As Gabrielle came up to the palace, she noticed immediately Ephiny had been true to word. There were Royal guards at the front door, and Eponin was standing at the back. The palace was theirs. Hesitantly at first, Gabrielle continued on to the back door. Eponin said nothing, only nodded as she opened the door for the bard.

Slowly walking down the hall, she spotted the sleeping form of Xena in the common room. She carried the tray of food over to the table, and walked around to face her lover. Gabrielle was certain the loud beating of her heart would wake her warrior, but it didn't. The bard realized how strange it was to walk up on a sleeping Xena, something that would never have happened in the past.

Gabrielle noticed the long scar. It did look a lot better, but it was still there, a constant reminder that this was a different Xena. But it didn’t stop her from wanting to climb in next to her, and tell her how much she still loved her. Her eyes drifted down Xena's body, spotting the new bandage. Obviously a wound from last night's drinking party.

Not trusting herself, or Xena totally, she moved over to a chair and sat down. Whether it was the noise of chair, or Xena's ability to sense a person's presence, it didn't matter, the blue eyes fluttered open.

Gabrielle felt a rush of emotion when she saw Xena's eyes widen in delight having spotted her sitting there.

"Hi, ... I am so happy to see you." Xena tried to sit up too quickly and grimaced in pain. Gabrielle, out of pure reflex, jumped up to offer assistance.

"I'm, ok. No, please don't sit down. Come sit by me." Xena patted the big fur-covered bench.

Seeing the hesitation and concern on her face, Xena quickly started talking.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I never should have yelled at you. I should never have said those things to you, Gabrielle. I can't apologize enough. Please ..." She patted the bench again.

Gabrielle slowly sat down."You scared me Xena."

"I know that now. I think I even knew it then, but it just came out. I've regretted it ever since. I wish I could promise it will never happen again, but I can't."

Seeing her friends body tense with this information, she continued, "Pieces of my past are coming at me all the time now. But they're just pieces. I need to put them together. I need you to help me put them together. Yes, ... I am afraid of how I will react to some of these visions, but I know now that deep in my heart I would never hurt you." Slowly Xena reached out and gently took a hold of Gabrielle's hand.

"I care for you, I care for greatly, I know that now." A sob broke from Gabrielle. Xena wiggled a little closer. Releasing her hold on Gabrielle's hand, she slowly put her fingers under her chin and looked deep into her green eyes.

"I want to know why you didn't want to tell me." Tilting her head to one side she moved her hand from Gabrielle's chin to brush away the falling tears.

"Why?" Xena whispered.

The bard swallowed hard. "I didn't think you needed the added pressure. I had to know if it would come to you on it's own."

Xena looked hard and long into those green eyes, until she knew deep down inside what her body had known all along, she loved her. That constant longing, the ache she thought was part of her injuries, was her heart telling her it knew what she did not?

Xena took her hand from Gabrielle's face. With only the one good hand and one good leg, the mighty Xena, warrior princess, struggled to stand. The little bard had offered her help twice, but both times Xena had shaken her head no. Finally rewarded, a wavering Xena stood ... unaided. Turning carefully, she held out her hand.

"Come here." Was all she needed to whisper? A smile broke through the wet face of Gabrielle as she ever so carefully melted into Xena's arms. Content and secure at last, the two lost lovers held each other. It was the first time since the day they parted at the river. There they stood the warrior and her bard. Gabrielle felt only pure relief, and Xena for the first time ... felt at home. But it was only to last a moment as Gabrielle could feel Xena's body begin to shake with the effort it had just put forth.

"Xena?" Gabrielle made herself pull out of her warrior's arms. She could see the pain, fatigue, and loss of color in Xena's face. She quickly went under Xena's left arm and hollered.

"Eponin!" The back door was thrown open before Gabrielle even finished calling her name.

Quickly seeing the situation, Eponin raced to Xena’s side before she could hit the floor. In one strong, fluid motion the Amazon had the dark haired warrior in her arms.

"Do you want her here, or back in your bedroom?" Eponin looked at Gabrielle.

"The bedroom would probably be better." The quiet warrior headed to the bedroom with the body of Xena. Slowly and gently she laid her on the bed, Eponin turned to go.

"Thank you, Eponin." Gabrielle could see the question on Eponin's face.

She smiled. "We're good."

Eponin's relief was evident, and she quickly added on her departure. "You will not be disturbed until morning, my Queen" The door was quietly closed.

"I guess that was a bit too much." The low voice said quietly from the bed.

Gabrielle turned to see Xena's eyes had opened again, a faint smile was on her still pale face.

"Xena, how do you feel?" Gabrielle said as she crossed the room and sat on the bed.

The warrior princess studied the face in front of her for a moment before she answered.

"Shaky and a little queasy." Xena patted the bed and Gabrielle slid in closer.

"Can I get you anything? Do you want some water or something?"

"I wouldn't mind all my memory back. The bits and pieces are ok, I mean, at least it's something. I know who you are now. But I don't remember all of what we've done together, and I know I'm still missing some big pieces of who I am and who we were." Xena lifted her hands taking Gabrielle's face into their possession.

"But I do know how I feel ... inside. I feel my heart pounding. I feel my chest tightening. I have never felt so nervous."

"Xena?" The warrior placed her fingers on Gabrielle's lips stopping the bard's voice of concern.

"Gabrielle ... I don't know much, but I do know what I want." Xena said in a whisper as she slowly leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Gabrielle's very stunned lips.

Ephiny and Jadax slowly wandered their way to the palace arm in arm, not paying a lot of attention as to what was in front of them, until they ran straight into Eponin.

"Oh ... I'm so sorry Eponin. We didn't see you?"

"Actually my Queen, it was my fault for ... stopping you," Eponin added the last part slowly hoping she wouldn't have to repeat it.

"Stopping us ...?" Ephiny questioned.

"Yes, my Queen."

"Oh, cut the ‘my Queen’ shit Eponin. What's this about?"

"You said absolute privacy of the whole palace Ephiny. Your own words."

"I know that, but I didn't mean us. Where in Tartarus are we suppose to sleep tonight?"

"You may have my hut, or I understand Nazalon's will be available ... all night."

"All night?"

"All night!" Eponin said with a sly smile.

Jadax squeezed Ephiny's hand tighter.

"Then things are going good?" Ephiny asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yes, I believe those were the exact words Gabrielle used."

All three stood there smiling like idiots, while Eponin related what little she knew.

"So Nazalon's hut is still empty."

"Yes. She mentioned she was spending the evening on the other side of the hill."

"Well, I guess we'll squeeze into her hut for the night, then. Let me know if there is any trouble."

The two departed with Jadax muttering something about the position they would have to sleep in. Eponin heard Ephiny laugh in response.

The two heads separated as the green eyes stared into blue. Not a word was spoken, the eyes said it all. Smiles began to form on freshly kissed lips.

"I know I've done that before." The husky voiced warrior stated with a grin. "And I know I'd like to do it again."

Xena slowly leaned back in to reclaim the lips that had felt so familiar. But the pressure of Gabrielle's out stretched hand stopped the movement. Xena pulled back and looked at Gabrielle questioningly. Her mind searching.

'Have I misread all this? Did I just step way out of bounds?'

"Did I just cross a line I wasn't suppose to?" Xena asked in bewilderment.

"No." Gabrielle smiled. "No, that line has been crossed before. Matter of fact, there are no longer any boundaries between us Xena. But I have to know, I have to be certain, that it is you kissing me. Because you want to ... in here." Touching her chest, "and in here." Gabrielle placed a finger on Xena's head.

"All I can say is, I have seen us kiss before and I liked the feeling that went through my body. Every image I have seen of you, I always felt an ache to be near you. I just wanted to hold you. Then I realized, when you weren't here, it wasn't just that I missed you. I longed for you. I wanted to feel you next to me."

Xena looked deeply into Gabrielle’s wide green eyes.

"I knew if I could just hold you, the part of me that aches, would stop aching ... I may not know who I am, but I know what I want. I know who I want ... I want you."

Xena watched as the bard’s eyes began to fill with tears. The tight knot in her own throat was swallowed down as she felt the onset of her own emotions.

"I want to hold you. I want to kiss you, and the Gods willing Gabrielle, I want very much to make love to you."

Their tears fell in unison. Their hearts were pounding loudly as their minds were racing almost out of control. Hands tightly held by hands. Gabrielle finally spoke.

"There is so much you still don't know, things you haven't remembered. I think until you are more you ..." Gabrielle's voice trailed off to silence as her body and heart screamed for her not to say the words echoing in her mind.

Gabrielle saw the immediate reaction of her words in Xena’s face. Part of her wanted to say forget it all and make mad passionate love to this woman in front of her, but she knew she couldn’t.

"I also don't think your body is ready for that. I think we should wait."

"I don't want to wait. I know how I feel and I know what I want."

"And I want it too, Xena. But I think if we rush this it could be a big mistake. But I still want to hold you, and I still want to be held by you. I want to feel your body next to mine, the sweet taste of your kisses."

Before she could say anything more, Xena leaned to claim the kiss she so badly wanted. Gabrielle's lips responded and so did her body. The warrior felt the small movement as Gabrielle moved closer to her. Lips that had started so gently, were now pressing firmly, determined to have what they thought was their own.

A small whimper of desire escaped from Xena's chest and Gabrielle immediately pulled away.

"Are you all right?"

"No," gasped a breathless Xena, "I don’t understand but I will abide by your decision."

Xena awkwardly pulled Gabrielle closer with her left hand and splinted right arm. Just holding her close felt so safe. She held her tight, kissing the top of the blond hair. Xena felt Gabrielle nestle in closer, she felt a serenity she hadn’t felt in a long time. It didn’t take the warrior and the Queen long to fall into a peaceful sleep, wrapped up in each other’s arms.

Gabrielle woke the next morning feeling the secure warmth of Xena's body. She snuggled in a little closer, and sighed in happiness.

"Good morning."

The bard felt, more than heard, the deep vibration of Xena's voice. Lifting her head she placed her chin on the warrior's chest and looked up into the icy blue eyes she knew so well.

"Good morning, yourself."

Gabrielle pulled her body upwards and placed a sweet kiss onto awaiting lips. As they parted, Gabrielle kept her focus on Xena's eyes, not wanting to look anywhere else. But the ever perceptive Xena detected the problem.

"Does it bother you that much?"

Gabrielle's eyes betrayed her as they traveled down the length of Xena's scar, observing the damage the act of violence had caused. The once unmarred bronze face was now twisted and distorted as the raised, red, ribbon pulled at her eye and the corner of her mouth. Her left cheekbone was sunken from the force of the blade that had cut so deeply.

Gabrielle swallowed as she withdrew her eyes from the scar.

"Not in the way you're thinking." No longer fixated on the line of proud flesh, she gazed into Xena's blue eyes.

"And in what way do I think?"

"The scar itself doesn't bother me, it's the ugliness and hatred it represents. All you went through at the hands of those men." Gabrielle lifted her hand to the side of Xena’s face. "Your beauty is not who you are, Xena. You are a striking woman and I still see that. What they did to you ... is barbaric."

Her green eyes showed the resentment she felt for the men who had almost killed the woman she loved.

"Why would someone want to do this to you? Was it something in your past? Or were they just so wicked that they wanted just to torture anyone? How much more do you have to do to atone for your past?" Gabrielle could feel her anger for these men rising up inside of her. She closed her eyes and centered herself before speaking again. "What bothers me is, this will always be a constant reminder of everything that’s happened, to you and to us ..."

Xena could see there was more. Something else was eating away at the bard. Xena wondered what it was. She reached over and lifted Gabrielle's chin again to look deep into her eyes, green eyes that reflected the truth that was in the bard’s heart.

"And?" Xena said simply. She waited for Gabrielle to answer. It didn’t take long for the root of Gabrielle’s anguish to show itself. The warrior watched as the bard let go of the remorse that tore at her soul.

"That I wasn't with you when it happened, I left you alone. You were injured and I left you alone." Her voice broke at the admission of her own guilt.

Xena's arm wrapped tightly around her as Gabrielle buried her head into Xena's chest. It was the patient’s turn to do the soothing. The warrior held her tight, kissing her head and telling her it was going to be all right. Xena tried to think of anything to soften the pain Gabrielle was feeling. She may have been a warrior but she couldn’t handle the torment on the bard’s face.

"Hey, hey, come on ... look at me. I have one question to ask ... Listen ... Whose idea was it for me to be alone?"

A quiet voice responded, "Yours."

"Knowing what I know about myself so far, I knew that. And I also know if it was my decision, there wasn't much you could have done ... Right? I'm right, aren't I?"

Gabrielle nodded.

"So the only person at fault is me. Right? ... Right?"

Gabrielle nodded again.

"And according to Ephiny, I'm pretty bull headed, so you couldn't have changed my mind, could you?"

Gabrielle nodded once more.

"And if you don't stop nodding your head against my chest, I'll take every ounce of strength I do have and take you right now, injuries be damned."

Gabrielle lifted her flushed face and smiled. Slowly rising up onto her knees, a mischievous look of daring on her face. Gently and mindfully, she straddled Xena's mid section. Looking deep into the warrior's eyes, she leaned forward, pinning both of Xena's arms above her head. All the while being very cautious of Xena's injuries.

"I"d like to see you try, warrior babe!" Gabrielle said as she leaned in tickling Xena's face with her long, blond hair. When Xena tried to lift her head in search of Gabrielle's lips, the little blond saw a flash of pain. Loosening her hold slightly, she brought her own lips down onto Xena's. The kisses now were definitely more intense, as the two searched for release of their pent up emotions and desires. Losing herself in the moment, Gabrielle's grip on the warrior's arms loosened, allowing Xena the freedom she wanted. Feeling a hand working its way up her stomach, Gabrielle realized it was almost too much freedom as the two would be lovers were starting to lose their self control. Their hands and tongues began to search for their own desires. They almost didn't hear the soft knock on the bedroom door. They parted their passions just in time to look over to see Ephiny's head coming around the door.

Ephiny beamed at the sight of Gabrielle blushing on top of her warrior princess. The look on their faces told the Queen it had been a good night, a very good night.

"I don't believe that is a recommended position for someone who is trying to recover from serious injures." Ephiny smiled with raised eyebrows.

"Speak for yourself." Xena said glancing at Ephiny. She turned her attentions back to Gabrielle and she added, "this position is doing wonders for my recovery."

The two gazed into each other’s eyes as Xena massaged her left hand up and down Gabrielle's side.

"I can see that." Ephiny said with smug delight.

"So what happened to our privacy, Ephiny? I thought we had the palace to ourselves for the night and the morning."

"Ah ... I hate to break it to you two lovebirds, but it's noon."

The two traded smiles and Xena laughingly said, "No wonder I'm so hungry."

"Oh, by the Gods Xena, your food from yesterday, it's still in the common room" Gabrielle carefully lifted herself off of Xena, much to the warrior's unhappiness, and quickly left the room.

"Might I assume things got worked out?" The regent said to the warrior now that they were alone.

"You could say that. All I know is, I feel a big piece of what was missing is now back where she belongs."

"I'm very happy, for both of you. I'm very sorry I couldn't tell you sooner, but it was her decision and your step to take."

"Yes, Ephiny, I know that ... now."

A humming Gabrielle returned with a platter of food.

"Well, some of it is still ok." The bard said as she picked at some of the hardened cheese.

"I'll leave you two alone. Actually, why don't you let me go get you something fresh from the kitchen."

"Thank you, Ephiny, that would be nice." Ephiny nodded and quietly closed the door as Gabrielle snuggled back into Xena's side.

The hot days of summer were passing with much due happiness. Ephiny was happy her village was almost normal again. Jadax was happy just to have more time with her Queen. Eponin was happy to get back to just her warrior duties, and Gabrielle and Xena were just happy to hold and comfort each other. The only one who didn't share everyone’s happiness, was Nazalon.

As much as she tried to be happy for the warrior and her bard, she couldn't get passed her feelings toward Gabrielle. Eponin had noticed how much time Nazalon spent on her own now. She also noticed the warrior hadn't been back to her hut, but had been spending her evenings on the west side of the hill. Eponin mulled over whether or not to bring this to the Queen's attention. She finally decided to give the warrior some more time to get over her lost love.

Xena's constant questions to Gabrielle were a great source of happiness to the little bard. It was no secret she loved to talk, though she always tried to keep the stories basic and bare boned, letting Xena fill in the gaps when she could. But she always was aware that somewhere under the surface were some questions she didn't want to answer. Questions she knew were sure to come. Questions about lies and betrayals that had almost destroyed them up once before. Gabrielle wondered if their relationship could survive it ... again.

"What?" Gabrielle said when she realized Xena had asked her a question.

"Well, I had asked if you knew where Eponin was, but maybe I should have asked where you were?"

They had spent most of the morning lying in bed, but Gabrielle was now sitting in the window seat enjoying the view from their room. Xena had been staring at the ceiling her left arm supported under her head. It was easy to see the thoughts going around in both of their minds.

"I'm sorry Xena, I guess I was day dreaming?"

"Should I ask about what, or dare I say who?"

"There is no need. You know who. And as far as Eponin goes, I'm not sure. Actually, I'm not even sure if she's in the village." the bard said having thought about it for a moment.

"I would like to see her if you wouldn't mind tracking her down."

"Are you sure there isn't something I could do?"

Xena's eyelids closed ever so slightly and her voice deepened before answering. "I could think of a few things that I'd like you to do."

"Xena!"

"All right, fine," said the warrior rolling her eyes. Gabrielle laughed as she left the room in search of the quiet Amazon.

Gabrielle was finally successful in finding Eponin, and in Artemis’ temple no less. She was uncomfortable in entering the temple she had intentionally been avoiding. She hesitated but saw no problem with just entering and then leaving again.

Eponin was having a discussion with the priestess which she quickly ended when she saw Gabrielle.

"Is there a problem?" The warrior asked with great concern.

"I don't think so. Xena just asked to see you."

"Well, come on then, we'll walk back to the palace together. If that's all right?" Eponin had noticed Gabrielle's uneasiness.

Momentarily distracted as she looked around the temple, she didn’t answer right away. It had just dawned on her no one had ever mentioned the mantel she had torn down.

"Ummm, oh yes, that would be great." Gabrielle finally answered the waiting warrior.

They chatted all the way to the palace about nothing in particular. Eponin was happy to finally see the old Gabrielle emerging. Her smile was real, her laughter was light and her eyes were dancing with happiness.

"I'm glad things are starting to work out for you two," the warrior finally finding an opening to speak.

"A lot of that is thanks to you, you know. You’re the one who blew open our little secret. Which before you apologize again, I'm very glad you did."

Eponin nodded and opened the back door for Gabrielle, both women spotting Ephiny coming out of Xena's room.

"Oh there you are Gabrielle. I was ... just looking for you. Xena said she wanted to talk to Eponin, so I thought you might join Jadax and me for lunch?"

Gabrielle hesitated for a moment, thinking obviously Xena wanted to be alone with Eponin. Trying not to sound too concerned, she answered the regent as her eyes held on their bedroom door.

"Sure, I'll just let Xena know I'm going,"

"No, it's ok ... I just talked to her. Hi Eponin." Ephiny leaned around Gabrielle to make eye contact with the warrior.

Gabrielle turned to leave with Ephiny, once out of ear shot Xena said to Eponin, "It took you long enough to get here!"

"So there hasn't been anything more than a few flashes of memory?" Ephiny asked Gabrielle.

"Not that I'm aware of. She tells me now when she gets them, so I can fill in any missing or confusion points. I thought we were going for lunch," Gabrielle said with puzzlement when Ephiny didn’t turn in the direction of the kitchen.

"We are, but Jadax is over at the training grounds and I told her I'd come and get her when I was ready for lunch." The regent replied as they walked passed the row of huts lining the compound.

"The training grounds?" Gabrielle said, making no attempt to cover her surprise.

"Yes, Nazalon and Eponin have been working with her. It seems she has taken up the bow and arrow. I've been told she's quite good, but she won’t let me see her use it yet."

"But Ephiny, she's a scout. Why does she want to learn to use a weapon?"

"Xena's injuries have been far reaching, Gabrielle." It was all Ephiny needed to say as they broke through the trees to the training grounds.

A large, open clearing was scattered with Amazons all in different groups, training with different weapons. Where once there was a grassy field was now worn to the red soil by months of heavy use. There were targets for archers and many different styles of posts to practice their weapons on, though many of the women were sparring with partners.

Gabrielle’s eyes immediately went to the women working on their staff techniques. The spinning staffs made her smile as she recalled her own early training lessons from Ephiny and Eponin. The sound of metal on metal could be heard as warrior’s sparred with their swords.

As Gabrielle turned at the sound, she spotted Jadax quickly striding over to them, a large bow was in her hand. Gabrielle could see the slight disappointment on Ephiny's face, she had hoped to see her little scout show off her new abilities.

After pleasantries were exchanged, the three headed for the kitchen. Ephiny noticed how quiet Gabrielle got when Jadax slipped her hand through her own. Whispering quietly to her, Jadax nodded in understanding, and let her lover’s hand go.

"I've got a great idea. How about enjoying this lovely day with a picnic?" Jadax said with a mischievous smile.

Ephiny quickly agreed, but Gabrielle said she didn't want to spend too much time away from Xena.

"Ah come on, you need to get outside more. You're still too pale ... come on. How about I run back and ask Xena if it's ok." Ephiny questioned as she stopped.

"That's not fair, Eph. and you know it. Xena would say it was ok with her, even if it wasn't."

"Then it's a date ... come on." Ephiny looped her arm through the two and headed toward the kitchen. "We'll get enough for Xena for later."

Gabrielle really didn't want to go, but it didn't take her long to join in on the fun. The cooks were more than willing to help out the three as they prepared a basket. Meat, cheeses, bread and some fresh fruit was their bounty when they finally left the kitchen. Jadax had run down to the barn and joined them as they were leaving, her arms laden with blankets.

"Well, where are we going to have this little party?" Ephiny said as they left the kitchen.

"How about on the hill?" Jadax was referring to a clearing that was behind the palace. It had an excellent view of the village and the valley below.

"That sounds good, is that all right with you?" Ephiny said to Gabrielle.

"Sure, I can just stop in and see that Xena's ok and let her know where I have gone."

"I'll do it," said Jadax. She pushed the blankets into Gabrielle's arms and was gone.

"No wonder you love her so much, Eph. She is almost too enthusiastic."

"She's a little excitable I'll admit, but I love that about her."

The two Queens continued on their way. Jadax had returned before they reached the palace steps.

"Xena’s fine. She said to take your time, she was going to take a nap." Jadax said to Gabrielle as she slyly winked at Ephiny.

The three headed up the path behind the palace.

The warm breeze from the summer sun played with the branches of the evergreens and the tall grass lining the pathway. The dense forest was just a step or two off to either side of the three women. The thick old growth with it’s moss cloaked branches swallowed any of the sounds they were making. Gabrielle marveled at the view falling away behind them.

The bard followed as Ephiny stepped off the path at a break in the trees, Jadax a mere step behind her. Gabrielle felt the sudden change in temperature as they entered the shade of the forest. She glanced up at the tall trees around her, covering the forest floor with the canopy of green.

They broke through the trees to a small clearing of long grass. Gabrielle almost ran into the back of Ephiny, she had been enjoying the beauty of the meadow and hadn’t noticed the regent had stopped. The bard looked questioningly at Ephiny and Jadax. She knew instantly they were up to something.

"All right, what’s going on?" Neither of the Amazons answered. Instead they moved aside to give Gabrielle a full view of the small meadow.

There, up ahead, in the middle of the clearing, sitting on a log, was Xena. Standing, smiling beside her, was Eponin.

"It was all her idea. She just needed us to carry it out. Here, we'll be back later to collect you both." Ephiny handed the basket to Gabrielle. Eponin had left Xena’s side and was striding toward them.

"I don't know what to say, to you all," said a beaming Gabrielle.

"Well then don't say anything, just get your ass over there." She didn't have to be told twice.

As the little bard walked through the grass to Xena, she noticed a couple of changes. The first and foremost was that Xena was wearing her leathers again. Someone had done a great job in repairing the torn and stained garment. The second was how much better her warrior looked out in the great outdoors. And how relaxed and happy she looked as Gabrielle got closer.

"I can see by the look on your face that I don't have to ask if you were surprised."

Gabrielle placed the basket on the blanket and crawled over to be beside Xena on the log.

"How long have you been planning this little romantic get together?"

"Just since this morning. I had mentioned it to Ephiny and she took the ball and ran with it. Only Eponin wasn't too thrilled, especially when she found out how far she would have to pack me."

"Well, it worked," said Gabrielle.

The bard offered some assistance to the warrior as she lowered herself off the log and onto the layers of furs and blankets. Gabrielle immediately found her place next to Xena’s side. Tilting her blond head up, she placed a kiss on Xena's lips, enjoying the instant response she felt from her warrior. Xena reached out and pulled her bard closer to her. They were hungry, the days that had passed had not quenched the desire they craved for one another. Whether it was the fresh air or the build up of excitement, Xena wasn't sure, but she knew the self control they had both promised was slipping away. She could hear the soft whimpers of wanting coming from Gabrielle. The mere thought of those breast sent Xena's mind to another time and another place.

Flashes of memories slammed into her mind as an ache tore at her heart. Blood and lots of pain. She could physically feel the bard’s body in her hands, but the body of Gabrielle in her mind was in pain. Somehow she knew the body she was holding was dying. Fear and panic tore through Xena’s heart again, as she relived the thoughts of separation.

The bard instantaneously felt the change in Xena's body. The warrior’s muscles tightened and a shudder rippled over her bronze skin. Trepidation ran through Gabrielle as she wondered where her friend’s mind had gone. She cautiously pulled away from the wide-eyed warrior, but when she did, Xena's eyes focused back on her. The blue eyes instantly shimmered with tears.

"Xena?" Her fear changed to concern as she saw the pain and sadness in the warrior’s face.

"Oh Gabrielle ... you were hurt." The little blond’s blood ran cold as panic filled her. ‘Which vision did Xena just have?’ Her own thoughts went to when Xena had tried to kill her after Hope had killed Solan.

"It's ok, remember this is all in the past Xena. We got over it, you’re fine ... I'm fine." Gabrielle could feel her heart pounding the blood through her system. She held her breath and closed her eyes as she laid her head on Xena’s chest.

"It was a ... it was an arrow. A poison arrow, I remember. I had to fight some bad guys ... I had to fight a lot of bad guys. And you wouldn't let me take you away. You were dying and there was nothing I could do about it." Xena never noticed the relief that went through Gabrielle as she realized Xena was talking about their adventures outside of Tripolis. The warrior just kept talking, then she came to a sudden stop.

"I almost lost you ... again!"

"Yes, we've cheated Hades a few times, both of us."

The dark warrior fell silent, her arms wrapped tightly around her bard. Gabrielle relaxed and enjoyed the sound of Xena's heart. Listening intently to the rhythmic beat, she looked up at Xena when she felt the beat start to pick up speed.

"Are you ok?" She asked, suddenly worried about Xena’s health.

"I've made a decision." Xena declared in a low throaty voice

"And," asked Gabrielle. She wasn't at all comfortable with this.

Xena bent her head down and kissed Gabrielle with determined conviction. Gabrielle knew instantly what decision the warrior had just made.

"Xena, we have discussed this." The bard said pulling away reluctantly. It would have been so easy for her to give in. She wanted to feel the closeness they had once shared but she knew she had to be strong.

"Gabrielle, I couldn't love you more than I do right now. If there is one thing I know now that I didn't before, it's that life has no guarantees. Neither of us knows what tomorrow might bring ... I don't want to wait any longer. I think we have waited long enough." Xena pulled her lover back into her arms. The bard gave in for a brief moment and then placed a firm hand onto Xena’s chest.

"Stop, please." The warrior’s flushed face was knitted in confusion. "Xena, you don’t understand. There is a lot more that you don’t know."

"Then tell me."

"I can’t." Gabrielle looked to the skies for answers.

"We were lovers, were we not?"

"Yes."

"And whatever happened was in the past, right?"

"Yes." Gabrielle could hear her own mind and body agreeing with the raven haired woman.

"Then tell me now that you don’t love me. Tell me you don’t want this as much as I do." Xena feathered a kiss on Gabrielle’s lips. The bard felt her body quiver with her own desires.

"Whatever it is that you are afraid of, can’t be as bad as you make it out to be."

‘Oh yes it can be Xena. Oh yes it can.’

The warrior raised her hand and cupped the bard’s cheek. Nothing else was said as she brought Gabrielle’s lips to her own. Her eyes closed as she felt the want and desire of both of them. Xena’s kisses began to travel to Gabrielle’s neck, as the bard rolled her head back to give the warrior more access. A moan escaped from one of them, but neither knew from which. But it didn’t matter, Gabrielle knew she had lost, and won, as she gave into to her own hearts demands. Tilting her head back to her warrior, their lips meeting half way. Gabrielle's hand followed up Xena's shoulder, coming to a stop on the back of the raven hair. Slowly, she pulled down, bringing the full force of Xena's lips onto her own. Xena moaned in response. Having neither the strength nor physical ability to do everything she wanted, Gabrielle took the lead. Pulling and turning her warrior gently until the two were laid out side by side. Pure passion took over from there. As the kissing and groping reached new heights, Gabrielle was quickly without her top. Xena's leathers, on the other hand, had been a little more difficult. But where there is a will, there is a way, and the two lost lovers definitely had a will. Xena stared at the nude body of her Gabrielle.

"How could I forget something as beautiful as this?" said a husky voiced Xena as she traced her fingers around the bard’s parted lips. Looking into Gabrielle's face, Xena was delighted to see her blush. Gently pushing her warrior back onto the furs, Gabrielle began her slow, methodical trail of kisses. Starting with the splinted left leg kissing every wound and scar she could find, and she could find many. By the time she reached the warrior’s chest, Xena had claimed the perky right breast of Gabrielle. Caressing and massaging, sending wave after wave of pleasure through the little bard's body. Both women had wanted this to last, to be special. But their bodies hadn't forgotten what they already knew. Fingers reaching, tongues licking, and kisses of succulent pleasure. The warrior and her bard reached their point of release at the same time, calling for the other, as they clung together, united, as one ... at last. Pulling the furs around them, the two sexually spent women, drifted off to sleep.

Xena awoke to the sound of someone near. Feeling Gabrielle's nude body next to her own, the warrior struggled to focus on what had made that noise.

"You know, if you don't start eating properly, you're not going to get any better." Ephiny said as she took another bite into the apple she had in her hand.

Xena could only smile at the regent, Ephiny smiled back. She liked what she saw in the warrior’s blue eyes.

Gabrielle began to stir, and with a moan, she stretched and she snuggled closer to Xena as she opened her eyes. She smiled lazily at the Queen content with herself. But the moment was quickly lost when Gabrielle’s mind processed the information. The green eyes quickly slammed shut as she remembered the position she was in. Gabrielle pulled the furs up a little higher. She couldn’t believe they had been caught again by another Amazon.

"Ephiny ... what are you doing here?" Gabrielle said through slightly clenched teeth.

"Don't forget me." Both Xena and Gabrielle looked back over their heads to a smiling Jadax sitting on the log behind them.

"Oh, this is so humiliating, Xena do something," muttered the little red faced blond. "Not that," she yelled at the movement under the furs. The smiles and giggles from Jadax and Ephiny did nothing to improve Gabrielle’s embarrassment.

"Ok ... Ephiny could you toss me another apple, I seemed to have worked up an appetite." Xena smiled unashamed. She lifted her left hand out from under the furs to catch the incoming fruit. Gabrielle moaned and pulled the furs over her head.

The little bard soon realized her mistake. The heat generating under the fur was unbearable, and the lack of fresh oxygen made her decision all the more regrettable. So with all the dignity that a naked Queen could muster, she pulled back the covers.

"Did ya come up for food, or for air?" Ephiny was having way too much fun with this situation. She barely stifled a giggle at the Gabrielle expense as the regent bite loudly into her apple again.

Gabrielle just rolled her eyes. Much to the bard’s unhappiness, no one said a word as the three munched loudly on their apples. She folded her arms across her blanket-covered chest and refused to look at any of them. It didn’t matter, she knew they were enjoying her dilemma. No one made a move in the direction of leaving as Gabrielle sat and listened to the THREE of them eating, she soon decided she had had enough.

"All right, that's it. Do you think we could have some privacy so that we can make ourselves presentable?"

"Oh sure ... come on Jadax, the two love birds need to get dressed. You don't need a hand do you?" Ephiny asked. Gabrielle reached over and pulled the apple core from Xena's hand and threw it at the departing Queen. The blushing blond was certain Ephiny’s laughter could have been heard all the way back to the village.

"Why do I think this will be the talk of the village before we even get back?"

"So then, let's give them something more to talk about." Xena threw the furs back over their heads, Gabrielle erupted into a chorus of giggles.

The two were rarely seen outside of the palace. In actuality, they were rarely seen out of their bedroom. They spend most of their time talking. The rest was spent refreshing their memories. Learning every nook and cranny of each others bodies. Their bodies were new, and Xena had to start from scratch, something the warrior delighted in.

Gabrielle had to learn Xena's body all over again too, but not for the same reasons and at times it had been really hard. Xena knew this, she could see the apprehension in Gabrielle's eyes. But the warrior wouldn't let it go, if something bothered Gabrielle, Xena would make her look at it. Stare at it, and soon Gabrielle would reach out for the scar, and slowly begin to touch it. And in time she learned to caress it. When the little bard remembered how sensitive scars were, Xena had her hands full. Slowly the scars faded from Gabrielle's mind’s eye, all except the ones on her back and the one on her face. Gabrielle still couldn't bring herself to touch those. Xena hoped with time that she would, and maybe finally forgive herself.

The time was passing easier now, but the warrior's patience was starting to wear thin. Gabrielle had noticed how quickly she became angry at herself when she couldn't do something. The warrior who had been so independent, was still there. Xena hated to ask for any assistance. 'I can do it myself' was often heard loudly coming from their room.

This afternoon had been no different. Gabrielle had just returned to the room to find a wavering Xena out of her bed and half way to the window. Seeing the unsteadiness, she had rushed to Xena's side.

"Let me help you," she said, but the warrior gently removed the hand of assistance.

"I can do this on my own," the warrior remarked loudly, then quickly apologized. Two more stiff legged steps and Xena was hanging onto the window seat.

"Why won’t you let me help you? What happens if you fall?"

"Then I guess I get up and try again," the stubborn women said flatly.

Gabrielle could only shake her head. Xena was returning in every way, including her own stubborn pride of self reliance.

"It wouldn’t hurt you to ask for help you know," Gabrielle crossed her arms as she looked at the firm line of Xena’s lips.

"When I need it, I will ask for it."

"Yeah ... Just like you always do. Xena, I’m here to help in anyway that I can. Why won’t you let me?"

The raven haired woman didn’t answer right away, instead she turned her head to look out the window. Gabrielle waited for an answer, but there was only silence.

Out in the common room, Ephiny had heard the entire exchange. Pondering the thought, she quickly got up and left the palace.

"It was definitely time," she had said on her departure.

The room was quiet when Ephiny returned, the door was opened, so she proceeded in. Xena was sitting at the window seat still, her head was back and her eyes were closed. Gabrielle was sitting cross legged on the bed, deeply concentrating on her fingers nails.

"Knock, knock," said the regent. The warrior and the bard turned to see Ephiny and Belinda in the doorway.

"Ephiny brought to my attention that maybe it was time to remove your splints," Belinda said with a reassuring smile. She crossed the room and stood before the warrior.

"Now, before I do this, I need a promise, and remember Xena, I have witnesses," Belinda looked at Gabrielle and Ephiny.

"Promise me you won’t try to walk on your own right away. I have some sticks you can use for a few of days until some strength returns to your leg."

Xena only nodded at the healer. She pulled herself off the window seat and started to stand. She relaxed back on the seat and looked to Gabrielle. The bard only smiled as she crawled off the bed to assist Xena. Belinda backed away giving the bard room to move as she helped the tall warrior to the bed. Xena said nothing to Gabrielle as she moved to get comfortable, but the bard smiled and kissed her cheek. She pulled away and whispered. "That wasn’t that hard now, was it?"

Gabrielle knew the warrior enough to know that it had been, but she was grateful anyhow.

Xena turned her attentions to Belinda as she watched the healer cutting the leather of the splint that had bound her leg. Belinda stopped and looked back at Xena.

"Do I have your word?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we just get on with this?" The warrior was anxious to see her leg and her arm for the first time.

Belinda returned to the task at hand, but sent a word a caution to Xena. "They aren't going to look pretty, so keep that in mind." The healer lifted the splint away from the leg.

Xena looked down at her shriveled, white leg. Slowly she reached out and touched it with her fingers. An unfamiliar sensation went through her entire body. Xena closed her eyes and began to gently rub and scratch, a moan of pleasure escaping her lips.

The healer let the patient enjoy her moment, then she explained to her that she had to be careful, because her skin was very tender.

"It will take a couple of days for it to toughen up." Xena opened her eyes and watched as Belinda began to remove the splint from her arm. No one said anything as the wood was lifted to reveal a scrawny, deformed forearm. An arm they all knew would never return to its former glory.

"I'm sorry Xena. I did the best I could, but it had been broken too many times, and left unset for too long. There wasn't much I could do." It was Gabrielle who noticed the look, first of fear and then slow anger. The little bard knew Xena's mind was sending her pictures.

First she remembered them dragging her, her arm had already been broken. Then the image of her on the ground, her back was on fire. The pain of every whip mark seared into her mind, as she had tried to reach out. She recalled the sound of her arm breaking again under the weight of someone's boot. That was the man she had killed when she had escaped. She recalled the look in his eyes when she had pulled out his throat.

Looks were being passed from Ephiny to Belinda to Gabrielle. It was the regent who touched Belinda's arm and motioned for them to leave. Gabrielle had reached out to Ephiny's hand in a thank you gesture. Her green eyes never left Xena when the warrior had closed her eyes tightly and laid back on the bed.

Gabrielle waited, she knew it would come, but she knew she had to wait. The little bard held her breath as she saw Xena's neck muscles begin to tighten, sending forth a scream of agony. The torment of memories played vividly in her mind. The scream slowly died away and with it went the hopes and aspirations of the warrior princess. Without both of her arms she knew she would never be what she once was. Gabrielle knelt next to the bed and cautiously placed a caring hand on Xena’s mid section. She observed the muscles in the warrior’s neck and shoulders began to relax. The worst was over, and the bard could only watch as the tears fell from Xena’s closed eyes. Only then did Gabrielle climb onto the bed and gather her warrior into her arms. She held her lover, gently rocking and allowing the tears to flow.

Gabrielle had seen it coming. She knew now the difference between a good vision and a bad one. The good ones filled her heart with love and joy. The bad ones, well, the bad ones tore out her heart, most of the time sending fear throughout her body. Gabrielle would hold on, waiting to find out what horrors Xena's mind had remembered. Always hoping it wasn't the rift that nearly ended their friendship, and almost their lives.

The tears had stopped, but Xena had yet to speak Gabrielle knew she had to be patient, so she just continued to rock and kiss the raven hair.

"I think my arm was already broken before they found me." A whisper had finally broken the silence. "I remember being dragged behind a horse." Xena felt Gabrielle shudder, but she knew she needed to carry on. "Then I remember when they broke it again. It wasn't long after one of the times they had whipped me, because I remember the pain in my back."

Gabrielle could her the agony in Xena's voice, but when she continued, after pausing, the agony had been replaced with a growing anger. "But I got the bastard who did it the second time, he was one of the men who had been guarding me. I guess they had figured I wasn't much of a threat anymore, because it was only him watching me this time, and he had fallen asleep. I remember crawling out of camp on one hand and one knee, after having woken him up ... by removing his throat ... with my bare hands."

Gabrielle could see the rage burning inside those icy blues eyes. She swallowed as she remembered herself ... the destructive power her warrior lover could unleash on someone when she got angry.

Neither woman said anything, and after a while Gabrielle let loose her hold on Xena. Laying her softly on the bed, she leaned over and kissed her forehead, then turned to walk over to the dresser. She poured out some water into a bowl, collected a cloth, and then returned to the bed.

"May I?" The bard asked as she sat next to Xena's left leg. The warrior barely acknowledged her, so Gabrielle began. Ringing out the wet cloth, she laid it gently onto Xena's thigh. Slowly she wiped down six weeks of dirt, flaked skin and dried blood. Along with it went some of Xena's pain and anger. The more Gabrielle wiped, the more relaxed the warrior became. Xena noticed the fresh tingling of her skin. Gabrielle's touch had soothed away the anger, which was now being replaced with another, stronger emotion. By the time she had finished wiping down Xena's right arm, the warrior's heart was pounding wildly.

Gabrielle put the bowl onto the bedside table and looked up into Xena's lust filled eyes. She was slightly startled by what she saw. She hadn't meant to make this an erotic sponge bath ... or had she? She smiled at the thought.

"Xena, is sex the only thing on your mind?"

"It is right now," was all the warrior had to say.

As she had promised, Belinda was by the next day with a pair of walking sticks, showing Xena how they worked. She pleaded with her to just try them out in the bedroom until she was strong enough to venture out.

Xena couldn't wait. When Gabrielle had gone to fetch their breakfast the next morning, she returned to find the bedroom empty. Standing in the doorway, her mouth slightly opened, she heard a sound coming from the common room. She took a step backwards and saw a triumphant, smiling Xena, sitting on the bench in front of the firepit.

"So much for your word, Xena." Gabrielle said with raised eyebrows.

"What, I kept my word, I didn't leave the bedroom until I got the hang of these things, which I did. Well enough to get this far anyway." They turned at the sound of the royal bedroom door opening. Ephiny walked out looking for the source of the words she had heard from her bedroom.

"Didn't think you'd be staying in your room for long." The regent’s arms were crossed in front of her chest in mock anger. Finally breaking a smile, she walked closer to the warrior princess.

"Well, let's see how you’re doing?"

Xena collected the sticks and placed them under each arm. Though she was able to use both hands, it was plain to see her right was almost unless. Xena took a few halted steps away from them. It took everything Gabrielle had not to run to her side when Xena attempted to turn around and nearly fell. Ephiny had silently shaken her head at the bard.

"She needs to do this herself." Ephiny whispered to Gabrielle as she removed her hand from the bard’s arm.

The warrior negotiated the turn and was on her way back. Arriving in front of the two Queens, Xena stopped. Standing in place, the sticks under each armpit, she raised her arms out even with her shoulders. Xena smiled, "See!"

Gabrielle and Ephiny watched as her head dropped down to look at her legs. Suddenly it was as if something had physically hit her, and Xena’s body lurched in pain. An agonizing moan came from her chest as her knees started to buckle. The two Queens raced to her side, barely in time to catch her before she hit the floor.

Ephiny had her shoulders and Gabrielle her legs, as they lifted the unconscious Xena onto the bench.

"What in Tartarus just happened?"

"I'm not certain, but I have a good idea." Gabrielle stood up and left the common room, returning quickly with a bowl and a cloth. Kneeling down beside her fallen lover, the bard began to gently wipe Xena's face.

"Are you going to tell me, or do I have to wait until she does?"

Gabrielle spat out one word with all the anger and venom her hatred could produce. The name caused both women to shudder as they looked down at Xena.

"Caesar!"

Gabrielle continued to wipe the sweating twitching body of her companion. Xena’s moans and groans echoed the pain replaying in her mind. The pain of crucifixion, of having her legs broken, at the command of Caesar. Julius Caesar was one of the few people who had betrayed Xena and was still alive to continue his torment of her.

"Has she ever passed out like this before?" Ephiny asked with great concern.

"Yes, but not for this long, and not like this." She was interrupted by a sudden jump of Xena's body. A pain filled gasp followed as the blue eyes suddenly flashed open. Xena struggled to sit up as she stared down at her legs. Gabrielle was shocked to hear the warrior snarl.

"Caesar, you betraying, pompous, bastard." Xena looked over at the pale Gabrielle, "He had me staked ... then had my legs broken and left me there to die." The little blond could only nod. She recalled the role Julius Caesar had played in her own life. Because of him, and Xena’s hatred of the man, their lives had been forever changed. Gabrielle couldn’t help remembering the loss of her innocence, and all the horrors that followed.

Ephiny had stood in silence seeing everything with a regent's eye. She instantly knew what the fear was that had paled Gabrielle so. Ephiny was one of the very few that knew everything that had happened. She had been there when it finally came to a head. Ephiny subconsciously massaged her arm that had been broken by Xena not that long ago. She now knew what Gabrielle was so very afraid of. Ephiny herself had seen what an enraged warrior princess could do. The regent snapped back to reality, and looked down at her closest friends. She wondered if their relationship was strong enough to withstand all that pain and betrayal again.

"So this M'Lila fixed my broken legs?"

"No, she brought you to Nicklio. He fixed your legs. M'Lila taught you your pinch and some of your fighting techniques," said Gabrielle.

"My what?... My pinch?" Xena said with a look of confusion.

Ephiny decided this was where she needed to come in.

"Xena, do you remember our discussion about the chakram?"

"Yeah,"

"Well, the pinch goes under the same rule. You're not to use it until you remember how!"

"Ok, fine. But what is it?"

"It's this thing you do ... you stop the flow ... " Gabrielle was cut off by a wide-eyed Xena.

"Flow ... of blood to ... the ... brain ... I remember ... I remember, Gabrielle. M'Lila, she was on my ship, and ... she was hiding from Caesar. We couldn't speak to each other, we didn't know the others language. Then she dragged me up to this mountain after Caesar had my legs broken ... Oh Gabrielle, I remember." Xena smiled as she threw her arms around her friends. Pulling away she began to hit at the air with her fingers, putting the pinch on the air. As she started to look around for something to put her pinch on, Gabrielle and Ephiny physically leaned away. Xena's eyes fell to her own legs.

"Xena I wouldn't ..." but Gabrielle was too late.

Whap Whap went the fast bronze fingers into her own thigh.

"Oooowwwweee."

Whap Whap the pinch was released.

"Ok, no pinch. I agree, no more pinch," she said rubbing her tingling thigh. Gabrielle looked closely over at Xena. If she hadn't of known better, she would have sworn it was Meg sitting there with that goofy, cockeyed grin.

The three sat talking all morning and most of the afternoon. Nothing else seemed to trigger any other memories. Every now and then Xena had stood, hobbling about the room, trying her leg out. Finally, in the late afternoon, Gabrielle convinced Xena she had done enough. Xena had winked at her and turned herself in the direction of the bedroom. The bard stood to join her.

"Ah Xena, Gabrielle will be in shortly." Ephiny looked straight into the green eyes, "I need to talk to her."

Xena had hollered ‘ok’ as they heard the bed groan with the weight of the warrior.

"Follow me please." Ephiny headed into her own bedroom, a slightly confused Gabrielle followed right behind her.

Ephiny sat down on the bed and waited for Gabrielle to join her.

"Let's cut right to it. I think you’re making another big mistake. I think you should tell her about Solan and what happened at the centaur village. All of it, including Hope."

Gabrielle dropped her head in silence, all the fears of their past weighed heavy on her soul.

"I can't, Ephiny."

"You have to. If she has the information, but not the memory, at least the two of you will be prepared when it does come back. And we both know it will."

"But what if she can't forgive me this time? We don't have Illusia to bring us together again." Gabrielle felt the hopelessness of the situation and the foreboding in her mind.

"You have the love you two share. It blossomed after Illusia. You two discovered your true feelings for each other after all that happened. You have to believe your love will be strong enough again, Gabrielle."

She remained quiet for a moment, Ephiny reached out and rubbed her back.

"But what if it's not? I can't live without her, Eph. Without her I'm lost. I'm empty. I don't exist."

As Gabrielle said the words, Ephiny recalled hearing them before. Last time, it was Aphrodite who had said, ‘that without one the other would die’. She had seen with her own eyes what had happened when they had been separated. But it didn’t stop the feeling of a pending doom in the regent’s heart.

"So then what, you're just going to wait and see. Gabrielle, sooner or later she is going to remember."

"I know that." Gabrielle’s voice echoed the despair she had in her heart. She stood and started to leave.

"Tell her Gabrielle, for both your sakes." The bard left never acknowledging Ephiny's final plea.

Days later, Xena was standing tall with her walking sticks. The woman of many skills had accomplished another one. But that didn’t stop the heated discussion that was going on.

"But how far is it?" Xena asked Gabrielle again.

"It's too far Xena, and most of it is up hill. Why don’t we wait just a few more days? Your leg will be stronger then. You won’t be able to make it that far."

"Well, I guess I won’t know until I try. So let's go." Xena turned and hobbled out the door, the determination set firmly on her face. Gabrielle should have known better than to tell the warrior that there was something she couldn’t do.

"Where are you two heading off to?" Ephiny asked from her chair in the common room.

"The hot pools," stated the warrior firmly.

"That's quite a ways you know."

"So I have heard ... all morning." Xena's determination showed clearly on her face.

She had enough. The frustration of her limitations was something she couldn’t deal with. Never before had she had difficultly with anything physical, now all of a sudden, there were many things she could no longer do. First she had tried to handle her sword again. That had been a disaster. It just kept falling out of her crippled hand. Then she had tried some of her exercises that Belinda had given her, but she still couldn't even make a fist. That old familiar anger had been boiling under the surface and the warrior knew she had to get out. Xena hoped a little fresh air, and maybe a little fun, would release some of her pent up anger.

On a thought she had mentioned the hot pools to Gabrielle. The bard had immediately said it was too far and she couldn't make it. Well, the bard should have known better than to tell Xena she couldn't do something. Now only Tartarus or Hades himself was going to stop Xena from making it up the hill to the hot pools.

Xena turned back to the door way, "You are coming, aren't you?"

"Yes, I was just getting some towels. Let's go." Gabrielle was still muttering about the thickness of Xena's head when she opened the back door for the stubborn, hobbling warrior.

It took a full candlemark but they finally made it. They had to stop frequently for Xena to catch her breath, or just to sit and let some color return to her beautiful, but pale face. Gabrielle had tried to talk her into to the lower pool that everyone used, but no, Xena wanted the Royal hot pool. 'For privacy' she had said with an impish grin and a wink.

Removing only their boots, they sat for a while just letting their legs dangle in the warm pool. Gabrielle hadn't noticed Xena staring into the water, until the low voice of the warrior spoke.

"I like to fish," she stated.

"Yes, you do ... But you don't fish like most people."

"No, don't tell me ... I listen for them." Xena's smile lite up her face. She turned and planted a kiss square onto Gabrielle's slightly parted lips.

"I listen for them ... but sometimes ... I catch them ... with a parchment." Xena looked to Gabrielle for clarification.

"That," said Gabrielle laughing, "is a whole different story."

At Xena’s urging the bard began to tell the story of when they had been victims of Aphrodite's handy work. Gabrielle had been infatuated with, well with herself, and Xena had been infatuated with fishing.

Xena was roaring with laughter by the time the bard had finished. Trying to gain some control again Xena turned and asked. "I kinda remember, I remember the fish ... and I remember my brother." A distant smile brought on by warm memories was now on the warrior's face.

"But there was someone else there. Some guy acting like a monkey?"

"That’s Joxer, he's a friend ... well kinda. No, he's a friend." Gabrielle tried to explain exactly who the bumbling wannabe warrior was.

Xena just shook her head. "Nothing. I don't remember him at all. I mean, I've seen him in some of my visions but I can't say I remember him, or that I feel anything for him"

"That doesn't surprise me, Xena. I wouldn't say you had a lot of feelings for Joxer. I would only say you tolerate him at best."

"Oh." Xena nodded, setting her eyes back onto the rolling waters of the hot pool.

Silence fell comfortably between them, until Xena slid forward and stood up in the water.

"Can I get a hand, this leather thing is comfortable enough, but it's a bitch to get on and off.?"

Gabrielle slid in behind Xena, still seated on the edge of the hot pool. She untied them and began to carefully lift off Xena's leathers. The little blond’s eyes followed the outfit up and over Xena's head. Then by habit, her eyes traveled back down the naked body. Her eyes were now only inches from the scars on her warrior's back.

Xena realized what had just happened and stood in silence. Gabrielle slowly reached out and placed her fingers on the raised scars that criss-crossed the warrior’s back. Xena held her breath at the touch but said nothing. She felt the fingers slowly tracing along the lines and she knew without looking there were tears falling from the green eyes.

Slowly the warrior turned to face her lover. Gabrielle looked up at her as Xena reached to wipe away the tears.

"They will heal and they will fade ... if you let them. All wounds will heal if you don't pick at them or think about them too often."

Gabrielle’s stomach flipped as she stared into the icy blue eyes. Those had been her words to Xena the last time the two had shared a hot spring. Gabrielle reached over and threw her arms around Xena's neck. The warrior happily returned the embrace, holding Gabrielle tight was one of the things she enjoyed the most. She rubbed her hands over Gabrielle's still clothed back. "This would be a lot more fun if you didn't have your clothes on."

The little blond sniffled a laugh. Releasing her embrace she leaned back and pulled her Amazon robe off over her head. Xena smiled as she looked down at the finely toned body of her bard. Reaching forward to take a hold of Gabrielle's hands, Xena leaned back, pulling her bard with her. They let the warm water break their fall. Her little Amazon Queen held tightly now, against her chest. The two lovers laughed and frolicked in the water.

To Gabrielle, it felt like old times. To Xena, it just felt good. She literally couldn't remember her last real bath.

Without words, Gabrielle reached out for one of the sponges that lay around the edge of the pool. With a gentle hand on Xena's shoulder, she turned the warrior around. Looking over the scars, she dipped the sponge into the warm water and began to deal with her loathing of her lover’s wounds. Xena began to purr, enjoying the intense feeling the water had on her back. Closing her eyes, she smiled and quietly asked,

"Are you sitting on the soap?"

The sponge stopped and Gabrielle leaned around to look into her face. "Xena?"

One eye opened, and with a grin the warrior filled the bard's face with a splash of water. As per usual the water fight was intense, but with no real winner ... or loser. Still laughing and gasping for air, the two leaned back against the edge of the pool.

"What did you remember?"

"Minya, Howar ... and someone nailing me in the nose with her staff." Xena looked over at Gabrielle, who immediately scooted away from the warrior. Xena laughed at the action of the offender.

The laughter died down as Xena looked up to the blue sky. Gabrielle observed as Xena’s playful expression turned serious. She watched and waited for any sign of a flash of memory, but Gabrielle saw no sign of one. All she could see was a perplexing expression on the warrior’s features as a serious thought clouded her face.

"It's funny. They're are times when everything is clear, crystal clear, and I remember it all. The people, the feelings, the sights, the sounds, everything. But they're are times when I only see an image, and I don't know who they are, or what is happening. Or I see something and I feel that I know it, but nothing comes. There is no memory of it. Sometimes it’s a smell or just a feeling ..."

Gabrielle could see the frustration and anguish growing on Xena's face. She stood and moved her way through the water, to stand in front of her warrior. Gabrielle took Xena's face into her hands.

"Am I just an image?" She asked softly.

"No Gabrielle, you're a vision. A beautiful vision." Xena leaned her head forward pressing her lips firmly onto those of her lover. It was slow and it was passionate, as the two bodies rolled and turned in the buoyancy of the warm water, their love for each other cascading over their bodies. Climaxing with the rush of heat and passion that no hot pool could match. Their lovemaking over, the two women relaxed, cradled in each other’s arms.

Xena reached for the sponge and began squeezing rivers of warm water down Gabrielle's back. Keeping her eyes closed, the bard turned giving Xena full access to the milky white skin. Collecting more water into the sponge, the blues eyes traveled with the flow of the water over the bard’s back.

"Where did these scars come from?" Gabrielle's eyes snapped open in fear at Xena’s innocent question.

"I fell on some rocks not too long ago." She closed her eyes, hoping and praying the next question would not come. It didn't, only the sound of splashing water was heard, until Gabrielle heard something far worse.

Xena was humming as the sponge was moving in circles. She was humming one of the songs she had sung to Gabrielle while they were in Illusia.

Gabrielle stood up quickly, almost knocking Xena over. Swallowing hard, she stated quickly,

"I think we should start to head back. It'll probably take us even longer to get back than it did to get here."

"Ahh ... are you sure you want to? I kinda enjoy the freedom of the water." Xena was flirting, but she quickly noticed it was having no effect on her little friend. Looking a little closer she now saw something had spooked Gabrielle. When the green eyes saw the blues eyes staring, Gabrielle flashed a smile and turned to exit the hot pool. Grabbing a towel, she dried herself briefly, then handed Xena her own towel.

Gabrielle was dressed by the time Xena had dried herself. It took the two of them to dress the warrior princess. Xena was very aware of the lack of communication between them. She could still see the look of terror on Gabrielle’s face, but the bard said nothing.

When Gabrielle handed Xena her walking sticks and turned to go, the warrior reached out and grabbed the bard’s shoulder.

"Did I say something wrong?" She looked deep into Gabrielle eyes hoping for the truth.

"No, of course not. I'm just concerned about you getting back. I know I can't pack you."

Xena could see Gabrielle was trying hard to act like nothing had happened. Her warrior instincts told her something had. But she knew she didn't know what. She realized it might be better to drop it ... for now.

Handing one of the walking sticks back over to the bard, she put her arm around Gabrielle's neck.

"Between the two of us, I know we can make it home, together." Xena placed a small kiss on Gabrielle's cheek, hoping she had heard the double meaning in her words.

With each passing day Xena’s mobility and strength improved. Bits and pieces of memory were falling into place, but Xena still didn't know what had scared Gabrielle so bad that day at the hot pools. She had thought about mentioning it to either Jadax or Ephiny, but decided maybe she should keep it between her and Gabrielle.

She still hadn't recalled anything more about the men who had kidnaped and beat her, much to the unhappiness of some of the warriors in the village. It was no secret, neither Eponin nor Nazalon were going to give up on trying to find those men. Both warriors had been seriously reprimanded by the Queen for leaving Amazon soil without permission in search of the animals. It had been tough for Ephiny to do, to punish her two best warriors, especially knowing that if she didn't have the responsibility of being Queen, she probably would have joined them. Eponin and Nazalon were now confined to the village, a sentence they thought was too severe. When Ephiny stated if they ignored that direct order they would be confined to their huts, under guard no less, both Amazons knew their Queen was deadly serious.

Nazalon was almost going crazy. She hated not being allowed to go into the forest. She hated being in her own hut, knowing how close she had come, and how quickly she had lost, Gabrielle. She was happy for the two of them, which made her loss even more unbearable. Add to it the inability to find anything on the men that had taken and beaten the warrior princess. She was like a caged animal. It had been Eponin who had suggested the idea. And since the quiet warrior sometimes pulled Royal guard duty it had been easy for her to smuggle out the dark warrior's property.

Eponin herself had filled some of her time working with the recovering Xena.

Her leg had been healing fine, but much to Xena's unhappiness, the injured right hand and arm were pretty much useless. The hand couldn't even hold the sword itself, not to mention the fact that the arm could barely handle the weapon’s weight. Xena had many a frustrating day down at the training ground. Try as she might, she was beginning to realize she would have to become a left-handed warrior. This, in itself, wasn't that hard as Xena had been an accomplished sword master with both hands. No, what had been difficult, was for the dark warrior to admit there were now things she no longer could do. On many occasions Eponin had been on the receiving end of Xena's anger and frustration.

Today had been no exception.

Eponin could see the anger building in Xena's eyes. The warrior princess leaned over to retrieve the dropped sword, again. Picking it up off the red soil with her left hand, she placed it into her right. Pushing the hilt tightly into the palm, then curling her stiff right fingers around the leather with her left hand. Raising her arm up, she tried again the simple maneuver of a rotating downward stroke. Eponin watched as the sword fell again.

Quickly walking to her side, Eponin grasped Xena’s left arm before the sword could be thrown in anger.

"I think that's about it for today." Eponin said looking straight into the reddened face of the warrior princess. Xena looked down at the ground, trying to contain her anger and frustration before looking up.

"I still can't even hold the stupid thing," she said between clenched teeth.

"Xena, it hasn't been that long. You have to give it some time." The warrior princess just shook her head and pressed the sword hilt back into her right hand.

Five more attempts and five more times the sword dropped to the ground. Eponin had seen enough. She extracted her own sword off her back and approached the warrior princess. Xena saw her coming, and was astonished to see Eponin's sword at the ready.

Eponin stared into the raging blues eyes and lunged. Simple survival instincts took over the warrior princess. Eponin barely saw the sword switch hands but she felt the clash as Xena's sword struck back. The battle was on. Warrior against warrior, anger against compassion. Metal to metal, the clanging echoed around the training grounds. The ability was there to beat the Amazon, but it was dwindling as Eponin sapped the strength from the recovering Xena. It didn't matter. Eponin knew, if she continued, she could have beaten her friend and comrade, for the first time. But that wasn't the point of the exercise. Eponin slowly dropped her sword and the battle was over. Her point had been proven.

"With your left hand Xena, you could still take anyone in this village, myself included." The realization of those words was not lost on the warrior princess.

"Thank you, Eponin. I know what you were trying to prove."

"And with more time Xena, your endurance and strength will return."

"And my timing?" The doubt was evident in Xena’s voice.

"Your timing, your moves, and I'm sure soon your kicks and flips."

The warrior princess stared deep into the Amazon's eyes and said flatly,

"Everything but ... my right arm!"

Eponin said nothing. She knew there was nothing to say. She could only watch as her friend limped from the training ground. The dejection was obvious by the unusual slump in her broad shoulders. Eponin hoped the warrior princess would once again return to the training grounds.

The two Queens were sitting on the front step of the palace enjoying their afternoon of leisure. Gabrielle had her head back and her eyes closed.

"I could get used to this, Eph."

"The afternoon sun or lazing around in one place?" Ephiny said with closed eyes and a smile.

"Both. Traveling does get tiresome sometimes."

"Maybe you two need to think about settling down somewhere." Ephiny opened her eyes and looked over at her friend.

"I don’t think so. Xena doesn’t like to be in one place for too long."

"But things are a little different now, are they not?"

Something caught Ephiny’s eyes, and she tapped the blond's shoulder.

"That doesn't look good." Gabrielle opened her eyes to see her very dark, smoldering warrior princess heading into the back door of the palace.

"Where was she?" Ephiny asked to the rising bard

"Down at the training grounds with Eponin." Gabrielle had just opened the front door when she heard the crash come from their bedroom.

"It obviously wasn't a good day." Ephiny commented to Gabrielle's departing backside.

The bard walked into the bedroom and looked down at the shattered remains of the chair on the floor. She looked up at the fuming warrior.

"Did that make you feel any better?" Her hands rested on her hips as she looked up at Xena with raised eyebrows.

"Yes!" Xena said and picked up the other chair and threw it against the wall.

Gabrielle’s arms crossed against her chest.

"Between you and Eponin, I don't know why we even bother to have chairs in here."

There was no comment from the raven haired women. Gabrielle could see she was still seething. Feeling the green eyes on her, Xena turned and limped toward the window seat. She sat down and looked out the window.

Gabrielle chewed on her lip pondering what to say. Xena's anger still frightened her and she knew it. There was always a chance one wrong question or statement could set off Xena's mean, dark side. But she knew she had to find out what had happened today.

As she took a step closer, she could see the shimmer of tears starting in the blue eyes. Her fear dissolved and was instantly replaced with compassion.

"Xena, what's wrong? What happened?" Gabrielle knelt next to Xena's pale leg.

No words were said as the warrior placed her hand on the blond hair.

"Xena?" she said softly.

Finally the silence was broken by a whisper

"What am I if not a warrior?" The simple words broke Gabrielle's heart.

She stood and wrapped her arms around her. Gabrielle said nothing at first. Then tilted her head and spoke into Xena's raven hair.

"You'll always be my warrior, Xena. My warrior, my lover and my friend." Xena said nothing. She just buried her head further into Gabrielle's chest.

"I guess your day at the training grounds was not a great success." There was no response.

"Xena, its going to take some time. You're going to have to learn some patience."

"I have many skills, but patience is not one of them." Gabrielle couldn't help but smile hearing Xena use one of her favorite comments about herself.

"Then tell me, many skills, warrior woman, is your sword only made for right-handed warriors?"

"No, You can use it for both hands!" Xena was irked at the stupidity of the comment.

"Have you not been working on your left hand with Eponin?"

The red eyed woman lifted her head, and smirkingly said, "actually, I kicked her butt left handed today. Well I was kicking her butt, but ..." Gabrielle cut her off.

"Then what's with all the chair smashing, and the 'What will I be if not a warrior'."

The cocky grin disappeared off Xena’s face and she turned to look out the window. Gabrielle watched as the muscles in Xena’s neck flexed as she worked her jaw back and forth. The blue eyes steeled before the warrior spoke.

"What happens if my right arm and hand never work again?"

"Then use your left." Gabrielle said simply. "The only thing you need to use both hands for is to hold me ... and Xena, I have no complaints so far," she bent down and kissed Xena's on the lips.

"Is that all that's been bothering you?" Gabrielle questioned.

Xena took in a big breath and looked out the window.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking."

"And?"

"Obviously it was being a warrior that put me in this predicament. It was being a warrior that has gotten us into so much trouble." Xena turned her head back and looked into Gabrielle's eyes.

"Every time I've seen an image of you ... you're hurt and injured ..." The warrior swallowed and then continued, "or dead and dying in my arms. It has been because I'm a warrior."

"Xena, you are a warrior," Gabrielle spoke softly. "That's part of who you are. Just like your dark side, it's what makes you ... you. And all of it makes up the woman that I love, the person I’m honored to call friend."

Their faces only inches apart, Gabrielle could still see the pain and regret in Xena’s eyes.

"I may not always agree with you, and I may not always like what I see." The green eyes left their hold on the pools of blue, and slowly traveled down the scar on Xena's face. "But all of it is you and I have to learn to deal with some of the things that I don't like. Underneath it all you are still Xena, warrior princess." Gabrielle leaned in and placed a soft kiss on the scar of her lover. Pulling slowly away she added, "and I love you ... all of you."

Lying snuggled under the blankets that afternoon. Xena’s fingers were playing with Gabrielle's bangs. Out of the blue Xena asked,

"Who's Hope?" Gabrielle's universe came crashing down. Images began to flash in her mind of her child, her dead child, her demon daughter. Their lies and betrayals had almost cost them their lives, that painful day on the bluff when Xena had tried to kill her, and she had tried to kill them both.

Xena knew from the sudden stiffening of the body next to her, that this was not a simple question. She had not anticipated the answer that Gabrielle finally spoke.

"She was my daughter." Xena shot up in bed so fast it scared the little blond. The blue eyes were opened wide in amazement.

"You have a daughter? ... You're just telling me now that you have a daughter."

Gabrielle wanted to scream. She didn't want to live through this again, any of it. The memory of what she had done, of what Hope had done, and of what Xena had done to her. Her heart was beating so hard she was afraid it might burst through her aching chest.

She looked at the face of the woman she loved. Her mouth felt very dry as she tried to pull some oxygen into her burning lungs.

"I had a daughter," She studied Xena's face for any sign or remembrance. So far there was none.

"You had a daughter?" Xena struggled for a memory, but her mind was blank. She felt confused at the information just now being told to her.

Gabrielle slid from the bed and reached for her discarded robe. Xena watched her with a knitted brow.

"She's dead." Gabrielle's tears fell. She now knew what she had to do. Pandora’s box was open and there was no way she could avoid the inevitable.

"I killed her." The statement hung in the air. A sob broke from Gabrielle's chest and Xena assumed it was for her lost child, not for what she was about to do.

Xena crawled to the edge of the bed as Gabrielle took a step away. She stopped and looked at her pretty blond friend, the confusion in her mind showed clearly on her face. Not knowing what else to do, she reached for her leathers and started to dress. She needed time to think about what Gabrielle had said. She could feel her body starting to shake.

Gabrielle watched her the whole time, waiting. Waiting for the explosion of memories and emotion, but so far the warrior was calm, confused, but calm. An unmistakable look of loss and puzzlement was on her face.

Xena finally finished dressing and turned to Gabrielle who was standing next to the window. The warrior was keenly aware of the distance between them. She took a step toward her friend and lover, and was startled to see the blond stiffen. Xena stopped in question.

"Gabrielle, I don't understand, I don't remember. Why did you have to kill your own child?"

A very nervous Gabrielle stood staring back at Xena. She knew she was playing with fire and anything she said could set it off. A word. A name.

"The first time or the second time?" Gabrielle said clearly as she waited. Nothing.

"A second time?" Xena was very unsettled. 'How do you kill someone twice?' She thought.

"The second time she was trying to kill you ... " The green eyes stared into the blue, but still there was nothing. Gabrielle’s nerves were becoming a coiled spring as she waited for her life to shatter.

"Think Xena, ... Callisto! ... Ares! ... Dahak!" The simple mention of his name sent shivers down her spine.

Xena saw the shudder and noticed the goose bumps on Gabrielle's skin. The tall warrior shook her head. "Nothing."

Gabrielle swallowed hard, then quietly whispered, "please remember ... that I love you."

Xena's eyebrow's knitted with concern as she felt a tremor go through her body. She never noticed the hairs on the back of her neck were standing straight up.

Gabrielle could feel her chest tightening. She drew in a desperate breath and stated.

"Hope was a demon. Her father was Dahak, pure evil and darkness itself."

Xena felt something rising in her chest, something she wasn’t sure of. Her breath was leaving her lungs as her mind began to clear.

"Why did you kill her the first time?" Xena asked hesitantly. The heat was rising from the pit of her stomach, as the agony tore at her heart. The warrior’s insides were starting to churn and roll.

Gabrielle never felt the tears running down her face. She never heard herself whisper 'goodbye.' All that she would remember was the reaction from the woman that she loved when she finally said,

"Hope killed your son, Xena"

The entire Amazon village heard Xena scream out Solan's name.

To be concluded in Part VI, the Final chapter of ...

Remember, Never to Forget by Sinful

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