True Colours, Part 4

Chapter 10

The next day Erin was on kitchen duty when she saw the vet pull up outside the house. Her thoughts immediately turned to the conversation she had had with Paula on the couch last night, or rather lack of it. Yep, love is definitely in the air. As Mare walked into the kitchen, Erin turned from the counter with a welcoming grin, and waved the knife she was using to slice tomatoes onto sandwiches. "Hi, Mare. You're just in time for lunch… almost. TJ's still in her office. I'll get you when it's ready." You go enjoy yourself and cheer up TJ who's been moping after you all morning.

"Hi, Erin. Thanks. Everything okay?"

Erin's smile dimpled. "Everything's fine." She'd been thinking about something for a while and figured she might as well say it. "Your coming here to visit with TJ sure has given her a boost. Which gives Paula and me a boost, too. Thanks a lot." And that cute smile of yours cheers us all up. Erin chuckled to herself as Mare grinned acknowledgement and headed toward the office. I know it does a little more than that for TJ. You brought that woman back to life.

Once TJ's icy reserve had been cracked a bit, she and Mare had become friends. The vet had been stopping by on a regular basis, sometimes just briefly, sometimes for a longer visit. TJ had filled her in on the plans for the ranch and the plant and often asked Mare's opinions on various phases as they were implemented. Now they were trading thoughts about if and how the water was poisoned, and what to do about it. The town council had already notified District 6's Clean Water branch of the EPA about possible problems and they were to send a team to investigate.

Mare rapped on the office door and stepped in.

TJ smiled and waved her in. "C'mere. The photographer just brought the aerial photos of the ranch." The desktop was covered with 8-1/2 x 11" pictures, in color. "Those show the two streams where Erin found the dead fish, but, look, here's the lake I was telling you about."

The golden-haired vet walked behind the desk, to the left of TJ, and leaned her elbows onto one of the few bare spaces on the oaken surface. She swung her right arm forward and rested her fingers on the bottom edge of the picture TJ was pointing to. "That is breathtaking!" Mare tilted her head and looked at TJ's profile as the dark-haired woman concentrated on the photo. And so are you.

Mare didn't have the courage to say the words aloud. She recognized that her feelings for TJ were growing stronger day by day. Once she had gotten past her unfair antagonism toward the woman, she had embarked on discovering who she was. The more she learned about this complex and intriguing person, the closer she wanted to be to her. Both as a friend and… Do I dare imagine being any closer? How do I know if she even would want to be close in that way? I know Erin and Paula are a couple, but would TJ be open to that? Hell, I'm afraid to even take the chance. I'm willing to settle for friendship if nothing more ever develops. I just want to be near her.

TJ reached up to slide the picture closer to Mare and her arm touched Mare's arm. The contact sent a jolt through the vet and she snatched her arm away before she could stop herself.

TJ's words froze in the middle of a sentence. Her lips twisted and her shoulders slumped. She can't even stand for me to touch her. Then, what the hell did that kiss mean? Just when I think maybe I can safely lower some barriers, I get a "reality check" slap in the face. Maybe I've read her wrong. Sure wouldn't be the first time. Let's face it, most of the world leans the other way. Or maybe it's because I'm crippled. That would be tough for anyone to handle.

Mare was suddenly aware that snatching her arm away had somehow hurt TJ. Without a word, she slid her left hand under TJ's palm and put her right hand on top of the long fingers.

TJ stared at their hands and forced a rasp through her tight throat. "Is my touch so repulsive to you?" Wounded blue eyes swung toward the vet, who gasped when they struck her, and startled green eyes brimmed with sudden tears. Oh, TJ, if you only knew… when you are so near, I yearn for you to touch me. I'm just not sure of what you want, or whether you're even attracted to me.

Mare turned around, facing straight at the side of the wheelchair. She lifted the strong hand she was holding and placed it over her thudding heart. "Repulsive?" A tear trickled down her face, and she half laughed and half cried as she struggled to talk. The door she thought she had closed on her emotions sprung open and so unhinged Mare that she threw caution to the winds. "Don't you know I'm falling in love with you?" Leaning down, she pressed her lips to a surprised TJ's slightly parted mouth, then just as quickly she drew back in embarrassment. "Look, I'm sorry… maybe I'm presuming something I shouldn't…" Mare, you idiot! You've shocked the woman. You'll be lucky if she doesn't throw you out.

Wide blue eyes stared at her, giving nothing away. Mare couldn't tell that TJ's heart was hammering even harder than her own, or that her mind was going a mile a minute. That's twice she's kissed me. Maybe she's just flirting. Do I dare hope? She has no idea what loving me means. Would she turn away in disgust from the tubes and bags that are part of my life now? Could she handle that? Damn it, could I handle it?

But how can I turn my back on this woman? I think I'm falling in love with her, too. If I'm ever going to have any kind of relationship with her, I will have to learn to handle it… and hope that she can learn, too. These thoughts charged through TJ's mind in a matter of seconds and she made her decision. She chose to take a chance on love right now and leave worries to be tended to later.

Mare still held TJ's hand against her heart. Entwining her long fingers in the material of Mare's shirt, TJ gently pulled her back into a longer kiss… and ice turned to fire.

Mare was a lightning rod and TJ's tongue was the bolt. Unprepared for the strength of her own reaction, or that of TJ's, Mare pulled her lips away to draw a ragged breath. That sure killed any of my doubts! She released TJ's hand, which moved to push the side handle of the wheelchair out of the way. Then TJ looked up at Mare and raised her arms in invitation. The golden-haired woman slipped into the open arms and gently sat on her lap.

TJ's magnificent eyes caressed the young vet's face. Is it safe to believe that she enjoyed that as much as I did?

Mare raised her fingers to the gorgeous face, stroking along the perfect cheekbone, the strong jaw. She smiled a little self-consciously then took the plunge. "Can we try that again?" So they did. In the circle of each other's arms, their bodies alight with the warmth of touching for the first time, they shed their reticence and lost themselves in the sweet passion of the kiss. Mare tilted her head back as she surrendered to the pressure of TJ's searching mouth. Oh, TJ, I want to stay right here in your arms forever.

The dark-haired woman's long-dormant aggressiveness was slowly awakening. She was elated, and her hands yearned to show Mare the pleasure she knew she was capable of giving her, but she held back. Careful, TJ. Don't scare her away. She's too precious to risk losing because of your eagerness. Let her needs dictate the pace.

As they interrupted the exploring of their kiss, Erin knocked and opened the door. Her eyebrows shot up and a delighted smile stretched across her face. "Er… do you uh… still want lunch?"

TJ waggled an eyebrow and beamed. "I think we'll eat in here if you…"

Mare put a hand over TJ's mouth and shook her head, her passion still evident in her breathless voice. "No, I have to make some calls right after lunch. We better go to the kitchen," she said with a low laugh, "or I might never get out of here." Erin nodded and hurried back to the kitchen, eager to pass some happy news on to Paula.

TJ kissed Mare's fingers then the vet stood up and made an attempt to calm herself while TJ resettled the chair arm. Walking behind the chair to escort her to the kitchen, Mare thought a neutral subject might be in order, so she asked a question that had been on her mind for awhile. "How come you don't use an electric wheelchair?"

TJ felt as if her heart had grown too large for her chest and she grinned, understanding Mare's obvious move to quiet her emotions. "Well, when you gals aren't pushing my chair around, my pushing it gives me a lot of upper body exercise and I want to keep strong. I have an electric one in the garage that I use in the city. Besides, this one is absolutely quiet."

"Oh, so you like quiet, huh?" Mare knew she herself was anything but quiet.

TJ's long arm reached behind her and laid her hand on Mare's as it rested on the chair back. "Not always."

The vet blew a small laugh through her nose. "Glad to hear that." With a singing heart, she bent down and dropped a quick kiss on TJ's hand, then pushed her on into the kitchen for lunch.

********************

Lunch started off as a quiet affair, Erin and Paula trying desperately to hide their amusement at TJ and Mare who were constantly looking at each other from the corners of their eyes. Fleeting smiles crossed their faces whenever their eyes connected, but they eventually settled down and conversation picked up. Mare asked about the results on the water samples that had been e-mailed to TJ that morning.

"So, what is it in the water supplies?" Good idea. Ask a question. It gives you a great excuse to look at that beautiful face a little longer

TJ sat back, chewing absently on her bread roll before answering. "Bit of a mixture of stuff: industrial slurry from some production process, various types of oil. The boys at the lab seem to think it can be cleaned up if we can find the source of the contamination, though it may take a few weeks. I have a cleanup team coming in today. They’ll work up the watercourse and find what’s causing it. Chances are it’s someone dumping illegally out of Sharlesburg."

"You know there’s a meeting in the town hall tonight? The Mayor is going to tell us what the EPA is going to be doing." Mare looked at Paula and Erin to see if they knew about it, but from the blank looks on their faces she knew they didn’t. "It might be a good idea if you came along."

********************

The meeting had been going on for an hour and nothing had been sorted out yet, Mare was getting bored. All they were doing was going round in circles. The EPA had sent out its scientists and samples had been taken. Big deal. TJ already has the results. I was kinda hoping she would turn up for this. Still, I doubt she would have had a good reception. Apart from the fact that they were going to monitor the town's water supply, they couldn’t do much more.

Resources were in short supply. The agency said if the contamination turned out to be a threat then maybe a cleanup team would arrive within the next few days. And TJ’s is already at the ranch. Though I guess if her team finds the source of the problem and removes it, she’ll solve the town’s problem for them without the agency knowing about it. As the meeting dragged on and the ranchers realized nothing was going to be done about the problem, they got louder and louder. Mare sighed as another of the more vocal antagonists spoke up yet again. This time, though, she sat up.

"Who's to say that the Meridians aren’t behind this? They dumped this town before. Doesn’t mean they won’t do it now that we’re getting back on our feet." There were a few yells of agreement and laughter at the statement. But Mare was infuriated. TJ had been in Meridianville for several weeks now and yes, at first Mare had been suspicious of her motives, but she knew better now. She was about to get up and tell them exactly what she thought of the statement when someone beat her to it.

"Nah, don’t hold with that," a strong voice said from the back of the hall. Mare turned her head to see who had spoken and Chuck MacMasters strode forward. "Her ranch lies between mine and Abner’s so she must be affected as well. Now the Meridians may have all but bankrupted the town before but they never did anything to harm themselves. If Miss Meridian wants to make a go of that ranch, and all signs point to it, then I can’t see her poisoning her own water sources. Can you?"

Mare wanted to get up and cheer but instead got up to speak. "Chuck’s right. Water in the southwest section of the Meridian ranch has been affected."

"Yeah, and you would know that, seeing as how you work for her!" came a jeer from an unknown source. Mare didn’t know quite how to respond to that and she didn’t have to.

"No, she knows because I told her and asked for her opinion. Do you have a problem with that?"

The vet turned to see TJ in the doorway. Wow! thought Mare, She sure knows how to make an appearance--and when to make it.

The hall was stunned as TJ wheeled herself through the crowd, closely followed by Paula and Erin. None of them had known she was in a wheelchair, since Mare hadn’t thought to tell anyone. Now the hall stood in silence, as even those who had been so vocal a few moments before were loath to harangue a cripple.

TJ let her eyes scan the crowd, putting all the menace her father was known for into the gaze, quickly turning away anyone who was staring. "What? Now that I’m here in person and you see that I’m not the mighty Tom Meridian, but a cripple, do you think I’m not capable of doing exactly what you suggested?" TJ’s voice was steely and full of implied power. Mare had never quite heard that tone before but she didn’t want to argue with it and neither, did it seem, did anyone else.

TJ brought herself to a halt several feet from the front of the hall, barely ten away from where Mare was sitting. "However, we find ourselves in a similar situation, don't we? And it may be beneficial to help each other out."

"We don’t need your kind of help!" There was that voice again. Mare wished she could see who it was; she’d shut him up on a semi-permanent basis.

"Fine," said TJ without inflection. "I’ll take my cleanup team and go. You can wait for the EPA to figure out what it is. However, I should inform you that I’m cleaning my section of land and until the time that all upstream of me are cleaned I’ll be diverting the contaminated streams off of my land."

That brought shocked gasps from everyone including Mare. She wouldn’t do that, would she?

TJ was enjoying herself immensely. It had been a long time since she had gotten to play the bad guy. Paula and Erin knew her too well and even her company employees had learned that her bark was worse than her bite. But this town remembered only her father. It wasn’t often she got to play like this. She turned her gaze to Mare and gave her a wink.

Did she just wink at me? She did. I can’t believe this; she’s enjoying herself. Mare saw the glint of amusement in the blue eyes that had for several seconds locked with hers.

"You can’t do that!"

"Try me," was TJ’s quick response to the yell. "Now do you want to talk about this, or shall I leave?"

There was a buzz of conversation through the hall then the Mayor spoke up. "The thing is, Miss Meridian, the town and its people don’t want to be beholden to the Meridians ever again."

"Good." TJ smiled and that, Mare realized, was actually more frightening than if she’d been angry. "Because I’m not offering this for free. I’m a businessperson and as all businesspeople know there is always a deal to be done. Now, I can have a cleanup team working within hours sorting this problem out or you can wait for the EPA. Shall we talk?" TJ’s eyes locked with the Mayor’s who nodded his agreement, then the cool, sky blue windows to the soul swept around those gathered in the hall, seeing their begrudging agreement. "Okay, then let’s get to work."

This woman is remarkable. Here she is, sitting in a room full of people who essentially hate her, and she’s just taken over the whole meeting. Ha! Mare relaxed back into her seat and watched the woman she was slowly coming to think of as more than a friend, in her element.

"The first thing I need to know is who else is likely to be affected by this pollution and what type of water source the domestic supply comes from."

"Why?" interrupted Abner

"So that my teams can fit a filtration unit so that your home supply won't be affected," replied TJ.

"Er, Miss Meridian," the Mayor spoke again.

"Please, call me TJ." TJ grinned, knowing that the use of her first name would put them off their stride even more.

There’s that smile again, thought Mare. Boy, they have no idea what they are letting themselves in for.

"Right, TJ. Well we have a small problem with the town supply. We don’t know whether it is contaminated, or if it can be."

"That’s okay. My team is all ready to fit filtration units to the pump house with the council's approval; the town won’t be affected." The mayor looked stunned. "What?" TJ raised her eyebrow. "You really think I’d sit back and watch people become ill because of this? I may be a Meridian, but I’m not my father."

********************

Mare took a quick glance at her watch as she stepped into the cool, fresh air the night had brought with it. The meeting had started at six and TJ had arrived just after seven. It was now just before eleven and they were still going strong. TJ was a wonder to behold; every time someone threw up a problem, she had an answer, no matter how stupid or petty the concern was. The whole town was rapidly coming to realize that Tom Meridian had been a reasonable businessman, who’d just happened to be a total bastard. His daughter, though, was a genius. She got things done; not because she had to use threats, though they had all seen she was good at that as well, but because she knew exactly what to do.

When TJ told them what she wanted in payment for her help, the Mayor and the town folk had been taken off guard. Mare had to admit to being a little surprised herself, though when she thought about it she knew that money wasn’t TJ’s main concern; however, getting the ranch and eventually the packing plant up and running was. So, for payment, she told them that she wanted all those unemployed, who had any farming, carpentry or mechanical skill, to work for her at the ranch and the packing plant on a minimum one-year contract.

There had been another silence at that, but Paula had brought a copy of the contract with her and passed it around. They could see right away that it was a good deal. Those being employed would get a reasonable wage and extremely good benefits, including the building of a medical center in the town. It would take time for the town to accept that TJ was different from her father, but she had made a very good start.

Now Mare was on a mission for coffee and food as she walked over to the diner; TJ had obviously been going nonstop since Mare had spoken to her earlier in the day. Paula and Erin both tried to persuade her to finish for the day, to no avail. She was on a roll and had no intention of stopping while there were things still to be sorted out.

Paula had then been dispatched back to the ranch to coordinate the cleanup team. Most of the team were visiting the ranches affected, and those likely to be, to install filtration units to protect domestic supplies. As a precaution, filtration units were being placed on every water supply, whether or not there was a current need. A smaller, four-man team had already started to backtrack up the stream to find the source of contamination.

The door of the diner swung open easily as Mare stepped into its brightly-lit domain. "Hey, honey." Rochelle had been a waitress at the Pot-o-Gold Diner for as long as Mare could remember. "They still going at it over there?"

"Hi, Rochelle," said Mare as she slid onto a seat at the counter. "Yep, they're still at it. Can I get three coffees to go?"

"Sure can," replied the plump waitress. "Anything else?"

"You got anything to eat I can take back across?"

"Brad can make you up some sandwiches and I have some pastries left. Will that do?"

"Thanks. Ham and cheese on white with mustard will be fine." Mare propped her head on her hand and watched as Rochelle called the sandwich order in to the kitchen, then busied herself taking care of the coffee and pastries.

********************

Erin sighed as she sat back and stretched. She was more than ready for bed; the day had been long and hard. But TJ looked as though she’d be going for a couple more hours. When she had the bit between her teeth she rarely stopped until she’d finished; they could be here most of the night. A light nudge to her side prompted her from the doze she had been falling into and a steaming cup was held in front of her. The waft of coffee woke her and she grinned. "Thanks, Mare, you’re a life saver." She sat up and took the coffee and the proffered sandwich.

"Does she ever stop?" Mare nodded her head toward TJ who sat at a table with several other ranchers, arranging for their cattle to be herded over to the sections of Meridian where water sources were clean.

"Not until it’s finished, she won’t." Erin took a hearty bite out of the sandwich. "It’s how she gets things done."

"She’s so focused, she didn’t even realize who put the food and coffee in front of her," replied Mare, sitting back and watching TJ.

"I know. It used to worry me when I first got to know her. When she was studying, if you didn’t stop her and put food in front of her she could go for days without eating. She was a full-time job all by herself."

"That I can believe," grinned Mare. "You okay? You look a little tired. I guess she’s been working you hard."

"TJ works hard, we work hard. It used to be she’d do all the legwork herself but now, well, she lets us help out more."

"I was surprised she came tonight. I thought she might send you or Paula, but I didn’t think she’d come herself."

"Yeah, we were pretty surprised at that as well. But she knew that she couldn’t get anywhere with these guys unless she came down here herself and got in their faces. Besides," Erin grinned, "she knew you would be here."

A smile sprung on Mare’s face. "It’s about time this town got to find out who TJ Meridian is, and not who they think she is. But it’s late and I need to get to bed and so do you and, even if she won’t admit it, so does our friend over there. Do you want to tell her it’s time to go home or do you want me to?"

"I think you have more chance of surviving than I do."

"We’ll just have to find that out, won’t we?" Finishing her coffee, Mare got to her feet and wandered over to the table where the discussions were taking place. The men all smiled as she approached. TJ had her head buried in papers so didn’t realize she was near until she placed her hand on her shoulder. "Gentlemen, I know you still have a lot of questions for Miss Meridian but I think it's about time you let her get home. She’s been working on this since early morning." The men immediately began making their apologies.

TJ was stunned. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had had the nerve to actually interrupt one of her business meetings. She was about to say something when she caught the stern look on Mare’s face and immediately thought better of it.

Erin wanted to laugh but managed to stop herself, knowing that TJ surely wouldn’t appreciate it; it might just anger her enough to make her change her mind and stay a lot longer.

Chapter 11

In spite of wanting to start right in on a search for her father, Mare had been too busy taking care of poisoned cattle and being involved with the contamination problem to even make an attempt. The news about her father had been a real shock and the uncertainty was playing havoc with her nervous system. Until she could discover something definite, however, she had decided to keep quiet about her parentage. Even with TJ. It surprised her how quickly telling TJ had come to mind… almost an automatic response. But TJ already has enough on her mind without having my problems added to it. Besides, I don't know if he'll even want to acknowledge me and I don't want anyone to witness my humiliation if that happens. For the same reason, she decided against using a detective agency, except as a last resort.

Finally, Mare was able to free up at least part of a day by rearranging several of her calls and coaxing a vet acquaintance in Sharlesburg into covering emergencies. The night before her time off, she tried to come up with an organized plan. I know my birth certificate doesn't show anything, so where do I start? At the college?

Going to the bookcase, she looked through her mother's yearbooks, which stood right next to her own. She removed the fourth year one and took it to the couch. Sitting in the corner of the couch, under the floor lamp, Mare pulled her legs up under her and started leafing through the pages. Contrary to the usual custom, no flowery sentiments were handwritten across the pictures. That brought a smile of chagrin to Mare's face. Mom, I know you always hated to see people write in books, but couldn't you have bent a little this time? I mean, come on, everybody writes in yearbooks. But not in this one. Mare's hope that a message would give away her father, or even a friend of her mother's, was useless.

The graduates were displayed according to their major field of study. What could he have majored in if he had this outstanding opportunity where a wife and child would be a hindrance? Maybe looking toward a medical career? Chemistry? Biology? I guess those are good places to start. Mare found the appropriate pages and pored over each picture, hoping to see some familiarity to her own looks. Moving from major to major, she spent two hours in a fruitless pursuit. I have no idea what he looked like. Why am I wasting my time? In frustration, she slammed the book shut and tossed it onto the low table next to the couch.

Just then the phone rang. Mare snatched it up and snapped out her name, regretting it within the second. "Doctor Gillespie." No one said anything and her frustration spoke again. "Look, if this is a joke, go play somewhere else."

"Mare?" The velvety richness of TJ's voice came through even though she spoke tentatively. Mare's face softened as her heart speeded up.

"TJ! I thought someone was trying to be funny. Sorry I didn't get by there today. Just didn't have the time. Are you okay?" I should have called her. Mare closed her eyes, picturing the beautiful face that found constant display in the gallery of her mind.

"I'm fine now. I won't keep you; I know it's late. I wanted to make sure you were all right and… I guess I… just wanted to hear your voice."

This touching revelation from such a proud woman filled Mare with a sense of awe. When she could find the words, she answered TJ. "It's good to hear yours, too. Any further news on the water problems?"

"I'll fill you in when I see you. Think you'll make it by here tomorrow?"

The vet frowned at having to hide the truth. "I might not, TJ. I have some business to take care of out of town and I'm going to try to see to it tomorrow. If I'm not too late returning, I'll give you a call, okay?"

"Two days without seeing you? I'll be getting Mare Withdrawal Syndrome." The vet heard a soft laugh that melted her insides. "Sounds like you have another busy day coming up, so I'll say goodnight."

"Goodnight, TJ. Sweet dreams." Mare hung up and sat savoring the call. Then her mind turned back to her search.

A thought occurred to her and she retrieved the yearbook. Turning to the back pages, sure enough, an address was given for each graduate. Mare didn't really know much about her mother's early life. Jane's parents had both died before Mare was born and Jane never talked about her home, leaving there after graduation and never returning.

So an address was a start, something tangible to work with. Mare got up and wrote the address down on her appointment pad. She stretched, yawned and went to bed, satisfied to have found another avenue of approach.

********************

The day had been a waste. After hours of searching through the neighborhood, Mare had found only one woman, a grandmotherly type, who remembered her mother as a young girl. She recalled that Jane had gone to college, but she wasn't able to shed any light on her boy friends. "Jane was a friendly person, but she was very discreet about her own concerns. If you tried to trade tidbits with her, it was mostly all one-way."

Mare listened to the few tales the neighbor remembered then graciously thanked her and left.

It was late when the vet returned home, dejected with the futility of her search. She flopped on the couch and reached for the phone then realized it was much too late to call TJ. She looked yearningly at the instrument that could connect her with the woman whose mere voice made her heart sing. I'll call her first thing in the morning.

Now what? Try as she might, Mare could come up with no solution other than to hunt down and call each and every male in Jane's graduating class. The only bright side she could see to that was that their names more than likely wouldn't have changed. Jotting down a note to pick up a computer program that listed current names, addresses and phone numbers on CD-ROMs, she decided she would set a regimen of making 20 calls a night.

********************

The Meridian Ranch had virtually changed overnight. The day after the town meeting cattle started to arrive from the ranches that were affected by the contaminated streams. Keeping the cattle from the various herds separate had been a problem at first. But that had become easier when a truckload of men drove up from the town to give a hand getting the herds into the correct pastures.

Those same ten men also became the first to be hired by Paula and by the end of the day the ranch was once again fully operational. Of course, with the hiring of hands came a few more problems. The cookhouse needed a cook, which was soon settled as two of the new hands' wives offered to do those duties. Paula immediately hired them on the same terms as the hands.

Most of the men and their families lived in the town and a few of them opted to stay there. Most of them, however, once they had gotten a look at the accommodations, decided to move onto the ranch. The bunkhouse initially would be home to the single ranch hands, and the families would have the houses. Eventually, TJ planned to have new houses built for single ranch hands on the basis of two sharing each house. The bunkhouse then would be converted to a gym and leisure center, complete with a pool.

The day after the arrival of the cattle from the other ranches, Bill Jacobs, Meridian's new foreman, arrived with his wife and they settled into their new home. The first thing on Bill's agenda was to get the hired hands together and find out what experience they had. Most of them at one time or another had worked on ranches, though few had been permanent hands due to the economic situation in the area.

The next thing was to ensure that each of the men had a horse. Several of the men had their own which they would bring with them; the others, though, were without a ride. On any other ranch this might have caused a major problem; horses weren't exactly inexpensive. However, after a short discussion with Erin, Bill had found himself with a bank account and budget to provide quality horseflesh for the ranch hands.

A barn near the bunkhouse provided sufficient stalls for the animals for the current work crew. Adjacent to the barn, a large, fenced pasture held a run-in shed that could be used for feeding and shelter for a larger herd of horses when necessary.

With the limited amount of work hands available, Paula hired several local teenagers to tend to the cleaning duties in both barns and to help with getting up the hay. The kids met at the local high school and were picked up in the van and driven to the ranch. After work had finished they were all taken back. They were paid and given the opportunity to ride and to learn about the running of the ranch. The only condition of their employment was that when they returned to school in the fall, their grades must remain at a 'C' or above. TJ didn't want any parents to complain that working at the ranch after school or on weekends was in any way detrimental to their studies.

Apart from helping Bill with buying the horses, Erin also kept an eye on the cleanup operation. Their main concern was to ensure that the streams no longer caused harm to the environment. The cleanup team backtracked the streams to within ten miles of Sharlesburg. There they had found an area of wetlands where containers of industrial waste had been dumped. Erin passed the information on to the EPA and left it to deal with the investigation of who was responsible for it.

TJ's cleanup teams worked with a team from the EPA to clean the wetlands and prevent further damage being done. Then they had moved back toward the ranches, cleaning the streambed. That process was going to take at least a week to complete, then they would bring in pumps and oxidizing agents to re-oxygenate the streams. The final stage would be the re-introduction of fish stocks and placement of monitors to prevent contamination from occurring to that extent again.

With Erin and Paula so busy with the ranch, TJ immersed herself in running her companies. She had found it limiting to be so far away from her headquarters and had two more computers and isdn lines installed into the house, one in her bedroom and the other in her office. She directed her administrative assistant, Teresa, to field all her calls from the head office, routing only those that required TJ's personal attention. Business meetings were conducted via videoconferencing; those who didn't know better had no idea that TJ wasn't sitting in her office in downtown Atlanta.

All in all, it was a busy time for all three women. They rarely got a chance to sit down together for meals. TJ's outings on Flag were almost non-existent, due to being snowed under with work or there being no one available to assist her. Erin had offered to ask Bill to keep one of the hands near, but TJ had quashed that idea. They were still shorthanded, and keeping someone at the house just so she could go riding was a waste of resources. However, all work, no play and no Mare began to take its toll on TJ's moods.

Paula and Erin noticed that Mare hadn't been around in sometime and that her phone calls had been scarce. The times that TJ had called her she was rebuffed with flimsy excuses. Still, the whole area was busy recovering from the near disaster and Mare was the only vet in the area. It was hard not to be judgmental, but she had to be as busy as the ranch, if not busier.

********************

Mare forcibly devoted herself to achieving her target of 20 calls per night. Unfortunately, it cut heavily into her time visiting with TJ. The vet was making constant over-the-phone excuses as to why her visits had slacked off. Her words sounded evasive, even to her, and the calls were too brief. But she had to cut them short to allow time for the investigative calls. I'm sorry, TJ. I'll make it up to you later.

As the days stretched into a week, then two weeks, Mare's frustration was building on two fronts: first, missing opportunities to see TJ--she'd only been able to visit her twice; and second, having no success with her search. So far, the few men who remembered her mother as a classmate had no recollection of any boyfriend Jane may have had.

The vet felt overwhelmed. An already heavy caseload of animals that needed her attention had been stretched to the limit with the addition of the ones that had been poisoned and, although the poisonings had slacked off, she had had to play catch up. That, together with the buildup of nervous tension from not finding her father and another kind of tension from not seeing TJ as often as she wished to, had made her extremely irritable. Mare recognized this and fought to control it, but that was just one more weight on her back.

Finally, she squeezed in time to spend a morning at TJ's. When Mare entered the kitchen, Erin handed her a steaming mug. " Hi, stranger. Guess you've been as busy as we have."

"Yeah." Mare avoided elaborating. She threw a quick smile and saluted with her mug. "Boy, it can be the hottest day in the summer and I still need a cup of coffee to start my day… thanks. TJ in her office already?"

"No, she's not finished her morning wake-up routine yet. She has exercises she has to do three mornings a week. Paula's giving her a hand. She'll be in soon." She added an extra dish and place setting for Mare on the island.

Mare sat at the island and Erin joined her. "Erin, just what happened to cause TJ's paralysis? Would you mind telling me? I mean, I read about the mugging where her brother was killed, but it didn't mention what happened to TJ." Erin didn't hesitate when she saw the loving concern in the vet's eyes. If she's as in love with TJ as she seems to be, she needs to hear this.

"Soon after Lance graduated from medical school, TJ and her brother were returning to their car after a theater performance. A gang of thugs stopped them and demanded their money. TJ handed over her purse and encouraged Lance to give them his wallet, which he did. They were trying to avoid trouble." Erin pushed the bagels and cream cheese within the doc's reach.

"A couple of them had been eyeing up TJ and decided they wanted a little more than just money, so they grabbed her. She fought back. TJ wasn't someone you wanted to mess with in those days; the muggers should have left while they had the chance. Then Lance joined the fray. TJ and Lance were making some headway against them when one of them pulled a gun. He shot Lance in the chest. He was killed instantly. TJ went berserk and had plowed through four of them--did a lot of damage, too--before the guy with the gun decided she had to go, too. He shot her in the back and the ones who were still able to, beat her senseless. Then they took off, leaving her for dead." Erin's gaze dropped to the island surface and her lips twisted.

Mare stopped in mid-bite, laid the bagel down and shook her head. Her green eyes deepened with pain. "Please go on," she whispered.

"You wouldn't have recognized her in the hospital; she was a total mess. Her face was battered. Her nose was bloodied, her lip cut, her eyes blackened and swollen shut. She had bruises all over her body and her hands were covered with cuts and scrapes. When she came to, she never even moaned. The first words out of her mouth were, 'How's Lance?'" Erin reached across to a shelf and pulled a tissue from a porcelain box, using it to wipe the tears that trickled down her face.

"She went berserk again when they told her he was dead. She screamed like a wounded animal and probably would have thrashed around had she been able to. But she was strapped down. The bullet had entered her spine and was pressing against the cord. They couldn't even operate on it. She's still carrying it around in her back. And I guess she'll be paralyzed for the rest of her life, unless there is some miraculous breakthrough."

Mare had sucked her lips in between her teeth.

"You should have seen her before. She was majestic, like a Chosen One." Erin's face had been distressed but now it lit up and her eyes revived. "But, my God, Doc, look at her, she's still magnificent. Paula and I are half in love with her ourselves."

Then her face darkened again. "But TJ didn't see it that way. She blamed herself for Lance's death. She dropped into a spiraling depression and tried to kill herself. That's why, besides her physical therapy sessions, she goes to a counselor regularly. She wasn't allowed to leave the hospital until she agreed to see one."

"She sees a counselor?"

"Yeah, not that he's doing much good. If he'd get off of the subject of her father, he might have more chance at helping her out."

"Her father?" Mare asked.

"Yeah, she has some bad hang ups about her father and she won't talk about them to anybody, not even Paula and me, even though we've seen…"

"What's going on here, show and tell?" TJ wheeled furiously into the kitchen, her face contorted. Paula came in right behind her, her face ashen. She looked at Erin with a stricken expression on her face and shook her head.

"I thought I'd made it quite clear that nobody was to speak of my father in this house." White heat shimmered from TJ's body as she flung her low-voiced castigation at Erin. "It's not enough my father had to mess with my life while he was alive, now you're helping him do it while he's dead."

The words stung. Erin's pale face matched Paula's. "I only told Mare what I thought she deserved to know. I didn't tell her anything about your father."

TJ's lips pulled back from her teeth in an ugly grimace. " I make the decisions who knows about my life and who doesn't, get that? No one… tells anybody… anything… about my father, but me." TJ threw her shoulder forward, resisting Paula's attempt to clasp it. "Is that crystal clear?"

Erin nodded.

TJ wheeled around to leave the kitchen.

Mare had been watching this exchange with surprise that Erin and Paula seemed to be so afraid of TJ's wrath. When TJ swiveled her wheelchair, Mare quickly rose and blocked her exit. Erin threw a half-shocked glance at Paula who also looked startled.

The wheelchair accidentally bumped into the vet's shins. "Get out of my way, Mare." TJ still seethed, but she wouldn't meet the vet's eyes.

The golden-haired woman didn't budge. Her voice was firm and forceful. "Talk to me, TJ."

TJ's eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared, but she still kept her gaze down. "I don't want to talk with you right now, Mare." Then the eyes came up to meet Mare's and the anger and pain pouring from them made her breath catch. TJ's voice was harsh. "You think you can just waltz in here whenever you please and pry into my family relationships?"

Mare's voice had lost some of its forcefulness. "We weren't having a discussion about your father, TJ. Erin just barely mentioned him."

"You don't know a damn thing about my father except the gossip you've heard. Is that why you made a show of getting into my good graces? So you could hang around and get some juicy tidbits to feed the gossip mills? But once I made some headway into changing the town's thinking about me, I wasn't as much use to you anymore, was I? So now you need something stronger to pass around?"

TJ's tone turned venomous and her eyes seemed to bore holes into Mare's. "Get… out… of my… way." The vet was shocked into immobility. Erin got up, took hold of Mare's arm and led her, without protest, away from the doorway. TJ propelled the chair through into the hallway like a torpedo.

The vet threw herself down on a chair, put her elbows on the island and placed her hands on either side of her pale face. She closed her eyes for a minute to regain her composure. Dropping her hands, she turned hurting eyes toward Erin and Paula who stood together at the edge of the island. "What is she talking about? Does she really think I came here just to get some gossip to tell? I thought we settled this once."

Erin looked down at her hands then back up at Mare. "Mare, I know you've been busy, but what would you think if someone hung around almost every day, waited till you fell in love with them, then just practically disappeared?"

"With only a few hurried phone calls making blatantly false excuses?" Paula added.

With a pained expression on her face, Mare put her fist to her mouth and looked into space. Then her eyes came back to Paula's. "There's a reason for that." She sniffled, fighting back the tears that threatened to start. TJ hates me. TJ hates me. I've hurt her badly and now she hates me. The terrible refrain tore at her heart.

"Oh, yeah," Paula sneered. "Let's see what excuse you come up with this time." I gotta hand it to her; she sure can look pitiful.

"I thought my father died before I was born, but I just found out he might be alive. Every bit of free time I've had, I've been searching for him."

"What?" Both women ridiculed the answer at the same time.

"It's true, honest." Mare reached into the hip pocket of her jeans and pulled out a wallet that was chained to a belt loop. She reached into the wallet and pulled out a buff piece of folded paper. Handing it to Erin, she said, "Read it. It's from my mother. It's all there." While Erin and Paula read the letter, Mare made use of the tissues in the porcelain box to wipe her face and blow her nose.

She looked at the two women and saw their expressions turn to belief as they finished reading. "I've been calling the men in my mother's graduating class. Every night I call 20 people. That's why I couldn't stay on the phone. And those excuses were so bad because I never was very good at lying." She wiped her face again. "Now, TJ hates me." She bowed her head and the tears came in earnest.

"You've hurt her pretty badly, Doc. She took all this as your turning your back on her. Abandonment, I guess. Maybe even betrayal." Paula started to hand the letter back to Mare, but Erin intercepted it.

"TJ's a proud woman, Mare. You do something that attacks that pride and she writes you off." Erin's face was filled with concern. "I'll go talk to her."

Paula raised both brows. "You sure? Want me to go with you?"

Erin smiled and shook her head. "No sense in both of us stepping into the line of fire." She patted her partner on the arm and left the kitchen.

Mare listened to this exchange with interest in spite of her upset. "Why are you two so afraid of TJ?"

Paula sat down in the chair next to Mare and grinned. "I guess it looks that way to you but we're not so much afraid of her as afraid for her."

"You mean because of the suicide attempt?"

"So, Erin has been talking too much, huh? Partly that, but mostly because TJ has an unbelievable temper. She keeps a pretty tight rein on it most of the time, but when she lets loose, run for cover! When she's that angry, sometimes she does things that physically hurt her or someone else. We try to keep that from happening by giving into her when she's on edge."

"Or by moving people away from doorways."

Paula grinned. "You got it."

Erin looked into the office and there was TJ, her head pillowed on her arms on the desk, her shoulders shaking. As soon as she stepped through the door, TJ rasped, "Get out." The curly-headed blonde kept moving toward the desk.

Picking up a square, solid bronze paperweight and without even raising her head to look, TJ flung it straight at Erin. Knowing TJ's aim was unerring, Erin was already stepping to the left and the paperweight, thankfully, sailed past her. Damn! That was a half-arm throw. I keep forgetting how strong she is.

Erin walked up next to TJ and put her hand over her friend's. TJ jerked her hand back. "I said get out!"

"TJ, honey, we shouldn't jump to conclusions about Mare. Again." Erin put a hand out and caressed the raven head.

"You think I'll believe another of her excuses?" TJ's voice broke.

Erin leaned over and put her head next to TJ's and laid her body up against TJ's back. "Oh, honey, love hurts, sometimes."

"How would you know? You have Paula."

A laugh rumbled through Erin, startling TJ. "Yeah, thank goodness. And you have Mare, honest. I have proof."

Erin could sense a subtle change in TJ and she lifted away from her, pulling her upright at the same time. "Read this. It's from Mare's mother." Erin reached in her breast pocket and handed TJ the letter. She watched as the cloud lifted from the beautiful face. She grabbed a couple of tissues and wiped TJ's cheeks and daubed at her eyes. "Mare's been on the phone for hours each night, trying to find her father. She's working her way through all the men in her mother's college yearbook."

"Why didn't she come to me about it?" Puzzled blue eyes sought Erin's.

"Why don't you come back to the kitchen and ask her that?"

"She's still here?" The light of hope coming back to those eyes was a magnificent sight and Erin marveled at their splendor.

Erin chuckled. "You know the doc. Takes more than a few mean words to scare her away. But she is upset."

TJ pulled in her lips and frowned at that news. She lowered her arms to the wheels and backed away from the desk. "How do I look?"

Even with red-rimmed eyes you look beautiful. "You look like you care."

TJ started wheeling toward the door with her friend walking beside her. "Erin?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry about the paperweight."

"At least it missed me."

"Yeah, I must need more practice." Erin's slap against her shoulder brought a tiny grin to TJ's face.

Mare's eyes lifted as she heard the wheelchair come in, but she dropped them again as the wheels receded. Almost at once, TJ's body appeared right alongside her, wheelchair turned backwards. She raised her eyes to the blue ones she loved, now rimmed with red, but still able to stir her heart.

TJ reached in her lap and handed Mare's letter back to her. Mare accepted it and took the time to put it back into her wallet with TJ watching her every move. Paula and Erin slipped unnoticed out of the room.

Finished, Mare looked back up at TJ whose eyes had gotten intense. "Mare, I'm sorry. I…"

Mare reached forward and put her fingers against the sculpted lips. "No apology necessary."

TJ clasped her hand, kissed the fingers and removed them. "I want to say this, Mare, I need to. You are the last person I would ever want to hurt, but I keep doing it, because I find it hard to trust people. I'm sorry. I don't ever want to hurt you again. I love you." TJ leaned forward and kissed her gently.

Then she leaned back. "But I do have a question for you. Why didn't you come to me to search for your father? I have resources all over the world, half of them sitting around waiting for me to put them to work. You shouldn't have to be doing this by yourself."

Mare looked down at her hands and a blush crept up her face. "What if you find him and he doesn't want me? I would be humiliated." Mare's voice got tiny. "I didn't want you to see that."

TJ leaned her elbow on the arm of the wheelchair, put her chin on her fist, smiled and waited. Finally, Mare, curious as to why TJ hadn't said anything, looked up. TJ's smile broadened. "You are trying to tell a woman in a wheelchair that you are afraid of being humiliated?" One raven eyebrow lifted higher and higher. "I've taken lessons in how to be humiliated."

At first, Mare seemed surprised, then embarrassed. Then a laugh burst from her throat and she grinned. "Okay, I get the message. When can you start the search?"

"As soon as you give me as much information as you can about your mother and your father. I'll email it to the central office in Atlanta and a team will get on it right away."

"I can give you that information right now. I've memorized every detail of my mother's history, as much as I know of it. And I reached up to the P's in my calls."

"Okay, c'mon in the office and you can tell it to me while I put it in the computer. By the time you stop by here tomorrow evening I can let you know what progress they've made."

"Let's go." Mare jumped up to start toward the door, then turned quickly, grabbed TJ's face between her hands and kissed her hungrily. TJ threw her arms around Mare, pulled her close to feel the warmth of their bodies mingling, and kissed her back.

When they finally separated, Mare sighed. "I've waited too long for that." Then she chuckled. "But it sure was worth the wait."

TJ just grinned like she would never stop and they headed into the office.


To be continued in Part 5

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