DISCLAIMER: The characters of Xena and Gabrielle are
not mine (Renaissance Pictures/MCA Universal have them).I borrowed them and LaLa’s disclaimer. My attempt at a very short story inspired by the wonderful efforts of La La. Yeah I know no prizes for coming second.
This story is for entertainment purposes only and is not meant to infringe on any copyrights held by MCA Universal or Renaissance Pictures.
MY KINGDOM FOR A HORSE
by Lins
Jan 1999
Grecian isolated beach. Day. Clear blue Aegean sea lapping gently at the shore. Xena and Gabrielle lying on the sand after a quick dip. Argo enjoying a swim.
X: Everywhere we go looks so much like New Zealand.
G: I must send a scroll to Mum describing this place.
X: Why don’t you try sketching it on one side of the scroll and writing on the other.
G: Yes. I will. This is great you and me just relaxing on
this holy day.
X: Two weeks of holy days in a row would be better.(Xena begins to drift off)
G: Xena.
X: (opens one eye) Mmm.
G: We’ve been travelling together for four solstices now.
X: Mmm.
G: You know how I feel about you.
X: Mmm.
G: How much I care about you.
X: Mmm.
G: How much I’d "Sacrifice" for you.
X: Walk a marathon over hot coals just to sweat in my shadow.
G: Yes. No.
X: No! (frowns)
G: Yes. Speaking of walking a marathon.
X: We’re not getting a chariot.
G: Rub some oil on your back Xena?
X: Gabrielle not if it’s going to cost me.
G: Xena a horse, I’m ready for a horse of my own.
X: Gabrielle before I got Argo I practised riding many horses.
G: Slow learn....(stops)
X: Even a second hand horse costs more dinars than we could get our hands on legally. Now what were you saying about my back and oil?
G: I could call my horse Fargo. Argo and Fargo.
X: That’s enough sun for you today Gabrielle.
G: A small donkey? My ass.
X: Your ass?
G: My own ass.
X: Don’t go there Gabrielle.
G: Oh Xena.
X: Lets enjoy our holy day. Gabrielle we can talk about your ass anytime. (laughs)
G:(starts to rub oil on Xena’s shoulders)
X: Mmm. I suppose we could review your transport needs.
(both smile)
G:(massaging Xena’s shoulders)
X: How do you feel about a Winnebago?
( Argo emerges from the sea walks towards them dripping wet and munching on a squid)
G: Xena, look at Argo’s stomach it’s enormous!
X: Argo’s eating raw squid!
X: ( Xena examines Argo’s expanding girth)
G: Is Argo sick?
X: Gabrielle I think Argo’s ............ pregnant.
By the look of her I’d say about eight months.
G: But she was only in the water for ten minutes.
Must be a phantom pregnancy.
X: ( Xena feels Argo’s stomach again)
X: No there is definitely something alive in there.
G: Probably more squid.
X: No, Argo’s about to give birth. Gabrielle stand back.
( Argo starts panting, Gabrielle boils water, Xena looks for a cigar)
X:( encouraging birth advise)
X: Push Argo push! Pull Gabrielle pull!
G: ( grabs two emerging hooves and gently pulls)
G: A baby horse. Xena she’s.......( has a quick look) Yes she’s a she. She’s so beautiful. I shall call her Fargo.
X: Gabrielle this is no ordinary baby horse. The pregnancy was only minutes, the birth seconds.
G: Xena I’m going to keep her.
X: Gabrielle this could be EVIL FARGO.
X: ( Xena draws her sword) Stand back Gabrielle.
G: Xena no! I won’t let you do this. You can’t kill Fargo.
X: Gabrielle, your such a drama queen. I’m cutting the umbilical cord. But Gabrielle don’t you think what Argo has done is very strange.
G: I know, horses don’t eat squid.
X: No. I mean the birth.
G: DAYHAWK! ( authors note some of the spelling has been changed to protect the innocent).
X: Gabrielle, stand back Fargo’s going through puberty.
( Xena, Gabrielle and Argo watch in total amazement as Fargo rapidly ages, turning into a mature full size......STALLION. Fargo rears up.)
X: Oh my......... he’s a big fella.
( Argo faints, Gabrielle faints, Xena catches Gabrielle as she hits the ground)
X: ( gently taps Gabrielle’s face to wake her)
X: Are you alright? Come on Gabrielle it’s not like we haven’t seen one of those before. I’m sure Perdicas had one.
G: Xena. ( coming around slowly)
( Fargo mane flying in the breeze gallops in slow motion off and out of sight)
G: Xena, I had a vision.
X: I had deja vu myself.
G: In my vision Fargo spoke to me. He’s going to.........
Rome.
TO BE CONTINUED............... unless I’m banished.