that Jamie
had to laugh.
“That’s a beauty.”
She kissed Ryan’s smiling face. “When’s your flight?”
“Not sure. I just
know I have to be on the bus in two hours.”
“You’ve gotten very
laid-back about your travel plans, buddy. That’s not like you.”
“Yeah, it is. When
I’m on a team I just do what I’m told. It’s like the military. Don’t ask,
’cause they don’t tell ya much.”
“Well, I’ve got to
go now. Give me enough kisses to last until tomorrow.”
Ryan gave her a
dramatically lovesick look. “Not possible. No matter how many I give you, I’ll
still want more.”
“Then stop talking
and start kissing!”
***
Mia came barreling
out of their room and threw her arms around
“I shouldn’t feel
so good,”
“Ooo … that’s
because you’re my sweet, generous girl. You don’t like to see someone else
suffer.”
“No, I really
don’t. But at this point—it’s her or me. And I don’t want it to be me!”
***
Bright and early
the next morning, Mia set out to start looking for apartments. She’d used the
Internet and the local free paper, and had a list of ten buildings to check
out. Her list of “musts” was short, since her main goal was to be away from
their roommates. But if they were going to move, it only made sense to live
close to the Olympic Training Center. So Mia concentrated her search to a three
mile circle around the Center.
The first three
buildings didn’t merit getting out of the car for. But the fourth one was
decent enough, so Mia parked and went looking for the building manager. It took
her a few minutes, since the place was fairly large, but she eventually found
the office and buzzed. She entered an apartment turned office and smiled at the
woman behind a desk. “Hi. I’m looking for an apartment.”
The woman didn’t
smile back. In fact, she didn’t look up. “Student?”
“Uhm … no,” Mia
said, figuring that was the correct answer given the tone in the woman’s voice.
“How many
bedrooms?”
“Ahh … a one
bedroom, I guess.”
The woman idly
looked through a large book, and said, “Interior, first floor, $450. And View,
third floor, $650.” She finally lifted her head and met Mia’s eyes.
“Interested?”
“Uhm … sure. Can I
see the cheaper one?”
The woman chortled
to herself and said, “Everybody wants the cheaper one.” But she hauled herself
to her feet and grabbed a huge key ring before leading Mia to the apartment. It
was, as advertised, on the interior. But the way the building was designed
meant there wasn’t a hint of sun in the unit.
“Does it get sun in
the afternoon?” Mia asked.
The woman pointed
at the window. “That’s East.”
Mia waited
patiently until it became clear that was the entire statement. Luckily, she
knew the sun set in the West, so an East facing apartment would be bright in
the morning—which it now was. She went to the window in the living room and saw
that the sun was hitting the upper floors, but couldn’t reach far enough to get
to the first floor.
“The unit on the
third floor gets sun all day. It’s on a corner, so it gets a cross-breeze,
too.”
Mia was tempted,
but she couldn’t ask
“You’re not gonna
find a nicer place for $650,” the woman said. “Two hundred bucks isn’t that big
of a deal. Cut back on something else.”
“I’m living on $800
a month,” Mia said, the number seeming even smaller when she heard it come out
of her mouth. “I’d have to cut out eating.”
“Can’t have everything,”
the woman said, laughing at her own joke.
***
The next place
looked promising. Too promising to Mia’s view. It was very close to a nice
business district, there were small restaurants and bookstores all around, and
a $1.00 movie theatre just a block away. And the building looked better
maintained than the last place. So she was sure she wouldn’t be able to afford
a decent place, but she rang the bell anyway.
A gruff-looking man
answered. “Help ya?”
“Yeah. I’m looking
for an apartment. An inexpensive apartment,” she added.
He smiled. “That’s
what everyone’s looking for. We just have different ideas of what inexpensive
means.”
Mia smiled back.
“I’m looking for a one bedroom, and I’d love to have some light.”
He nodded his head
in the direction of the elevator. “I’ve got just what ya want. Just learned
about it yesterday.” She followed him to the elevator, and they went to the
third floor. He opened the door, and she was struck with the smell of … she
twitched her nose and decided it was either incense or a strange variety of
pot. “These guys will be out in two weeks. It’s not due for painting, but I
think we’re gonna have to re-carpet.”
She looked down at
the floor and saw stains that she couldn’t begin to identify. “Yeah. I think
that’s a must.”
“Young guys tear a
place up faster than a pack of wild dogs,” he said, with a surprising bit of
amusement in his voice.
The unit was
flooded with light, and it was big, much bigger than she would have guessed.
The bedroom was jammed, but when she realized there were two futons and a
full-sized bed she realized just how big it was. The kitchen was much bigger
than their current one, although she wasn’t sure it would ever be usable again,
given the cans, bottles, take-out containers and pizza boxes that covered every
surface, including the floor. “It could use a little cleaning,” she said,
unable to stop herself from making a face.
“And people wonder
why they get roaches,” he said, laughing. “One bunch like this and I’ve got the
whole line complaining about roaches and mice.” He shrugged. “What can I do?
Clean everybody’s apartment?”
“No, I guess not.
You didn’t tell me how much this was.”
“These guys are
paying $450,” he said, smiling when Mia’s eyes opened wide. “If I clean it up
right and re-carpet I could easily get $550. But …” He paused, looking at her
carefully. “You seem like a nice kid. How many people?” His eyes narrowed. “Be
honest.”
“Two,” she said,
holding up a pair of fingers. “Two women. Clean women.”
“Which means two
boyfriends,” he said.
“No, no boyfriends.
We’re … partners. Life partners.”
He looked a little
surprised, but he nodded agreeably. “You two party much?”
She laughed. “Not
at all. We’re in bed by 9:00 almost every night.”
“Okay. I assume
you’re bullshitting me, but you look clean. I’ll let you have it for the same
price for six months, then $500 for the rest of the lease.”
“That seems like a
good deal,” Mia said. “Too good if you know what I mean. What’s the catch?”
“No catch. I don’t
like to screw with people, so I’ll tell you the truth. We’ve got a lot of
Section 8 housing here.”
“Section 8?”
“Welfare,” he said.
“A lot of single mothers with kids. So it can be noisy. We also have a lot of
students. Our tenants turn over pretty quick. And we have to keep the security
deposit on most of ’em to repair the damage. So this isn’t the place for a
person who’s lookin’ for quiet and considerate neighbors.”
“But the apartment
is nice,” she said, looking around again. “And big.”
“Yeah, it is. It’s
a good deal for the money.”
“Can I bring my
girlfriend over tomorrow to see it?”
He made a face and
started to say no, but he hesitated for just a moment then said, “Early?”
“We’re up by 5:30.
How early do you want us here?”
***
Jamie stood on the
18th green and tried to look interested, but Juliet was having the
worst game Jamie had ever seen her have, and her mind had started to wander at
about the 6th hole. Juliet looked like she’d been eating sour
grapes, and Jamie knew that she was furious with herself, but Jamie didn’t have
much sympathy for her. Once she’d realized that Juliet was really a jerk, she’d
let her drop off her radar screen. Now she didn’t bother trying to talk to her
or even acknowledge her presence.
After what seemed
like twenty minutes, Juliet finally putted out, ending the match. Jamie shook
hands with their opponents and started to walk toward the trailer where the
tournament officials were collecting the scorecards. It took just a few moments
to read off her scores and sign her card, and she was heading for the clubhouse
when a young man caught her attention.
“Hey! Excuse me,”
he said. He pointed toward a woman loaded down with cameras and lenses. “We’re
with the ASU newspaper. Could we get a picture of you?”
Jamie looked over
her shoulder, then back at the duo. “Me?”
“Yeah. We wanted a
photo of your foursome. Melissa Walker shot the lowest round today.”
Melissa was a
student at ASU, so it made sense they’d want her, but Jamie was puzzled. “Why
the foursome? Why not just her?”
He frowned. “It
won’t take long. My editor likes to have a lot of shots to choose from.”
“I don’t mind,”
Jamie said. “Just wondering.” Juliet walked out of the scorer’s trailer and
Jamie smirked at the thought of what the reporter would have to do to get her
to stop.
The persistent staffer
jogged in front of Juliet and gave her the same pitch he’d given Jamie. Juliet
obviously thought he wanted a picture of just her, because she smiled and said,
“Sure. Any time.”
Oh. She’s in her “I’m gonna be a big star on
the LPGA tour” mode. No wonder she didn’t kick him in the crotch.
The reporter led
her over toward Jamie, and Juliet’s smile faded instantly. The photographer
rounded up the other two women and they stood there awkwardly for a moment as
the photographer set up the shot. “Was this your idea?” Juliet muttered just
loud enough for Jamie to hear.
“Yeah. I’m so crazy
about you that I’d do anything to get a picture of us together.”
Melissa heard Jamie
and she tried, unsuccessfully, not to look shocked.
The photographer
said, “Can you all look like you just finished your round? Shake hands or
something.”
Jamie played along,
reaching out to shake the hand of the golfer from Texas A&M. Much to
Jamie’s surprise, Juliet also did as she was asked.
A series of
pictures was snapped, but the photographer wasn’t finished with them. She said,
“This time I want the
Jamie saw the color
drain from Juliet’s face and knew she was gone. Without a word, Juliet walked
away, not pausing when both the photographer and the reporter called out to
her. Still smiling, albeit falsely, Jamie stood there, waiting to see if they
wanted to take a different picture.
The photographer
looked a little puzzled, then said, “I guess I’ll just take a couple shots of
Melissa. Thanks.”
The reporter walked
over to them and asked for their names. The woman from
“Why? Because of
Juliet?”
“Is that your
teammate’s name? She really looked pissed.”
“Oh, don’t worry
about it. She’s … like that.”
He looked
completely befuddled. “Like what?”
Jamie wasn’t sure
why things had gotten to her, but her patience was shot. She looked at the man
and asked, “Off the record?”
“Uhm … sure.”
“She’s an ass …
hole.”
His eyes grew wide,
then he smiled. “She seemed like one.”
“One of the
biggest.”
“Oh. Can I have
your names if they use that picture?”
Jamie paused, then
said, “Just say ‘unidentified
***
Jamie answered her
cell phone on the way to dinner. Caller ID showed it was Ryan, and she said,
“Hey, good lookin’. What’s the good news?”
“Got our asses
handed to us again,” Ryan said, sounding disgusted. “We can’t buy a run! We’re
in such a slump, Jamers. Nothing Coach does seems to help.”
“That’s ’cause he
hasn’t put you in.”
“Ha ha. Takes more
than one person. The whole team’s not able to hit the broad side of a barn.
Pisses me off.”
“Well, we came in
thirteenth place today.”
“In the PAC-10?
How’d you do that?”
“You’re too funny.
There were fifteen teams. And two of them suck more than we do!”
“I’m sorry, babe.
Are you upset?”
“No, not really. I
did pretty well.”
“Cool! How’d you
play?”
“Got a
seventy-three. I came in twenty-eighth.”
“Wow,” Ryan said,
thinking twenty-eighth wasn’t anything to brag about. “Good for you.”
“Led the team … not
that that’s much to crow about. We’re in a slump, too. Juliet had an
eighty-one. I thought she was gonna break her clubs.”
“She’s an asshole,”
Ryan said, having never changed her mind about Juliet’s worth.
“Yeah, she is.”
Jamie quickly decided to tell Ryan about Juliet’s snub later in the evening.
“You oughta hit her
with a nine-iron.”
“Just my style. But
not a bad idea. When will you be here? Soon?”
“Nope. We just
finished. The bus isn’t gonna leave for an hour, and then we’re gonna stop for
dinner. We’ll probably get to
“You know I will,
but thanks for the offer. I hope your bus ride isn’t too bad.”
“It’s only about
two hours. I’ll be fine. Have a good evening, babe.”
“Love you. See you
later.”
***
Walking into the
dining room, Jamie saw her usual place waiting for her. Lauren and Samantha,
the two shy freshmen, waved at her and she joined them. As always, she talked
while the two younger women smiled at everything she said. Juliet was eating by
herself, but one of the assistant coaches sat with her. Jamie figured he was
trying to cheer her up, but she could have told him not to bother. When Juliet
played badly, she was unmerciful with herself.
Juliet finished
gulping down her food, and she walked right by Jamie’s table, not making eye
contact with anyone. Lauren shot her a look, then cocked her head toward Jamie.
“Does Juliet dislike us?”
“Dislike you? No!
No way!”
“But she doesn’t
talk to us, Jamie. She hardly says hello when we’re paired with her. It really
makes it hard. We’re supposed to be a team.”
Lauren looked so
earnest that Jamie’s anger toward Juliet flared. It was tough, but she managed
to say, “She’s very self-involved, Lauren. Golf means an awful lot to her, and
she doesn’t really think about anything else when she’s playing.” Like being polite!
***
It wasn’t usually
easy to get to Jamie. But once someone did, she was well-gotten. And Juliet had
definitely gotten to her. As soon as dinner was over, she got onto the elevator
and went directly to Juliet’s room. She knocked briskly and a minute later
heard an, “I’m busy.”
That didn’t help
her mood. More determined than ever, Jamie knocked louder. Juliet didn’t bother
to answer, so Jamie kicked the door loud enough to have someone down the hall
open his door and glare at her. “Forgot my key,” she said, trying to smile.
“Heavy sleeper.” The man shook his head and went back inside, and Jamie said
loudly, “I’m not leaving. So you can open it, or I can stand out here and
scream at you.”
The door flew open.
“Fuck you,” Juliet said lethargically, turning her back on Jamie and walking
over to one of the beds to lie down.
Jamie sat down on
the other bed, staring at Juliet who was staring at the television. “Why’d you
act like such a jerk today?”
Not turning to look
at her, Juliet said, “I didn’t do anything. I just didn’t want to stand there
and have some idiot take my picture.”
Letting her comment
hang in the air for a moment, Jamie said, “Bullshit. You didn’t leave until she
asked you to pose with me.”
“Don’t flatter
yourself. They didn’t want our pictures; they were just trying to show some of
the chumps Melissa beat.”
“Mmm … Then why’d
you let them take the first picture?”
Juliet turned
toward the window, letting her eyes wander idly. “Why not? It only took a
second.”
Jamie sat there for
a moment wondering what sequence of events helped turn Juliet into such a mess,
but her anger was greater than her sympathy. “The reporter and the photographer
were really shocked when you walked away. But I told ’em a little bit about you
and they understood.”
Whirling, Juliet’s
feet hit the ground and she was inches from Jamie’s face. “What did you say?”
Jamie could see the
veins in her throat pulsing, and she got a little thrill from upsetting Juliet.
“Not much. I told them you were an asshole to everyone and that it wasn’t
personal.”
“You what?”
“I told them the
truth, Juliet. You’re an asshole, and you only care about yourself.”
Jumping to her
feet, Juliet stormed over to the window and kicked the wall. “God damn it! My
image is critical!”
“Oh, please! You
only care about your image if you think someone can help you. You’re one
messed-up chick. I don’t know how you got so screwed up, but someone’s
convinced you of some strange shit.”
“What in the fuck
are you talking about?”
“Your so called
‘image’ means so much to you that you make yourself look like an idiot to keep
people from guessing your deep, dark, awful secret.”
Juliet’s eyes were
nearly ablaze with anger. It seemed that the angrier she got, the quieter her
voice became. “What are you hinting at?”
“I’m not hinting at
anything, I’m stating it. You’re a l-e-s-b-i-a-n. A dyed-in-the-wool dyke.”
Juliet looked like
Jamie had accused her of being into bestiality. “I am not!”
“You admitted to it
after you tried to kiss me. Don’t tell me you forgot!”
“I’m not a real
lesbian,” she said, grinding her teeth. “I just … I said I had … that I
wouldn’t ever …”
“Juliet,” Jamie
said, trying to inject some concern into her voice, “no one cares. No one’s
interested enough to care. If you’d just live your life, you could have a
girlfriend and no one would give a fuck. But you’re so homophobic that you’d
rather be miserable and paranoid.”
“Oh, right. Look
who’s talking! People in
“My situation was a
little unique. But I wouldn’t change things even if I could. I’d rather have
everyone in the world know than try to hide who I am. I did that before, and it nearly drove me crazy.”
“I … am … not … a …
lesbian!”
Jamie had to laugh.
She couldn’t keep the mocking tone from her voice; she wouldn’t have, even if
she’d been able. “Okay. You’re not a lesbian. You’re a nice, normal, straight
girl who tried to get me into bed. That’s what all the straight girls do.” She stood up and got right in Juliet’s
face. “I’ve been there. I’ve done that. You can’t bullshit me.”
“I told you about
some … feelings I had, and now you try to use what I said against me!” Her
cheeks flushed and it looked like she was going to cry, but she held it in.
“Get out of my way,” Juliet said.
Her voice was so
cold, it startled Jamie. She stepped back and watched Juliet nearly run out the
door. Before the furious woman got out the door, Jamie started to feel guilty.
She knew that Juliet deserved to have her butt kicked, but she still had some
sympathy for a woman who was in such a total state of denial. She noticed both
room keys lying on the dresser, so she picked one up and went downstairs,
assuming she’d find Juliet somewhere on the first floor.
***
There were still a
few players lingering over dinner, but none of them had seen Juliet. Jamie was
just leaving when Samantha walked in.
“Hi,” she said when
she saw Jamie. “What’s wrong with Juliet?”
“Uhm … why?”
“I saw her leave
the hotel a couple of minutes ago. She looked really, really mad.”
“Did you see where
she went?”
“No. She just
started walking. But I don’t know where she could have gone. There’s nothing
around here except gas stations.”
Jamie patted her
shoulder. “Thanks. I’ll go take a look. Maybe she just went out for some
snacks.”
“Maybe. But she
looked like she was gonna punch somebody.”
Jamie didn’t
mention that she was the intended target. She went outside and scanned the
parking lot, but didn’t see anyone. There were a couple of gas stations across
the four lane highway, but Jamie didn’t think Juliet could get across the road
without being run over. And there was nothing on their side of the highway for
as far as Jamie could see. So she sat down on a bench at the corner of the
building, deciding to wait Juliet out. If
she’s not back in an hour, I’ll tell Scott.
***
Just under the hour
limit, Juliet walked across the parking lot, heading for the front door. “Hey!”
Jamie called out.
Juliet gave her a
brief glance and kept going.
“I’ve got your room
key. You left both of them.” Jamie could see the heavy sigh leave Juliet’s
lungs. She approached rather tentatively and held out her hand. Jamie pulled
the key from her pocket, but didn’t offer it up. “I’m sorry for the things I
said.”
“Sure you are.”
“I believe them,”
Jamie clarified, “but I know you don’t wanna hear them. And it’s none of my
business how you live your life. If you wanna build a nuclear bomb-proof
closet—go right ahead. I just know how lonely it is.”
Surprising Jamie,
Juliet flopped down next to her on the bench. “You don’t know anything,” she
said, sounding tired.
“I really do. I
know what it’s like to have feelings that you’re afraid of. I know what it’s
like to be terrified of disappointing people. I get that,” she said earnestly.
“I have …” Juliet’s
mouth tightened. “I have a problem with alcohol. When I drink, I do crazy
things. That’s why I … did whatever I did to you. I don’t remember it, so I
can’t really know what I was thinking, but I’m sure I was just out of my mind.”
“Alcohol lowers
inhibitions; it doesn’t make you into a different person.”
“What are you, a
psychiatrist? You don’t know me, and you don’t know what was going on in my
head. For all I know, you were hitting on me! Maybe you just came up with this
story to … convince your girlfriend you didn’t start it!”
Jamie’s anger had
faded and she didn’t have the desire to continue the argument. She laughed
softly. “Yeah. That’s probably it. I’m always trying to think of ways to cheat
on Ryan.”
“I don’t know how
you people behave. You might fool around with anyone who’ll let you.”
“Yeah, we do,”
Jamie said, smiling agreeably. “All of the stories you’ve heard are true. We’re
like wild dogs. My favorite trick is to go to someone’s house and get so drunk
she has to take me home. Then, when I get her into my room, I try to hump her.
Oh, wait! That’s what you did!”
“I didn’t do that!
You must have been drunk if that’s what you thought!”
“Nope. I wasn’t
drunk. But even if I had been, I wouldn’t have hit on you.”
Stung, Juliet drew
back, looking like Jamie had hit her.
“I didn’t mean it
that way,” Jamie said. “I just mean that I’m happy and fulfilled in my
relationship. Even though you probably find it hard to believe, lesbians can be
happy.”
“Whatever,” Juliet
said, trying to look like she didn’t care. “I only want to make sure that
people don’t associate me with you. I’ve got to make sure sponsors don’t think
I’m gay, because even though you don’t have much contact with the real world,
people still want to sign straight women to endorsement contracts.”
Once again, Jamie
couldn’t stop herself from laughing. “And what kind of endorsement contracts do
you think you’re gonna get?”
“What’s that
supposed to mean?” Juliet snapped.
“You heard me. Who
do you think’s gonna sign you?”
“The usual—a
resort, a ball company, a shoe company. Maybe a watch or a car manufacturer.”
“And why would they
do that?”
“Are you stupid?”
Juliet asked. “They sign people who they think present a good image and make
people want to buy their products.”
“I’m not stupid,”
Jamie said, feeling her temper flare again. “And you’re no Anna
Kournikova. You’re a decent looking
woman, but no one’s gonna sign you to make you an X-rated screensaver.”
“You’re such a
bitch!”
“And you’re
delusional! The only way for you to get endorsement contracts is to play well.
Really, really well. You’re never going to get signed because you’re sizzling
hot, Juliet, so the only thing … truly the only thing that matters … is how
well you play. So stop your ridiculous paranoia and focus on your game! My
guess is that you screwed up today partly because you were paired with me.”
“Don’t flatter
yourself.”
“While I was
sitting out here, I was thinking about your play and it dawned on me that you
have a shitty round every time we’re paired. I think you’ve got half of your
brain on your game and half on making sure no one thinks of me when they see
you.”
“Do you blame me?”
Juliet jumped to her feet. “You’ve been on the cover of every tabloid in the
country! Everywhere we go, people follow you just to see the woman they saw
every night on TV. I don’t wanna be associated with that!” She was so upset she
was panting, and she stepped back just enough to lose her balance on the
sidewalk. She started to wave her arms to right herself.
Jamie jumped up and
grabbed her flailing hand. But Juliet was too far gone and she started to fall.
Jamie should have let go, but she tried to pull her back—only to have the
heavier, taller woman pull her down on top of her. Seeing that she was going to
fall, Jamie pushed off the sidewalk, trying not to land on Juliet. It seemed
like everything was in slow motion. Jamie knew she was going to hit the ground,
but her feet still tried to come down first. They didn’t. She felt her right
arm hit the ground, then her chin hit her chest. She knew her legs were on
something soft, and she assumed that softness was Juliet, but she couldn’t make
herself move. Everything seemed very quiet, and her brain didn’t accept that
she’d fallen. It was very much like a movie that she wanted to rewind, but she
didn’t quite know how.
“Oh, shit!”
Juliet’s voice
sounded far away, and isolated—like it was the only sound besides the pounding
of blood that was throbbing in Jamie’s ears. Struggling to move, Juliet got
hold of Jamie’s hips and tried to push her, but as soon as her body moved,
Jamie felt a jolt of pain in her arm that made her scream. “Don’t! Don’t touch
me!”
“You’re lying on
me! Get off, God damn it!”
“Don’t move me!”
Jamie cried. “I’m hurt!”
“I’m hurt too and
you’re making it worse!” Ignoring Jamie’s protests, Juliet again tried to slide
out from under her hips.
“Stop!” Jamie
cried. “God damn it. Stop!”
A security guard
saw them and ran across the parking lot. “What’s going on?” he demanded.
“We fell,” Juliet
said. “And she can’t get off me.”
“Are you two
drunk?”
“No!” Juliet
snapped. “Help get her off me!”
“Don’t you dare!”
Jamie said just as firmly. “Just let me make sure I’m okay.”
“You’re okay? I
think I broke my tailbone!”
“Juliet! Will you
shut up for a second? I’m trying to make sure I can move my legs.”
When the guard
heard that, he ran for the lobby to alert the manager on duty. Both the manager
and the guard ran back outside to where Jamie was assessing her injuries.
“Don’t move!” the
manager said. “I called an ambulance and they’ll be here in just a minute.
They’ll know what to do.”
“It’s okay,” Jamie
said. “I think I’m all right.” She tried to roll off Juliet, but the pain hit
her again and she gasped. “Fuck.”
A cab pulled up in
front of the hotel and Ryan got out and spent a moment paying the driver. She
saw the men standing over a couple of people on the ground and assumed it was a
liquor-driven fight, but she took a quick look before going inside and saw a
body that she knew in an instant was her lover. Dropping her bag, she ran over
to the scene and fell to her knees. “Baby! What happened?”
“God, I’m glad to
see you,” Jamie said, then she started to cry.
Ryan was desperate
for information, but a quick look at the men showed her that either they didn’t
know or weren’t going to say what had happened. She looked down again and saw
Juliet. Her stomach flipped at the thought of Jamie lying atop Juliet, but she
swallowed her anxiety and asked again, “What happened?”
“I started to fall
and Jamie tried to catch me. I went down and she fell on top of me. Now she
won’t get off.”
“I can’t,” Jamie
sobbed. “It hurts.”
“Okay. Let’s take
this one step at a time. Tell me where the pain is, Jamie.”
“My right …
everything. My arm and my chest. And my knee.”
“How about your
head? Any pain there?”
Juliet interrupted.
“I’m in pain too, and it doesn’t help to have her on me!”
Ryan looked her
right in the eye. “I don’t care about you. So just shut up and wait.” She
shifted her gaze to Jamie and her expression softened. “How’s your head?”
“Okay, but it
hurts. I feel like I hit my chin.”
Jamie’s head was
resting on her right cheek, and Ryan reached down and touched her face. “You’re
not bleeding. Is your neck stiff?”
“No, I don’t think
so. I think I’m fine, honey. I just hurt my arm. Can you help me up?”
“I’m not sure,”
Ryan said. “I’m worried you might have injured your head or your neck.” She
looked up and asked, “Is an ambulance coming?”
The manager pointed
in the distance, and Ryan looked up to see the vehicle screaming up the
highway. “We’ll let the paramedics do this, baby. They’ll make sure you’re
fine.”
“Damn it,” Juliet
cried. “Get her off me!’
Ryan leaned down
once again and got so close their noses nearly touched. “I’d be happy to knock
you out so you don’t notice her. Wanna give it a try?”
“Oh, you’re tough,
real tough. Just try it!”
“You’re obviously
fine,” Ryan said, standing up and brushing off her knees as the ambulance
pulled up. “If you were really hurt, you wouldn’t have the strength to be a
jerk.”
The ambulance
squealed to a stop and the driver walked over to the women while the passenger
opened the back door of their vehicle. “What happened?” the driver asked.
Juliet volunteered,
“I started to fall backwards and she grabbed me. But I fell and she fell on top
of me. Can you get her off?”
“In a moment,
ma’am. Can you tell me how you’re feeling?”
“My butt hurts and
she’s crushing me, but other than that I think I’m okay.”
He got down on his
knees beside Jamie. “Did you lose consciousness?”
“I’m not sure,” she
said. “Things felt really funny. I think I hit my chin. Maybe … I don’t know.”
He looked at the
other paramedic and said, “Backboard.” The woman pulled out a stretcher with a
backboard on top of it. She rolled it over to the pair and they began attaching
Jamie to it.
It took them quite
a while, but Ryan was thankful that they worked carefully, making sure to
secure Jamie’s head and neck before they allowed her to move. The driver
checked everything one last time, then looked at his partner. “Ready?”
“Yeah,” she said.
They both crouched and lifted the backboard, then set it on the edge of the
stretcher and slowly turned it so Jamie lay on her back. Ryan was right there,
holding her hand and smiling encouragingly.
Juliet started to
get up but the hotel manager said, “Wait! They didn’t tell you to get up!”
“Oh, quit worrying
about your insurance.” She sat up before the paramedics could say a word.
“Damn, my butt hurts!” She rolled over and got to her knees, then stood. Just
as she got steady on her feet, Scott Godfrey, the golf coach, ran out.
“What happened?
Ryan?” he said, looking at her quickly. “What are you doing here?”
“Softball,” she
said. “Jamie and Juliet got tangled up somehow and they fell. Juliet seems fine,
but she’s a pain in the ass. I mean, she has
a pain in the ass. Jamie’s banged up, but it doesn’t look too serious.”
“Says you,” Jamie
said, wincing.
“I just meant it
doesn’t seem life threatening or anything,” Ryan rushed to explain.
“Where I’m from,
this is serious.” Jamie managed a half smile, but looked startled when they
started to move her into the ambulance. “Don’t leave!’ she said, grabbing
Ryan’s hand.
“I won’t.” Ryan
looked at the ambulance driver and he shrugged.
“You can ride up
front in the passenger seat.”
“I’ll take Juliet
to the hospital,” Scott said.
“I don’t need to
go!’
“Yeah, you do. If
there’s any possibility that you’re hurt, we can’t take any chances.”
“I’m fine!”
“No arguments,” he
said. “We’ll get a cab.”
She sighed, but
nodded. The manager went in to call a cab and the attendant closed one side of
the ambulance door, then jumped in. “We’re going to St. Luke’s,” she said.
“We’re right behind
you,” Scott said, watching the ambulance pull away.
***
Ryan got in and
buckled up, then turned around to check on Jamie while the driver pulled into
traffic. “Are you all right?”
“Yeah, but I wish
you were back here.”
“Stop!” Ryan
ordered, making the driver do a double-take.
“What?”
“Stop the
ambulance! My partner wants me in the back with her.”
“Honey, it’s all
right,” Jamie said. “Really.”
“You’re sure?”
Ryan’s tone indicated that she’d figure out a way to get back there, even if
she had to take hostages.
“Yeah. I’m sure.”
The woman sitting
beside Jamie started to take her blood pressure. “We’ll be at the hospital in
less than five minutes. Let’s all calm down.”
“I started it,”
Jamie said. “I know Ryan does whatever I ask of her. I shouldn’t have said
anything.”
“Being injured is
hard,” the woman said. “Nobody really likes being back here.” She checked the
readout and said, “Your pressure’s low. Do you know what your normal reading
is?”
“I forget,” Jamie
said. “But it’s usually a little low.”
The woman nodded
and made a note, then carefully put pressure on various parts of Jamie’s body
and asked if she could feel them. Ryan was practically turned around in her
seat, watching the woman like a hawk. They pulled up at the emergency room
entrance before the paramedic could finish her cursory evaluation, and in just
a few moments they were inside.
A nurse approached
and spoke to the paramedics, their voices too quiet for Ryan to hear—even
though she tried. They moved Jamie into a large room filled with other patients
on gurneys, then they pulled some blue drapes around her spot and took their
leave.
It took a few
minutes for anyone to appear; Ryan was just about to go collar someone when a
young woman came in.
“Hi. I’m Doctor
Singh. I’m going to examine you.”
“Hi,” Jamie said.
Too intent on watching the doctor, Ryan didn’t speak.
“So, tell me what
happened.”
“I was talking with
someone and she started to fall backwards. She was kinda on the edge of a
sidewalk. I grabbed at her hand but she fell anyway. I remember trying to jump
so I didn’t land right on her. Then … I remember falling … and that’s about
it.”
“Did you black
out?”
“I’m not sure,”
Jamie said. “But things got … fuzzy.”
“Did you hit your
head?”
“I don’t think so,
but I hit my chin … somewhere.”
“Hmm …” The doctor
looked at her face. “No marks.”
“It’s her arm that
hurts,” Ryan said, unable to stay quiet.
“Yeah. My arm,”
Jamie said.
“Okay.” The doctor
looked into Jamie’s eyes with a small penlight, and had her follow the
pinpoint. She spent a few minutes making sure Jamie could focus, then asked her
some simple questions, which Jamie answered without problem. “Any stiffness in
your neck?”
“Hard to tell,”
Jamie said, “but I don’t think so.”
The doctor reached
out to test her grip. When Jamie explained that her left arm hurt too much to
move it, the doctor positioned herself so Jamie could keep it where it was,
then asked her to grip. Then she removed Jamie’s shoes and had her press
against her hands with her feet. She continued doing all sorts of small tests
for a few minutes, then said, “Okay. You seem fine, but I’ll order a CAT scan
just to make sure.” She smiled and was gone before Ryan could grab her by the
lapels of her starched white coat.
“She didn’t look at
your arm!”
“I noticed,” Jamie
said, scowling. “It’s throbbing like a bitch!”
“I’ll get somebody
to come in and look at it,” Ryan said, starting to take off.
“No, no, baby. Stay
here. They know what they’re doing.”
“Says you!”
A nurse came in and
said, “Do you need help getting undressed?”
Jamie blinked. “Uhm
… no, why?”
“I’d like you to
put on a gown.”
“We can do it,”
Ryan said, taking it from her. “When is somebody gonna look at what hurts her?”
The nurse looked
puzzled. “What do you mean?”
“That doctor just
looked at her head.”
“Right. This is the
neurology E.R. The doctor said we could take your friend off the backboard. She
just wants a CAT scan to be sure.”
Ryan’s look could
have melted ice. “It’s her arm that hurts.”
“Oh. Right. Well,
after the CAT scan, we’ll move her to orthopedics.”
“How long will that
take?”
“I’m not sure. We’re
busy tonight.” She took out a scissors and cut the tape that was holding
Jamie’s head still. She gently pulled the remnants away from her face and
loosened the straps that held her. “Sure you can undress without help?”
“Yeah. I’m
certain,” Ryan said.
The nurse left and
Ryan spent some time organizing the straps and pieces of tape that were far too
haphazard for her tastes. “You just lie still and I’ll get you undressed.”
“Kinda like home.”
“Yeah. I think my
motor’s really gonna be runnin’ when I get you into this lovely puke-green
gown.”
Jamie lay still and
let Ryan work.
She started at her
feet and had no problem until she got to the long-sleeved shirt. That took some
maneuvering, but she finally got it off. Ryan carefully examined the arm,
wincing at the three-inch long scrape on Jamie’s elbow. “This looks really
raw.”
“Hurts,” she said.
“Can you sit up so
I can get your bra off?”
“If you help me.”
Ryan did, bracing
Jamie’s body so she didn’t have to hold herself up. She got her bra off and her
gown on with remarkable economy. “Okay. If you want me to take the board away,
you’re gonna have to stand up.”
“I’d better. It’s
like lying on a board,” she said, giving Ryan a glimmer of a smile.
They worked
together and soon Jamie was lying on the fairly comfortable gurney. Ryan
adjusted it so she was reclining, but not supine. Then she started to examine
her arm. Jamie smiled at the level of concentration and care that Ryan
exhibited. Ryan had her grip her hand, and nodded when Jamie was able to make a
pretty good fist. She was also able to move her arm, even though she said it
was very stiff.
“Mmm … I think it’s
broken,” Ryan said.
“Broken!”
“Yeah.” She looked
truly sorry for delivering the bad news.
“But … I can move
it!”
“I could be wrong,”
Ryan said. “But I’ve broken mine … a couple of times … and it looks broken to
me. It’s really starting to swell. That’s a bad sign.” She looked thoughtful
for a moment. “I’ll see if I can get you an ice bag.”
She went out to the
nurses’ station and asked for one, but the new nurse on duty said a doctor
would have to approve it. Ryan was going to point out the inherent safety of
frozen water, but she knew it wouldn’t do any good. She’d spent far too many
hours in Emergency Rooms to think that a lecture would get them to change their
policies.
So she went back to
the little room and left the curtain open so they could see what the
competition was. It didn’t take long to realize that nearly everyone in the
room had suffered a stroke or some other form of brain injury. The women looked
at each other and Ryan went in search of a chair, knowing it wouldn’t be their
turn very soon.
***
After an hour Jamie
said, “I should call my mom.”
“Wanna wait until
we know what’s wrong?”
“Mmm … if our
daughter was in the hospital, when would you want to know?”
Without comment,
Ryan pulled Jamie’s cell phone from the pile of her belongings and handed it to
her. Jamie smiled and dialed. “Hi, Marta. It’s Jamie. Is my mom home?” She
blinked, “In New York? When did she leave?” Jamie looked less than happy. “Was
this planned?” She paused to let Marta reply, then said, “No, it’s nothing. I
can call her on her cell phone. Thanks. G’night, Marta.”
She snapped her
phone closed and said, “She left for
Ryan raised her
eyebrows. “Maybe she just decided to see a play or something.”
“Nope. Marta said
she told her about the trip over a week ago. She intentionally didn’t tell me.”
“Uhm … maybe she
forgot,” Ryan said, knowing that wasn’t the case.
“She didn’t want me
to know.” Jamie’s scowl grew deeper. “She must be with Giacomo.”
“Really? Why
“Well, he’s an art
dealer. I’m sure he goes to
“Huh. I wonder why
she didn’t say anything.”
“Either she doesn’t
want me to know or she doesn’t want me to give her a hard time or she
embarrassed.”
Ryan nodded. “Those
sound like the most logical reasons. I hope she’s not embarrassed.”
“I hope she is,”
Jamie grumbled. “Then she might stop this nonsense!”
“Aren’t you gonna
call her?”
“No,” Jamie said,
pouting. “If she can have secrets, so can I.”
***
They took Jamie for
the CAT scan at one o’clock in the morning, and shortly after she left, Scott
found Ryan sitting in the empty cubicle. “Hi,” he said. “How’s Jamie?”
“I think her
elbow’s broken, but I’m the only one who has looked at it. She’s having a CAT
scan now—for no good reason. How’s Juliet?”
“Fine. Just bruised
her tailbone. I’ll send her back to the hotel in a cab and stay with you.”
“Nah. Don’t do
that, Scott. We’ll probably be here all night. You should get some rest. I can
take care of Jamie.”
He gave her a
rueful grin. “How can I sleep when one of my best players is in the hospital?”
“She’ll be fine. I
might be wrong; she might just have a bad bruise. Think happy thoughts and go
to sleep.”
He looked
reluctant, but said, “I normally wouldn’t leave, but you two are clearly
capable of taking care of yourselves. I can’t say that about the rest of the
team.”
“This is kinda like
having a bunch of college-aged daughters, isn’t it?”
“A little bit.
Jamie’s the best of the bunch,” he said, smiling.
“You don’t have to
convince me.” Ryan’s eyes shifted and she stood up. “Here’s my girl now.”
Jamie looked
remarkably pale and small in the large, green gown, but she was smiling and
looked good, all things considered. “Hi,” she said to Scott. “They just took a
picture of my head. They’re working their way down to my arm.”
Scott took a look
at the elbow and tried not to wince. It was already turning blue and was at
least twice its normal size. Jamie had her hand resting on her belly, and Ryan
had rolled a sheet up to support the arm. “Looks like it hurts,” he said.
“Actually, it
doesn’t hurt much if I don’t move it.”
“Well, keep a good
thought. Maybe it’s just a bruise.”
“That’s what I
think,” Jamie said. “I think it’d hurt more if it was broken.”
Ryan smiled,
knowing that had never been the case with her broken bones. But she didn’t want
to dash Jamie’s hopes for a quick recovery.
“Ryan told me to
head back to the hotel,” Scott said. “Is that okay with you?”
“Yeah. You don’t
need to stay. At this rate, today’s match’ll be over before I get anyone to
look at me.”
“I’ll have my cell
phone on,” Scott said. “Call me if you need anything. Do you need me to call
your parents, Jamie?”
“No, I’m good.
Thanks, Scott. Good luck today.”
“I’ll count it
lucky if you’re not badly hurt.”
He turned and left
and Ryan smiled and said, “You didn’t ask how Juliet was.”
“Huh. Guess I don’t
care.”
“That’s a good
sign,” Ryan said. “Shows you’re coming to your senses.”
***
The neurologist
came by at 2:00 and said there was no indication of a head injury. She ordered
an ice pack for Jamie’s arm, but the swelling was about as bad as it was going
to get. When the ice pack arrived, Ryan got it placed around Jamie’s arm and
held it in place. Her brow furrowed and she pulled the gown down from Jamie’s
neck.
“Big bruise on your
chest. That must be where your chin hit.” She touched it lightly and Jamie
winced.
“That’s the spot.”
“Hey, if we’re here
long enough, we’ll have you completely diagnosed.”
“Super. Hey, would
you get me a soda? I need some caffeine if I’m gonna be up all night.”
“You can sleep,
honey. You’re on a nice bed.”
“If this is a nice
bed, Juliet’s a nice teammate.”
***
They moved Jamie to
the regular E.R. at 3:30, and a little before 5:00 she was finally taken for an
x-ray. A very tired looking young man showed up at 6:00, holding Jamie’s x-ray
in his hand. “Hi,” he said, “Dr. Morgan. Looks like your elbow’s broken.”
“Damn!” Jamie said.
“Can I see the x-ray?”
“Yeah. Sure. Looks
like a simple olecranon fracture.”
“Displaced?” Ryan
asked, looking over the doctor’s shoulder.
He looked at Ryan
quickly, clearly puzzled that she’d asked an intelligent question. “Not much,”
he said, pointing at the spot on the x-ray with his pen. “Maybe half an inch.
It should heal fine.” He examined Jamie for a few minutes, checking to make
sure she didn’t have any other injuries. “I’ll splint you, and then you can
make an appointment to see an orthopedist in a few days.”
“Aren’t you an orthopedist?” Ryan asked,
narrowing her eyes.
“I’m a resident,”
he said. “But the orthopedist on duty looked at the x-ray with me. He agrees
with the diagnosis.”
Ryan didn’t look
happy, but she let him leave to get the material for the splint. “We’ll get you
to a good doctor when we get home.”
“I’m sure we will,”
Jamie said, smiling at her partner. “What does displaced mean?”
“Oh. Just that the
little piece that broke off isn’t quite where it should be. That’s not a big
deal, though. I’ve had that one.”
“You’ve had all of
’em!”
The doctor came
back and wet some long strips of gauze. He asked Jamie to straighten her arm,
and it took her a good minute to get it to comply.
“Would have been
nice if I knew I should have it straight,” she grumbled. “It wasn’t so swollen yesterday.”
He didn’t comment,
just started to wrap her arm in something that looked almost like lamb’s wool.
Then he laid the gauze strips on Jamie’s arm. They were fairly slimy, and she
made a face when one of them touched her bare arm. “That high?” she asked, when
he placed them from her shoulder to her wrist.
“Yeah. Don’t want
your elbow or your wrist to move.”
The gauze strips
started to harden, and he fashioned it by making a few cuts with a sturdy
scissors. Then he wrapped it in an elastic bandage, running it all the way up
her arm.
“That looks
lovely,” she said grumpily.
“You’ll be fine.
Just keep it elevated whenever you can. The faster the swelling goes down, the
faster you can have it casted.”
“I have to get a
cast?”
“Probably. Depends
on what the orthopedist thinks. But he won’t be able to do anything until the
swelling goes down. You shouldn’t even bother seeing someone for three days.”
“Great. Just
great.”
He held her arm up
and looked at it. “Looks good. Take care.” Once again, he was gone before
either woman could say a word.
“Do they learn that
in medical school?”
“They must,” Ryan
said. “It’s hard to imagine that all of these people figured out how to
disappear on their own.”
“It’s time for us
to disappear. I want some drugs and a bed.”
“Damn! We didn’t
get a prescription!”
“I’ll call my
doctor. She’ll prescribe something over the phone.”
“No, we should get
something here. Besides, we’ll be home by this afternoon. We just need to make
you comfortable until then.”
“Don’t be
ridiculous!” Jamie said. “You’ve got games to play!”
Clearly shocked,
Ryan stared at her. “We’re going home! We’ve got to get you to a real doctor
and get you propped up in your own bed.”
“Fine. I’ll go home
if you insist, but you’re staying here.” Jamie’s eyes were slightly narrowed, a
sure sign of her determination.
Ryan sat down,
looking tired and frustrated. Rubbing her face with both hands she mumbled,
“Why are you being so difficult?”
“I’m not. You have
an obligation. You can’t desert your team because I broke a bone. This isn’t
life and death.”
Leaning forward,
Ryan rested her forehead on the gurney. “Don’t fight me, Jamie. I’m tired and
sick of sitting here all night. My teammates will understand.”
“You can talk all
you want, but I’ll be very disappointed in you if you leave. It’s just not
necessary.”
Ryan sighed.
“Fine.” She got up, looking like the weight of the world was on her shoulders.
“I’ll go see if someone will write you a prescription.”
A few minutes later
Ryan came back with the doctor who’d spoken to them when Jamie was moved to the
regular E.R. “Everything looks good,” she said. “Both the orthopedist and the
neurologist have said you can leave.”
“Can you write me a
prescription for the pain?”
“Sure. What do you
like?”
“Uhm … I don’t
know,” Jamie said. “I’ve never been injured before.”
The doctor gave her
a funny look and Ryan said, “How about some Vicodin?”
“Okay. I’ll give
you enough to last until you see an orthopedist. Is that all right?”
“Uhm … sure. That’s
fine,” Jamie said.
The doctor took her
pad out and wrote a prescription for ten pills. Ryan thought that was a little
miserly, but she knew that Jamie could get more if she needed it. After the
doctor left, they had an interesting few minutes trying to get Jamie’s shirt
on. Luckily, Ryan had on a T-shirt under her warm-up jacket, so she took off
the T-shirt and put it on Jamie, then zipped up her warm-up.
“Why don’t you put
my shirt on?” Jamie asked, eyes twinkling.
“I’d look like the
Incredible Hulk when he ripped the seams of his shirt.”
“I know. I think
it’d look cool.”
“Maybe at home,”
Ryan said, smiling tiredly. She gently helped Jamie to her feet and they went
outside to get into a waiting cab.
After a stop at a
pharmacy, they walked into the hotel where they saw a few of the players
gathering in the lobby to head off to the course. Jamie spent a few minutes
telling her teammates what had happened while Ryan called Coach Roberts on her
cell phone. She was just hanging up when Jamie took her hand.
“Take me to bed.”
“Happy to. I called
my coach and told him the whole story. He said I could be late if I had to.”
“You don’t need to
be,” Jamie said. “You’ve got plenty of time to prop me up in bed and get there
on time.”
“Fine.”
Ryan looked a
little miffed, but Jamie was determined not to let her injury affect both of
their sports. As soon as they got in the room, Jamie was tearing at the
prescription bag with her teeth.
“Can I lend you a
hand, sport?” Ryan asked, chuckling at her partner’s attempts to work with one
hand. She opened the container and shook out a pill, then filled a glass with
water. “Here ya go.”
Jamie downed the
pill and sat on the bed. “I feel like I’ve been beaten.”
“I’ll bet,” Ryan
said, ruffling her hair. “This is a new thing for you. You’re not used to the
drill.”
“I racked up a few
skinned knees and a bloody nose or two. That’s it.”
Ryan sat down next
to her. “How ya feeling? Pretty bad?”
“No, not too awful.
It doesn’t hurt as much as I thought a broken bone would.”
“Sometimes they
hurt more as the day goes on, but it’ll feel better by tomorrow. And, you can
decide for yourself, but if it were me, I’d take ibuprofen and add a Vicodin
only if you really need it.”
“Really?”
“That’s just what I
do. Vicodin works on opioid receptors in your brain and spine and gut. It’s the
gut part I don’t like.”
“It works on my
intestines?”
“Yeah. You have
opioid receptors in your gastrointestinal tract. Every time I take codeine or
hydrocodone, I have trouble.”
“What kinda
trouble?”
“It slows
everything down, waaaaay down,” Ryan said. “I hate to be constipated.”
“Eww! I can’t
imagine anyone likes that.”
“Good point. So I
take ibuprofen and only add a Vike if I’m really uncomfortable.”
“A Vike, huh?
Pretty familiar with these babies, aren’t ya, O’Flaherty?”
“Yeah. More than I
wish I were.” She went over to the dresser, knowing that Jamie would have her
clothing neatly arranged. “Ready for bed?” She pulled out a pair of pajamas.
“I’ll just wear
your shirt. I like it.”
“Okay.” Ryan put
the pajamas away and helped Jamie out of the rest of her clothes. When she had
her settled, with pillows elevating her arm, Ryan sat down on the other bed and
called room service. “I can’t believe I’m doing this, but I don’t wanna leave
you.” When someone answered, she said, “Hi. I’d like some breakfast. Some kind
of omelet … Yeah, that’s fine. And a bagel and an order of toast. No, that’s
all.” She hung up and smiled at Jamie.
“Carb loading?”
“Oh. I got the
toast for you. The Vike can be hard on your tummy.”
“You take good care
of me, babe. I’m damned glad you were here.”
“Me too.” Ryan sat
next to her and stroked her hair. “I really don’t wanna leave you, honey. Are
you sure you won’t reconsider?”
“Nope. I’ll sleep
the day away. If I feel horrible, I’ll let you take me home tonight. But I
don’t think I will.”
“Okay,” Ryan said.
“Uhm … wanna call your mom now?”
“Yeah. I guess I
should. I just don’t want her to know I know where she is, since she obviously
didn’t want me to.”
“It’s up to you,”
Ryan said. “I’m gonna take a quick shower. Want the TV on?”
“Sure. See if there
are any cartoons on.”
“It’s Saturday
morning! This is
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